What do you class as cheating?

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S1elyak1
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I was talking about this with my friends and I said anything from a kiss onwards but my friend said she doesn't think kissing is cheating. What do you class as cheating?
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Joaqueem
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A mere look at the opposite sex is considered cheating for me.
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Changing Skies
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I was having this conversation with a friend who thinks flirting (whether it be in person or over text/the internet) is cheating.

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Slyca
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(Original post by Joaqueem)
A mere look at the opposite sex is considered cheating for me.
I kind of agree, it makes me feel I'm not good enough


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MidnightDream
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I would say kiss upwards is cheating too
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dreadpiraterach
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Kissing or further.
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awe
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Kissing is certainly cheating. o.O I've never met anyone who thinks otherwise.

I think there is also definitely such a thing as 'emotional' cheating - so while flirting with the cashier once a week as you pay for your milk isn't necessarily a crime, holding a consistent intimate friendship that 'relies' on flirting, with clear attraction between the two and some emotional investment and development - that is cheating, to me.

Basically... if you feel bad doing it, you feel like you shouldn't or can't tell your partner, or you have to wonder whether it's cheating or not - it's probably cheating.
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Arkasia
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I consider using Oddjob in Goldeneye as cheating.

Scummy little dwarf man >.<
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Aku-gila
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I don't think kissing counts as cheating :dontknow:
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Oxford Blues
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cheating is a stupid concept anyway that derives from insecurity and an outmoded view of how a relationship needs to work (marriage). I don't see the problem with casual sex given that it's safe and I wouldn't condemn a girlfriend for having fun with other sexual partners.

EDIT: sex isn't some sacred act. what's the big deal?
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Hal.E.Lujah
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It's that moment, that one flash of an instant, where you decide you either don't care about the other persons feelings and do it anyway, or walk away. For some that's kissing, for others it's sex. Anyone who's found themselves in that sort of situation knows exactly what I'm talking about.
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SoftPunch
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(Original post by Joaqueem)
A mere look at the opposite sex is considered cheating for me.
This all the way! Even re-mark on how a certain member of the opposite gender is attractive - it's like woah woah woah; you didn't!
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S1elyak1
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(Original post by Lucy96)
I was having this conversation with a friend who thinks flirting (whether it be in person or over text/the internet) is cheating.

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Flirting, really?

I'm a natural flirt so I'd be screwed if everyone felt that way!
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awe
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(Original post by Oxford Blues)
cheating is a stupid concept anyway that derives from insecurity and an outmoded view of how a relationship needs to work (marriage). I don't see the problem with casual sex given that it's safe and I wouldn't condemn a girlfriend for having fun with other sexual partners.

EDIT: sex isn't some sacred act. what's the big deal?
I used to think just like this, and even told my partner I felt that way in our first week of knowing each other. Sex is great - why deny someone it, if they want to have it? They can still love you and enjoy getting their kicks elsewhere, no?

A month in, and I felt completely and totally the opposite. Maybe you just need to fall in love to see it. P:

I don't really like the idea of marriage itself, and I dislike most outmoded trappings on relationships. However, if you are entering into a relationship that is built on, amongst other things, faithfulness and loyalty within the love (i.e respect!!) then cheating is a huge, huge problem. It's a total insult; it's a never-ending slap in the face. It hurts so much and can break you down. Sex/intimacy isn't some sacred act, but it's our act, and I don't want him to give it to anyone else - same goes for romantic affection, love, etc.
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SoftPunch
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(Original post by kayleighisonfire)
Flirting, really?

I'm a natural flirt so I'd be screwed if everyone felt that way!
Lol. I don't even know if I flirt or am just being friendly most of the time. I'm equally chatty and open to both genders but when I try and be friendly to guys I always get re-marks of being too flirty... Surely that would mean I am flirting with girls then - should it make me bi? Yes. Am I? The last time I've checked I wasn't.
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Oxford Blues
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(Original post by awe)
I used to think just like this, and even told my partner I felt that way in our first week of knowing each other. Sex is great - why deny someone it, if they want to have it? They can still love you and enjoy getting their kicks elsewhere, no?

A month in, and I felt completely and totally the opposite. Maybe you just need to fall in love to see it. P:

I don't really like the idea of marriage itself, and I dislike most outmoded trappings on relationships. However, if you are entering into a relationship that is built on, amongst other things, faithfulness and loyalty within the love (i.e respect!!) then cheating is a huge, huge problem. It's a total insult; it's a never-ending slap in the face. It hurts so much and can break you down. Sex/intimacy isn't some sacred act, but it's our act, and I don't want him to give it to anyone else - same goes for romantic affection, love, etc.
I guess I'll just have to wait and see!
Nonetheless, it is still based on jealousy, isn't it!
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Oxford Blues
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(Original post by SoftPunch)
Lol. I don't even know if I flirt or am just being friendly most of the time. I'm equally chatty and open to both genders but when I try and be friendly to guys I always get re-marks of being too flirty... Surely that would mean I am flirting with girls then - should it make me bi? Yes. Am I? The last time I've checked I wasn't.
Using the same (faulty) logic, you could get undressed in front of lots of guys in the changing room.
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awe
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(Original post by Oxford Blues)
I guess I'll just have to wait and see!
Nonetheless, it is still based on jealousy, isn't it!
No? When he cheated on me I wasn't jealous, I was just hurt, deeply so. There was no envy. Who would I be envious of? I didn't want to be in anyone else's position. There was no space for jealousy - jealousy is one of the stupidest things. It was sole pain and confused anger, and a whole lot of aching. (: Fun times. But no, it's not inherently about being jealous, it's about being betrayed, tricked, lied to - it's about not knowing. It's awwwwl about the trust.
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S1elyak1
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(Original post by SoftPunch)
Lol. I don't even know if I flirt or am just being friendly most of the time. I'm equally chatty and open to both genders but when I try and be friendly to guys I always get re-marks of being too flirty... Surely that would mean I am flirting with girls then - should it make me bi? Yes. Am I? The last time I've checked I wasn't.
I feel like you've just described me! I didn't even know I was doing it till it was pointed out to me by a couple of friends!
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Oxford Blues
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(Original post by awe)
No? When he cheated on me I wasn't jealous, I was just hurt, deeply so. There was no envy. Who would I be envious of? I didn't want to be in anyone else's position. There was no space for jealousy - jealousy is one of the stupidest things. It was sole pain and confused anger, and a whole lot of aching. (: Fun times. But no, it's not inherently about being jealous, it's about being betrayed, tricked, lied to - it's about not knowing. It's awwwwl about the trust.
It looks like I touched a nerve there (I don't mean to sound patronizing, I'm trying to be sincere )

What I mean is that wanting to commit to one partner (or, rather, wanting them to commit to you) is based on jealousy. You were hurt because you had committed yourselves solely to each other and he betrayed you. I understand that. I'm talking about going in to a relationship with both parties allowing each other to sleep around
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