I don't want to go out anymore!

What's wrong with me? Every time my friends ask me if I want to go out to a club or something I make some excuse even if I'm free. I'd just rather stay in on my own. It's not that I'm antisocial, because I used to love going out and used to be out every weekend. I'm a bit worried that I won't be able to keep up with everyone at uni in terms of partying and freshers week cos all I seem to want to do is stay in, cos I feel fat and ugly. What do I do?

Reply 1

Gem

14

Some people just don't like going out! I'm sure you'll find people at Uni who are the same as you, you could maybe join some clubs and stuff :smile:

If it's just that you can't be bothered to go out (and we all get like that sometimes!) it could be an idea to really push yourself into going - you might have more fun than you expect :smile:

Don't worry though, just be yourself, don't be someone you're not :smile:

Reply 2

username47781

20

don't worry i'm like that alot i used to get a lot of offers to go out but i just did not want to, as Gem says maybe find a club you like and join it.

Reply 3

Elements

13

;console; It sounds like you need to boost your self-confidence and self-esteem. There are books with exercises etc for these things and if you talk to your friends too then they could give you the support and confidence booster that you need. Maybe you could work on your image and your perceptions too. A useful exercise is to write or say a list of all the things that you are but all in the positive: "I am + positive comment".

Reply 4

randum_nandom

dont worry i'm like that and eveyone tells me that i should get out more but i would rather be at home, next time if your free just go and you'll enjoy dont worry lol

Reply 5

louieb

I used to be like that but now I'm the opposite because I go out with different people that are really fun to be with. I'm sure when you go to uni you'll meet some people more like yourself that you have more in common with so don't worry about it. Don't feel down about it, if you don't feel like goin out, don't! It's up to you how you relax and enjoy yourself!

Reply 6

kennyboy

First off, you say that you dont go out cause you feel fat and ugly. When you get to uni, this will be the last of your worries! At univeristy, if no where else, it doesnt matter who you are, or what you think of yourself. Most often knowone knows you anyway, and so you have the best chance at a freshstart. Regardless of shape size race colour or interests, people will IMMEDIATELY accept you, because you have something in common straight away, you'l be a student! There are so many opportuniteis while at university that you just be yourself and people love you.

As for not wanting to go out now, its possibly a worry thing. Your worried about university, and this is effecting your motivation. Instead of going out with lots of people, ease yourself back into the social circles by going out just for a quick drink with one or 2 mates, and build up slowely. Even if you dont stay out for long, the company will feel great and this will get you back onto the right track for going out for longer periods with larger groups. Get the confidence back.

On the other hand, there is nothing seriously wrong with just staying at home, but you sound like your at a stage in yourlife where a strong social circle is important. Stay at home or go out, either way, just do what you're comfortable with! Your the most important person in all this :biggrin:

Reply 7

Anthonyjm71

9

yeah If you feel that you want to go then do it , you dont know what you might be missing out on ,if you always stay in each week.If you don't feel like then. Its best to stay in until you , feel more like going out again.

Reply 8

Rooftopcowboy

12

kennyboy

First off, you say that you dont go out cause you feel fat and ugly. When you get to uni, this will be the last of your worries! At univeristy, if no where else, it doesnt matter who you are, or what you think of yourself. Most often knowone knows you anyway, and so you have the best chance at a freshstart. Regardless of shape size race colour or interests, people will IMMEDIATELY accept you, because you have something in common straight away, you'l be a student! There are so many opportuniteis while at university that you just be yourself and people love you.

As for not wanting to go out now, its possibly a worry thing. Your worried about university, and this is effecting your motivation. Instead of going out with lots of people, ease yourself back into the social circles by going out just for a quick drink with one or 2 mates, and build up slowely. Even if you dont stay out for long, the company will feel great and this will get you back onto the right track for going out for longer periods with larger groups. Get the confidence back.

On the other hand, there is nothing seriously wrong with just staying at home, but you sound like your at a stage in yourlife where a strong social circle is important. Stay at home or go out, either way, just do what you're comfortable with! Your the most important person in all this :biggrin:

great post: seriously..you can do just about anything at uni and nobody will bat an eyelid, its far more mature and 'laidback' than any situation youll have been in before.

i have some weeks where i dont feel like going out, i think everyone does. Though with me, its more of a "not wanting to go because we've been to the same club weeks in a row" or not wanting to go as "freind wants to go to a club where i dont like the music, for the 2nd week in a row (when youve been kind and 'put up with it' once already" kind of thing..not a lack of confience issue or anything like that.

I don't want to go out anymore!

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