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Can't get over 'ex'?
Well, ex is a little exaggerated. Basically I fell in love with a girl 2 years above me at school in oct 2003 on a trip abroad and I messed things up completely and it was so clear she didn't feel the same, but she thought friends was cool, so i was content with that, but I almost became obssessed with her, like I always HAD to see her and got paranoid when she didn't reply to texts, emails etc- though i didn't send them often.
And sometimes when i'd see her we got on really well and I thought, ah, at least we;re good friends. Then she left school last summer to go on GAP year and we said we'd stay in touch but she never contacted me again. I had a really miserable summer because I couldn't get over her, and this dragged on to the autumn.
Only was it untill Christmas I finally thought I was over her, and since then I haven't really thought about her much and have been interested in other girls, however recently I've dreamnt about her and all the emotions about her have come back and it's really annoying me and getting me down. Does anyone have any suggestions about how to REALLY get rid of her in my mind for good?
Thing is, we had quite a lot in common so my interests were similar to hers and I ended up doing a lot of the things she did (academic wise etc.) and i'm still at the same school- for 1 more year and do some of the same subjects, am thinking of a few of the same unis she applied to- like there's always something that I can link back to her. This annoys me a lot. Yet also there's a part of me that wants to go back to these thoughts because at one point they were nice and I felt good. Now they make me feel sad.
So I can't do anything drastic as yet, but any ideas about getting her out of my mind would be useful. Right now I can't really get out much- no money and i live in the middle of nowhere. I was thinking of going shopping or something, but with my non existant money....
any thoughts?
And sometimes when i'd see her we got on really well and I thought, ah, at least we;re good friends. Then she left school last summer to go on GAP year and we said we'd stay in touch but she never contacted me again. I had a really miserable summer because I couldn't get over her, and this dragged on to the autumn.
Only was it untill Christmas I finally thought I was over her, and since then I haven't really thought about her much and have been interested in other girls, however recently I've dreamnt about her and all the emotions about her have come back and it's really annoying me and getting me down. Does anyone have any suggestions about how to REALLY get rid of her in my mind for good?
Thing is, we had quite a lot in common so my interests were similar to hers and I ended up doing a lot of the things she did (academic wise etc.) and i'm still at the same school- for 1 more year and do some of the same subjects, am thinking of a few of the same unis she applied to- like there's always something that I can link back to her. This annoys me a lot. Yet also there's a part of me that wants to go back to these thoughts because at one point they were nice and I felt good. Now they make me feel sad.
So I can't do anything drastic as yet, but any ideas about getting her out of my mind would be useful. Right now I can't really get out much- no money and i live in the middle of nowhere. I was thinking of going shopping or something, but with my non existant money....
any thoughts?
Reply 2
Bekaboo
Have you had a girlfriend or anything in between? I often find you only completley move on when you fall for someone else
As I think it was Elles once said:
The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else
As I think it was Elles once said:
The best way to get over someone is to get under someone else
Nope. Not really, I;ve had a few things where I thought i had fallen for them. But I'm becoming really disillusioned with romance now, yet i crave it at the same time. I don't think there's anyway of meeting anypne else yet as I'm still at school and going out, as i said is nigh on impossible.
Reply 3
i find that whenever i dream about someone, its never actually anything like them, though it seems so in the dream. you probably have a " not quite so accurate" picture of her in your mind which was projected in your dream, and yet is ( you should remind yourself) nothing like her.
perhaps, harsh as it may seem, write down her "cons"......i don't know.
but another girlfriend would be a good way forward i think.
its difficult but i think that understanding that the dream is just a dream and that its only an image of how you saw her (when you were, as you said, "obsessed") not a true reflection of her person.
perhaps, harsh as it may seem, write down her "cons"......i don't know.
but another girlfriend would be a good way forward i think.
its difficult but i think that understanding that the dream is just a dream and that its only an image of how you saw her (when you were, as you said, "obsessed") not a true reflection of her person.
Reply 4
Anonymous
i find that whenever i dream about someone, its never actually anything like them, though it seems so in the dream. you probably have a " not quite so accurate" picture of her in your mind which was projected in your dream, and yet is ( you should remind yourself) nothing like her.
perhaps, harsh as it may seem, write down her "cons"......i don't know.
but another girlfriend would be a good way forward i think.
its difficult but i think that understanding that the dream is just a dream and that its only an image of how you saw her (when you were, as you said, "obsessed") not a true reflection of her person.
perhaps, harsh as it may seem, write down her "cons"......i don't know.
but another girlfriend would be a good way forward i think.
its difficult but i think that understanding that the dream is just a dream and that its only an image of how you saw her (when you were, as you said, "obsessed") not a true reflection of her person.
she was a right cow to me i know that. but that was part of the attraction, though those 2 years were for a lot of it really crap. i did make a list last summer and it helped yeah. but surely you're always a victim of you emotions for someone if the only way to get over them is to fall for someone else- because it's going to happen again, and again.
Reply 5
..continueing from last post...
*is a good way to go.
*is a good way to go.
Reply 6
no going from relationship to relationship just to get over the previous one is a not good imo.
you should sort yourself out before entering another relationship. not just use the relationship to get over it
you should sort yourself out before entering another relationship. not just use the relationship to get over it
Reply 7
wow now i sound hypocritical, i mean being interested in other people is a good thing but starting a relationship properly until you're over it is not.
Reply 8
i hate to sound stupid but alcohol does help; trust me,especially when your with people who care for you like mates etc.. just try and go out, do things that tottaly take your mind of her
Reply 9
not in the long term
Reply 10
yeah its fine. i'm worrying over nothing. i plan to do just that tctc.
Reply 11
Anonymous
Nope. Not really, I;ve had a few things where I thought i had fallen for them. But I'm becoming really disillusioned with romance now, yet i crave it at the same time. I don't think there's anyway of meeting anypne else yet as I'm still at school and going out, as i said is nigh on impossible.
Ever had a girlfriend at all?
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