"I hate judgemental people"

I've often wondered how people can justify making this statement, or similar ones, when doing so is almost always judgemental itself.

"I can't stand judgemental people"
"I don't like to judge, but I think X is wrong"
"Don't judge me, you arrogant/ignorant X"

I form judgements about people from their accent and appearance, but I do my best to overcome these judgements and assumptions.
I judge people according to the way they talk or present themselves, and I question these judgements and change them if necessary.
I judge people on the things they associate and identify with, and I question these judgements too, but I rarely need to change these.
Finally, I judge people on their actions, and I simply don't see how I could live life without doing this. I judge their actions according to their moral standards, because I dislike a hypocrite, and a weakened version of my own moral standards.

Everybody judges subconsciously. I hope that nobody will try to tell me that they honestly, hand on heart, do not form any instant assumptions about people based on first appearances.
I also believe that everybody judges consciously. What would be the point in having a moral code, if one were not able to disapprove of those who fall outside that code? Why would we bother to consider some actions good and others bad if we did not allow it to affect the way that we perceive the actor?

There is nothing wrong with judging people. There is also nothing wrong with treating people differently based on those judgements, so long as the judgement is adjusted in the presence of evidence that it was ill-formed, the difference in treatment is legal, and the difference in treatment is based on moral principles based as much on logic as it is possible to base such things.

I therefore view with the utmost scorn those who say "I hate judgemental people", since they do not recognise the hipocrisy of their claim, its judgemental nature turning them into one of the very people they profess to hate. My loathing for such people is, of course, judgemental, but I'm not claiming that I don't judge, and I would gladly listen to the argument of a person who claims not to be judgemental, and adjust my opinion of them if they can tell me why it is not the utmost hypocrisy for them to make this claim.

Reply 1

Tom_green_day

16

People automatically judge and make assumptions on how to best deal with people. It's nothing to be ashamed of. I do it consciously to everyone I meet, and therefore I get on with everyone.

Reply 2

dbcampbell

I hate it when people have tattoos that say, 'Only God Can Judge Me'. Which is wrong, cos I then instantly judge them.

Reply 3

username1039383

21

Awkward moment when someone judges another person for judging them :teehee:

I hate irony.

I see what you're getting at, and obviously everyone makes snap judgments and such on a daily basis but I think you're being too literal.

Isn't it obvious that they mean they dislike people who are openly prejudiced and comment negatively on other peoples lifestyle with their opinions having no basis on fact or rationale? I think that's a perfectly legitimate person to dislike. Obviously the people who say this are making a "judgment" on that person but not necessarily being judgmental themselves, as they have formed their opinion on empirical evidence and not just prejudice.

I realise what I have said makes little to no sense but I'm going for the sunk cost fallacy here and saying I've written it now so I'll post it.

Reply 6

Anonymous Coward

2

Original post by Viva Emptiness

I see what you're getting at, and obviously everyone makes snap judgments and such on a daily basis but I think you're being too literal.

Isn't it obvious that they mean they dislike people who are openly prejudiced and comment negatively on other peoples lifestyle with their opinions having no basis on fact or rationale? I think that's a perfectly legitimate person to dislike. Obviously the people who say this are making a "judgment" on that person but not necessarily being judgmental themselves, as they have formed their opinion on empirical evidence and not just prejudice.

I realise what I have said makes little to no sense but I'm going for the sunk cost fallacy here and saying I've written it now so I'll post it.

I was going to say this.

They don't mean it literally. By 'judgemental people' they mean people who act rashly on those quickly formed judgements (that we all make within seconds.)

It's one thing to judge someone in your head, and be open to having that judgement stripped.
But making that judgement, and then refusing to put it to one side, when it's been proven wrong, is another thing.

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 7

Katie_p

OP

15

Original post by Viva Emptiness

I see what you're getting at, and obviously everyone makes snap judgments and such on a daily basis but I think you're being too literal.

Isn't it obvious that they mean they dislike people who are openly prejudiced and comment negatively on other peoples lifestyle with their opinions having no basis on fact or rationale? I think that's a perfectly legitimate person to dislike. Obviously the people who say this are making a "judgment" on that person but not necessarily being judgmental themselves, as they have formed their opinion on empirical evidence and not just prejudice.

I realise what I have said makes little to no sense but I'm going for the sunk cost fallacy here and saying I've written it now so I'll post it.

I understand that they usually mean more than just the average person when they say "judgemental" but I have yet to see someone claim to hate judgemental people when a) the person they are accusing of being judgemental has NOT given a (passable, at least) explanation for their view OR b) they have followed up their claim with an equally unfounded judgement of the person they were criticising.

I don't think I have ever seen, irl or on the internet, somebody say "I hate judgemental people" in the sense of people with unfounded prejudices or negative attitudes which influence their actions and leave the situation without weakening their argument by exhibiting similar behaviour.

Edit: On the internet, as well, people are quick to accuse others of fitting the italicised definition of judgemental people, without knowing anywhere near enough about them to make that judgement. In real life it happens less frequently, but there are still plenty of people who will jump to the conclusion that I, for example, am homphobic (and by extension judgemental) for opposing gay marriage.
I am the first to admit that if somebody tells me their political views are opposite to mine, they are religious, or they are opposed to something that I consider it my right to do, I will not form a very positive view of them. But I would not call them "judegemental" if they announced any of these things to me, on the basis of that announcement alone. And in each of these situations, I will both afford them an opportunity to "redeem" themselves, and not treat them differently on my "negative" view of them unless I have significant further proof to confirm this view.

Original post by Anonymous Coward

QFA

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 8

superduper9

10

I think the phrase "I hate people who judge" carries a caveat .... it actually reads "I hate people who judge ..... but I'm allowed to judge everyone else!"

Reply 9

username927016

20

I hate overly judgmental people, it's human nature to at least judge people a little bit whether good or bad.

"I hate judgemental people"

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