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Long distance becomes short distance....
Okay, this is going to sound a little confusing I know, but bear with me.
My boyfriend and I met online - he's from Northern Ireland and I'm from Canada. We did all the meeting in real life and that sort of thing, and have been dating for the past two years, even though for the majority of our relationship we haven't seen each other. We've been traveling back and forth over the ocean, spending anywhere from a week to a month visiting each other. The time we've actually gotten to spend together has been amazing, and we get along fantastically. The long distance has been hard, but we've managed to get through it okay. However.
I'm going to Northern Ireland to do my Master's degree, so we're actually going to be in the same place. We're both thrilled that we'll finally get to be a normal couple without a computer screen inbetween us, but at the same time I'm incredibly nervous. Even though we've been dating for over two years, we haven't been a huge presence in each other's lives as you can imagine. I'm worried that trying to fit into his life over there might not go so well. He says that everything will be fine and he's looking forward to me getting to Belfast so we can be together, but does he realize that he's going to have to give up some of his "with the guys" time?
We're both used to doing whatever we want without consulting the other because it was never an issue - the other one was never there to consult.
Basically, I'm just looking for some peoples opinions about this. Am I worrying about it too much because I'm just nervous, or is this going to be difficult for both of us to adjust to? Can any guys give their input on what they'd be thinking if for the past two years they've had a relationship where they don't have to do anything relationshipish and instead get to spend all their time with their guy friends, and then all of a sudden their girlfriend is there expecting attention?
This sounds ridiculous I know...dating my guy for two years and now I'm scared to go be with him! What's wrong with me?
My boyfriend and I met online - he's from Northern Ireland and I'm from Canada. We did all the meeting in real life and that sort of thing, and have been dating for the past two years, even though for the majority of our relationship we haven't seen each other. We've been traveling back and forth over the ocean, spending anywhere from a week to a month visiting each other. The time we've actually gotten to spend together has been amazing, and we get along fantastically. The long distance has been hard, but we've managed to get through it okay. However.
I'm going to Northern Ireland to do my Master's degree, so we're actually going to be in the same place. We're both thrilled that we'll finally get to be a normal couple without a computer screen inbetween us, but at the same time I'm incredibly nervous. Even though we've been dating for over two years, we haven't been a huge presence in each other's lives as you can imagine. I'm worried that trying to fit into his life over there might not go so well. He says that everything will be fine and he's looking forward to me getting to Belfast so we can be together, but does he realize that he's going to have to give up some of his "with the guys" time?
We're both used to doing whatever we want without consulting the other because it was never an issue - the other one was never there to consult.
Basically, I'm just looking for some peoples opinions about this. Am I worrying about it too much because I'm just nervous, or is this going to be difficult for both of us to adjust to? Can any guys give their input on what they'd be thinking if for the past two years they've had a relationship where they don't have to do anything relationshipish and instead get to spend all their time with their guy friends, and then all of a sudden their girlfriend is there expecting attention?
This sounds ridiculous I know...dating my guy for two years and now I'm scared to go be with him! What's wrong with me?
You haven't been really dating him. Well maybe for a small proportion of the time. Most of the time you've just been like old friends who moved away, staying in touch and occassionally visiting each other.
It could be cool in Belfast. But I would be prepared for it all to hit the fan and be ready/able to move on or at least continue with your degree. Don't pin too much hope on this. But don't doom it before its began. Caution.
It could be cool in Belfast. But I would be prepared for it all to hit the fan and be ready/able to move on or at least continue with your degree. Don't pin too much hope on this. But don't doom it before its began. Caution.
you're so lucky! i've been with my bf for a couple of years and still haven't met up, he's considering coming over this christmas or at the latest next summer.seriously, if you get on fantastically then you already have a major advantage over a lot of couples. just watch jerry springer and you'll see what i mean. 
it'll be tricky to adjust at first, but at least you'll have him by your side. no worries.
it'll be tricky to adjust at first, but at least you'll have him by your side. no worries.wow dear im impressed. well done. u both have so much will poweer and strength to keep it going. i know i need yes need to see my bf every other day but not even thats possible. but im sure it will work out fine. you'll find you will be making different mates and there will be a health balance between seeing each other and your mates. at first you'll probably want to be with each other 24/7 becuase its something new to you both. just dont think about it. good luck have a wicked time.
Anonymous
you're so lucky! i've been with my bf for a couple of years and still haven't met up, he's considering coming over this christmas or at the latest next summer.seriously, if you get on fantastically then you already have a major advantage over a lot of couples. just watch jerry springer and you'll see what i mean. it'll be tricky to adjust at first, but at least you'll have him by your side. no worries.
it'll be tricky to adjust at first, but at least you'll have him by your side. no worries.erm i honestly dont know how you are in a relationship and cant see each other. surely your lacking some vital characteristics of a relationship. i was having a thing with this boy for 2 yrs and in one of them i never saw him so although we felt very close we never said we were dating because we hadnt done couply stuff.but i understand ur feelings...
i have no idea how to quote...but to janesmith...yeah you're right, there are some vital characteristics missing. it's pretty tough to not be able to actually be with him, and i'd never say we were dating due to the lack of any dates ..but i still call him my bf coz he's everything to me that a bf would be... and he seems happy with it lol
..but i still call him my bf coz he's everything to me that a bf would be... and he seems happy with it loland we see each other all the time on webcam. not the same, i know, but covers up spots. great concealer, i have to say. ok that's me done
janesmith
hahah true but u always have to be wearing something good for the webcam as in clothes just not anyold tee. erm as long as ur happy thats fine. ive been thru what uve been thru but now i actually see my new bf im like how did i manage not seeing my ex ever!
wahoo i found how to quote!...slow me...
yeah give me a couple more years and i'll probs be thinking "that janesmith was so right..."
i was planning to go see him next summer but seeing how beirut is getting a bit bombed now....not a great plan
Don't you all want physical intimacy too? I couldn't go 2 years with a bf across the ocean that I couldn't see, hug, kiss, etc. That's rough.
shady lane
Don't you all want physical intimacy too? I couldn't go 2 years with a bf across the ocean that I couldn't see, hug, kiss, etc. That's rough.
it's rough, but more effective than a condom
shady lane
Don't you all want physical intimacy too? I couldn't go 2 years with a bf across the ocean that I couldn't see, hug, kiss, etc. That's rough.
It's REALLY rough, but think about how great it is when you finally do get to see them.
It sucks and all, but I'd rather wait a million years to be with this guy than to have one with me all the time who I only loved half as much. He's worth it.
kitten with a whip
It's REALLY rough, but think about how great it is when you finally do get to see them.
It sucks and all, but I'd rather wait a million years to be with this guy than to have one with me all the time who I only loved half as much. He's worth it.
It sucks and all, but I'd rather wait a million years to be with this guy than to have one with me all the time who I only loved half as much. He's worth it.
ditto
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