Can you forgive drunken cheating?

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Zarek
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#21
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#21
Apparently you can get off with a drink driving ban if you can prove you were SO drunk you had no knowledge what you are doing. So the same must absolutely hold for infidelity.
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andrew2209
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#22
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(Original post by Zarek)
Apparently you can get off with a drink driving ban if you can prove you were SO drunk you had no knowledge what you are doing. So the same must absolutely hold for infidelity.
Really? That seems pretty odd, all the cases I've heard of people exceptionally over the limit result in punishment.

Also, how much do you have to drink to reach that point, and how on earth do you even figure out how to drive a car in that state?
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Zarek
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#23
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#23
(Original post by andrew2209)

Also, how much do you have to drink to reach that point, and how on earth do you even figure out how to drive a car in that state?
Thats the whole point behind this incredibly rare successful defence. Judge may have been an alcoholic too, mind..
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namename
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#24
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#24
(Original post by Anonymous)
This is just hypothetical, but if someone was blackout drunk and had absolutely 0 memory of it happening and cheated on their partner, do you think that's forgiveable?

I ask because there have been 2 occasions for me where I do not remember having sex with the guy AT ALL, completely blank, remember absolutely nothing for even the entire night... only ONE of these guys I would have actually slept with had I been less drunk. I'm not in a relationship btw. I was just thinking had this happened while in a relationship, obviously there would be pain and hurt and I'd really regret it and I'd assume there'd be more mental barriers against it happening... but is it excusable? Or at least understandable?

I know people who have done ridiculous things they would never ever do sober when they get this drunk. Maybe the urge is there do do it extremely deep down when sober but the losses weigh out the risks so they don't. People will always find other people attractive and maybe THINK about having sex with another person, especially in a very old relationship, but never actually do it. Alcohol just destroys those barriers?
Say "no" to alcohol.
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95skh
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#25
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#25
Cheating is black and white. In answer to the title of this thread, 'no'.
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bobdidies
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#26
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#26
not a chance. Unless you were spiked or something getting that drunk is something you were responsible for doing, you chose to drink those drinks, so equally you are responsible for your actions while drunk. You know yourself and you know how you act under the influence of alcohol so if you chose to get that drunk that you cheated on your partner its is your fault.
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sausageez
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#27
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#27
yeah, i'd be a bit meh but i'm sure i'd get over one case of the stupids, if it happens the second time though i'd rip him to bits!
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Lotus_Eater
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#28
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#28
I'm not sure I entirely believe in the example given. Personally I have never been that drunk that all issues of meaningful consent went out the window. Sure inhibitions get lost, also good judgement, but I would always consider myself responsible for what I do when drunk.

Ask me whether I would forgive my girlfriend if she did it though... do you know what, I just might. If she was seriously contrite, committed to never getting that drunk again, and gave me time to get over it, I could see myself forgiving her. It would be hard, and upsetting, but I wouldn't walk away from someone I wanted to spend my life with. At least not without a fight.

If, in the hypothetical example, it was someone I was less invested with, then I almost certainly would call time on the relationship.
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suzannataylor
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#29
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#29
To the people who think it's impossible to get so drunk you could forget sleeping with someone, you're wrong, it is possible. On perhaps two occasions I have been so drunk that I couldn't remember an entire evening, literally nothing and it never came back to me. I did sleep with someone on one of these occasions but I was single. I was pretty young though and it's never happened to me since.

I also think being drunk is a poor excuse for cheating, you always know what you're doing, unless it's a situation like I described above and in that case you really shouldn't be getting that drunk. But having said that, I would forgive a one night stand once. People **** up, I know I have, and deserve a second chance. If they mess up a second time or it was more serious than a one night stand then there's clearly something wrong.
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Michael3C
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#30
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If someone got drunk and cheated on me - they would be out of the door, no questions asked.

Alcohol is not an excuse. I've been drunk in relationships but it doesn't change who I am, or bring out darker aspects of my personality. If alcohol was capable of bringing a darker aspect out of someone, that potential was always in them to begin with.
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Hal.E.Lujah
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#31
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#31
I'd definitely be able to forgive it.
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Rum Ham
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#32
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#32
Personally no because I don't see being drunk as an excuse to cheat. I see it as just giving you the balls to do something you want to do while sober but didn't have the nerve to do.
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suzannataylor
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#33
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(Original post by Yasmin25)
Personally no because I don't see being drunk as an excuse to cheat. I see it as just giving you the balls to do something you want to do while sober but didn't have the nerve to do.
I don't really agree with you. People do a lot of stuff drunk that they wouldn't want to do sober. I don't think cheating when you're drunk necessarily means you were desperate to go out and shag someone earlier in the day when you were sober, it means your drunken brain thought it was a good idea at the time and you were more susceptible to temptation and silly enough not to give yourself a reality check. Some people will never ever cheat, but the reality is that even in the best relationship you're gonna find other people attractive and some people will give in to that. I'm not justifying it, cheating almost always hurts everyone involved.
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dbonnie50
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#34
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#34
your a mug for getting drunk in ythe first place...
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digitalangel18
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#35
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(Original post by Anonymous)
This is just hypothetical, but if someone was blackout drunk and had absolutely 0 memory of it happening and cheated on their partner, do you think that's forgiveable?
Most people (including myself) have had a drunken one night stand that they can't even remember, but if someone cheated on me, drunk or sober I wouldn't forgive them. It would be on the back of my mind and they could easily do it again so why invest my time in someone that messes me about.
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Final Fantasy
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#36
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#36
No. Unless it's a matter of life and death.
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jacintagraham96
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#37
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#37
can i ask if she asks, after anonymously for help is it, OKAY for them to by there partner asking for help?
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theaflores21
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#38
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#38
What if your lover told you after a lot **** and everything is going good then what like if he wasnt in his right mind set like i need some help ya'll??
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ralla22
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#39
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#39
my girlfriend was drunk and fell asleep and a guy had sex with her but she woke up and didn’t have enough energy to stop it what should i do
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Anonymous #2
#40
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#40
my girlfriend fell asleep drunk and was extremely tired at her friends house and she was woken up to a guy having sex with her but she tried to push him off twice and said she had a boyfriend but couldn’t push him off again so she just let it happen what do i do ?
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