Starting up FWBs?

Please bare in mind... I am talking about pursuing a casual relationship here.. Not a romantic relationship in any way. So please no mention of how he must not be into a relationship etc because neither am i! Also if you don't agree with FWB relationships then perhaps this is not a thread to respond to.

OK so i am a 24 year old woman who casually hooked up with a man (21 years old) just before New Year. He was hot and the sex was descent. He then returned home to spend christmas time and the university holidays with family, so was out of my city (York).

After a while we exchanged text messages. He was excited and eager to have another encounter so we of course had rather racy conversations and he requested some pics, which I sent (faceless) and he seemed to be dying of anticipation.. Had lots of fun teasing..

However, he should be due back soon to York if he is not here already. A week ago I text him to ask him when he would be back. I have heard nothing since.

Why would he bail out on having sex again after showing so much enthusiasm? I am wanting to message him one last time to see if he wants to hook up... What should I say?

I am looking for a **** buddy/fwb and I am very busy I don't have much time to seek one out. How do I maximise my chances of this working out?

It might be worth mentioning that I told him I will be moving away to London after summer (which is of course far from here) to do postgrad at Imperial, not sure if that could be something to do with the lack of response? Of course this is part of the reason i do not want to start anything serious because I will be moving.

Thanks! Your help and perspective will be deeply appreciated.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 1

Jebedee

You're a girl and you need to ask advice on how to find a guy who wants to have sex?
*face slams on desk*

Reply 2

Hal.E.Lujah

Don't try so hard, the main thing about these sort of relationships is that they're casual.

Reply 3

JD95

Where do I sign up? I won't take up much of your time. :colone:

Reply 4

fabmaester

It will be the best thirty seconds of your life, I promise.

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

Original post by Jebedee

You're a girl and you need to ask advice on how to find a guy who wants to have sex?
*face slams on desk*

No not exactly I was asking about starting a specific FWB 'relationship' with someone i have already slept with.

Yes it is easy to start a casual arrangement but at the moment I spend most time in work where of course I would never start such an arrangement. I work in a large office with over 100 people on my floor alone and many of them young professionals and have had 3 guys ask me out just this week gone for example but after learning the hard way when I was younger I never mix business with pleasure, or at least that kind!

I am one of those women who is very paranoid about my safety. For some reason it feels safer for me to hook up with students (mature usually) in the city as opposed to other men... Don't ask me why. I do not plan to head out with my friends for a few weeks now, and hence meet another casual encounter, due to huge work commitments and deadlines approaching the end of the financial year but I really would like to have some casual fun to bust a little stress and release some endorphins!

Also generally let us not assume that all men will want sex with any woman at any time.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

Original post by Hal.E.Lujah

Don't try so hard, the main thing about these sort of relationships is that they're casual.

That's true, thank you. The funny thing is though quite often it is casual relationships end up more complicated and hard work than serious ones if one is not careful.

I say I don't even have time to find a casual relationship yet here I am spending time dithering on about it on an internet forum... I think I am just so busy and stressed that it is making me sexually frustrated (shock, horror for a woman to say all this) and in the past few years I have always had between 2-4 FWBs at the same time, but here at this time I find myself with none because the recent ones keep trying to get serious on me! Argh!

Reply 7

Hal.E.Lujah

Original post by Anonymous

Hah it can get messy if you over think it a bit. You've probably had more than me with that kinda amount but sometimes you just need someone to say it. :redface: