The Student Room Group
Reply 1
A Lack of Confidence is a bitch, but the only way to really sure it is to actually get out there and ask for the Number, as soon as you do it once, the next times become easy
Reply 2
I suggest you practice a little on people you don't care about first, that will build it up. Go out to a bar/club with a couple friends and just go about flirting strongly and verbally with random girls. It doesn't matter if they reject you, infact if they do they will help you care less about being rejected. Of course there is a difference between how you will feel about approaching this girl you like and random girls in a club, but even practicing on insignificant girls will help you gain confidence and indifference.
Reply 3
I have a friend who has the best strategy in the world. He walks into a club and 10-20 minutes later he walks out again with a chick to take back to his place.

Wanna know how he does it? Simple. He just walks up to 20 random girls he likes the look of and asks them straight out if they want to ****. 9 times out of 10 they try to slap him, but he doesn't give a toss if the 10th one is up for it!
Reply 4
Cano234
A Lack of Confidence is a bitch, but the only way to really sure it is to actually get out there and ask for the Number, as soon as you do it once, the next times become easy

I just envy those guys so much that can dance and enjoy themselves...
Talk to people without feeling self concious...
Why do I have such a huge personality deficit??
I'd rather look like shrek and have the intellect of a walrus than be so reserved.

It's ****ing horrible. And I'm sure there are plenty of guys out there that can agree with this :frown:
Reply 5
Anonymous
I just envy those guys so much that can dance and enjoy themselves...
Talk to people without feeling self concious...
Why do I have such a huge personality deficit??
I'd rather look like shrek and have the intellect of a walrus than be so reserved.

It's ****ing horrible. And I'm sure there are plenty of guys out there that can agree with this :frown:


a lack of self confidence often comes from either past experience or not liking the way that you look etc. Im not that big of a Club person so dont meet a lot of people in that enviroment, but just believe that your a great guy and that she will deffinaterly give you her number:smile:
Reply 6
Anonymous
I just envy those guys so much that can dance and enjoy themselves...
Talk to people without feeling self concious...
Why do I have such a huge personality deficit??
I'd rather look like shrek and have the intellect of a walrus than be so reserved.

It's ****ing horrible. And I'm sure there are plenty of guys out there that can agree with this :frown:

Guys like that are in minority and they may dance and enjoy it but they still have to 'bite the bullet' to some extent to muster the courage to ask for a girl's number or whatever.

You havent got a personality deficit, you just feel awkward like every other person in the club, some are just better at hiding it :wink:

It all comes with time and a little help from a beer (but not too many)!

Intellect is everything :wink: any decent girl will want to talk to you because of your personality, if you're polite and charming the world is your oyster :wink:
Reply 7
Anonymous
A rant.

Just been for a night out, yes i'm pissed now.

Missed yet AGAIN the chance to get the phone no. of someone special.


****ing alcohol brings out my emotions DAMNIT.

Lacking confidence is the worst ****ing curse anyone could give you. I HATE IT.
*cry*
:mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:


Was just flicking through some old threads when i came across this one, and have to say i have the exact same problem! Infact, the exact same situation as yours happened ....(same day too...spooky!) haha it sucks tho....i can just hope that one day i WILL pluck up the courage to get the number....otherwise i shall remain a lonely singleton forever :frown: :redface:

not rele any useful advice there, but just to say you are NOT alone!! :biggrin:
Reply 8
Why cant the girls ask the lads for there number for a change, it would make life a lot easier
MBenno
Why cant the girls ask the lads for there number for a change, it would make life a lot easier


Social gender roles are more strongly ingrained into our minds than we like to think.
Reply 10
I'm a lad and 60% of the time its the girl askin 4 my number. I reckon its a simple thing pulling a girl you like in a club.

Try different things to different girls eg. if a girl is by herself, go chat her up by urself but if they're in a lil group, take a m8 over and do the 'fancy a dance' or even just a chat.

Another thing, girls love boys who dance, so get on the dance floor and wiggle your bum! lol

I don't understand why its a big thing, girls get just as nervous as boys do...
Reply 11
maybe you can put on a gangsta image. lets face face it, girls love badboy.
just go to one and say 'wassup brothermanhomeydawgblud, shizzle nizzle grizzle fizzle of tha heezy fo sheezy'

they ll be all over you
Reply 12
dr octagon
maybe you can put on a gangsta image. lets face face it, girls love badboy.
just go to one and say 'wassup brothermanhomeydawgblud, shizzle nizzle grizzle fizzle of tha heezy fo sheezy'

they ll be all over you


lol such a theory!:p:
Reply 13
dr octagon, your so controversial but yet so funny. Keep it up and a rep will come your way lol
Reply 14
I find it easier than I did. I think I finally realised that getting turned down isn't so bad, and this added confidence has worked in my favour. I've got a few numbers in the last few weeks. Sadly none of them has led to anything :frown: but I'm not giving up.
I never ask for a girl's number because the rejection would damage the lil confidence i have, but i thing always works for me is to pay no attention to the ladies at all. I do my own ting with my own mates and lucky enough i get 1-2 opportunities coming right at me. They usually open up with "aw trying to get drunk" or say i'm cute or something and then it's all down to me then which is ok because their compliment would boost my confidence. I guess it's about being different and not be 1 of those guys that runs straight over and asks numbers or stares at girls. Starring aint a good thing imo, i guess different things work different for different people, it's up to you to find what it is.
Reply 16
It's not about asking for a girl's number unless you've already pulled her, then you can just get it when you leave.

Asking for it upfront is just stupid, you need to get to know her a bit first, so it's easier to go in for a kiss (an emotional response) than it is to request a number (an intellectual response).

Then if you like her and she seems to dig you, ask for her number, and txt her a couple days later to see when she'll be there next. Then see her again, and arrange a date in person.

That's what I'd do anyway!
Don't beat yourself up over it mate, most people will always be scared of asking for numbers etc. You need to try again next time you get the chance and if you feel you cant, just try again until you do. Once you have had one success your confidence will grow!

Keep at it, you will get there in the end!
Fake it until you make it.