Dad's leaving.

ok my Dad. well my parents divorced bit under a year ago. it was hard, but then wasn't never gonna be easy. i'm 15, the oldest of 3 daughters, i saw/heard a lot more than they did.. i love him so much, i really do, but he'll always have to earn my respect, its gonna take a long time for him to get that back off me, there're a lot of things i can't forgive him for just yet. our bond isnt amazin, i never have "deep" chats with him or anythin like that.

anyways, my dad went into depression when they split .. it was horrible to watch, he had no one left, he used to moan to me for hours every night about his crappy life n how much he hated everythin bla bla bla.

then about 5 months ago he told me he met someone, i was a bit surprised but thought hey fair enough. he said he met her online .. and that she lives in morrocco. he went missin for a while shortly after, he didnt tell me where he went and would answer his fone etc, turns out he went to morrocco for 2 weeks to meet her. he came back adamant she was the 1 he was gonna marry. she applied to come live over here, she got declined, so shes trying again on the 19th, but they aint got much chance of her gettin through again, so i asked my dad what happens after that, if they say no again ? he said well she only gets that 1 last chance, so if they say no then i'm goin to live out there, i got nothin to live for in this country anymore so thats it, i'll go there.

i'm gonna miss him so much if he does go, and my younger sisters dont no yet .. he hasnt told them, i think he's presuming i'm gonna do it .. :confused:

its gonna really hurt 'em though, and i dont wanna do that .. so thats my question, WHAT do i do ?!

Reply 1

generalebriety

16

I'm sorry to hear that, but really, you can't do anything, can you? Apart from force your dad at verbal gunpoint to tell everyone else his plans, as soon as possible. What makes you dislike your dad, anyway? "He'll always have to earn my respect" and so on?

Reply 2

Becca <3.

1

hmmm, well he messed my life up, at one point, n he nearly ruinned my mum when they were together. and ye, spose i cant, but i mean bout tellin my sisters. i dno how they're gonna react, but i know its not gonna be good.

Reply 3

generalebriety

16

No anonymous?

Edit: ah, new user anyway. Fair enough. Well, of course it's not going to be good, but it's not your responsibility, it's his - even if you have to smack him to get him to do it.

Reply 4

Captain Scarlet

1

generalebriety

No anonymous?QUOTE]
leave the poor girl alone lol and if u really wanna him 2 stay becca j x then u need 2 talk 2 him and tell him ur feelings its not fair on u or ur 2 sisters

Reply 5

Becca <3.

1

ye i supose, i still gota deal with it though, whether its my responsibilty or not... umm ye .. i have totally no idea how to work this site thingy.. a friend recomended it to me, not quite got the hang of it yet!!

Reply 6

mike_J

2

You need to hit the 'post as anonymous' button, if you're going to post a quick reply.

Reply 7

Captain Scarlet

1

mike_J

You need to hit the 'post as anonymous' button, if you're going to post a quick reply.

i think she knows that now lol and maybe rather than telling her how 2 work tsr we should help her????

Reply 8

Becca <3.

1

yeah, i gathered ha ha ooo i'm so stoopid, ah well too late now. no one knows who i am anyways so its ok.
whats latest neg rep all about though ?!!?

Reply 9

BlackHawk

17

He hasn't got anything to live for in this country?

What about his three kids? :mad:

Reply 10

~NC~

11

I agree with you Nic. What is he saying there is nothing left in this country, whether he realises it or not, he has a family here, and its part his responsibility that he looks after them, he cant go jetting off, never to return. To the op, have you tried talking to him about the fact that you dont want him to go? He obviously has his mind set but is there anyway you can talk him out of leaving? I know what you mean when you say youll miss him, i havent seen my dad since i was 4, im know 16, 17 soon :frown:

So a big

to you.

Reply 11

Becca <3.

1

meh. i dont no ?! he obv wants her more than his kids i supose? well its his choice at the end of the day. we'll still see him .. but it'll be months till we do. thats all thats worryin me, n especially me youngest sis, shes only jus 8, n is all innocent to everythin!

Reply 12

random_bloke

1

BlackHawk

He hasn't got anything to live for in this country?

What about his three kids? :mad:

comments like that really don't help.

i went through my dad leaving after he met someone else.....and what i couldn't cope with is people voicing opinions about the conduct of my father.

To the OP.....just remember that it is not your argument to have.....you don't need to take sides....you don't need to voice an opinion....it's not your responsibility. I hope all is ok...and feel free to PM me if you want.

Reply 13

BlackHawk

17

random_bloke

i went through my dad leaving after he met someone else.....and what i couldn't cope with is people voicing opinions about the conduct of my father.

Well perhaps then she shouldn't post about her personal life on an internet forum. It invites in opinions of other people. Really. :rolleyes:

Reply 14

random_bloke

1

BlackHawk

Well perhaps then she shouldn't post about her personal life on an internet forum. It invites in opinions of other people. Really. :rolleyes:

i think she posted for support...not for you to slag off her dad. There are real people behind the username you know.

Reply 15

Becca <3.

1

man nearly 13 years without your dad ?!?! how do u cope?!!? i dno how im gonna handle a few months never mind 13 YEARS!?! :eek:

well ye sendin an even biggererrrr hug back to u!!

its hard to explain, i mean like im so not as close to him as me mum, n i spose im scared of his reaction.. he could jus totally blow.. or cry his heart out n that be even worse!!

Reply 16

BlackHawk

17

random_bloke

i think she posted for support...not for you to slag off her dad. There are real people behind the username you know.

I'm not slagging off her Dad. I merely pointed out that having three kids was a good reason to stick around. If I had the intention of slagging off her Dad then I would have.

So how about not taking things so personally?

Reply 17

BlackHawk

17

Becca J x

man nearly 13 years without your dad ?!?! how do u cope?!!? i dno how im gonna handle a few months never mind 13 YEARS!?! :eek:

well ye sendin an even biggererrrr hug back to u!!

its hard to explain, i mean like im so not as close to him as me mum, n i spose im scared of his reaction.. he could jus totally blow.. or cry his heart out n that be even worse!!

No matter where he goes though, you can always visit him, and he can always visit you. Divorces are really hard for people to go through. It must not be easy for him, or you.

Reply 18

Captain Scarlet

1

i dont think he was slagging off her dad, just sympathising with her, i think she should talk 2 him about it and not just leave it, even if there relationship isnt special he is still their dad and important 2 them, wat about the youngest is it fair she is without a dad??? no its not, she needs a dad and that is the most important thing in the world 2 her, well becca j i think u need 2 talk 2 him and if u dont want the confrontation write him a letter or something, good luck *hug*

Reply 19

Becca <3.

1

ye i see where u coming from, but he's not too hastey to stop and think about it though, so he cant be that bothered if that makes sense. i mean i know hes bothered but .. he just doesnt show it .. kinda frustratin

Dad's leaving.

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