How Do You Defriend Someone?

To be honest, any time you have him on his own would be enough. Say you're really fond of him at times when he's nice, but there are also times he makes you feel rubbish. Not sure how to stop him staring. Of course, you could mention it, but it might not work.. can't really stop people looking.

Thanks Erm, are you sure saying that would work? It seems like a fairly diplomatic way to approach things, he definitely has a mean streak though so I don't want to let him to know he's gotten to me by making me feel rubbish at times, if you see what I mean. I'd rather just let him know I disapprove of his behaviour without saying I've been hurt.

I reckon being really firm and blunt about him staring might work, and then just glaring back at him every time I catch him doing it (he is really OTT about it) what do you reckon?

Nope, I'm not sure at all. But you can't go on the way you are, because it's winding you up - so you have to try something! However you word it, let him know you're not happy.

Thanks, great reply - + repped Yes, I'll try calling him out on this from now on, I am usually a lot more forward about things but I've tried to be diplomatic here as some old mutual friends are involved and I didn't want to make things awkward There's a slight problem in that the friends I see him around are usually closer to him than mine (his group of "best mates," but not mine) but if they can't see what he does (it's so obvious sometimes!) that's not really my problem IMO.

Do you reckon I should call him out when he's staring at me too? (I have a suspicion this may be another passive aggressive mind game). I don't know if I mentioned it in my OP but he does it all the time? He just looks at me with a blank expression, and then when I look up/catch him doing it he'll either jump and look guilty and turn away (after which I can see him do it again out of the corner of my eye once I start watching him!) or look blankly back at me even when I smile to try to make the situation less awkward. I don't want to come across as overreacting in front of friends, but it is rather noticeable. I'm not sure if he does it because he's fairly quiet/introverted.

Just because he is with friends who are closer to him than you, does not mean that they will not confront him, if anything, they may be more comfortable in doing so.

With regards to the staring, I hate what I'm about to say....ignore it. If it is pissing you off to the point of no return, literally again "I KNOW I'M BEAUTIFUL, BUT DO YOU HAVE TO STARE AT ME SO MUCH?" or maybe something like "WHY DO YOU HAVE THE CREEPY LOOK ON YOUR FACE? " or "DID YOU WANT SOMETHING? no. THEN STOP STARING AT ME...JHEEEZ" or just "DO YOU MIND, YOUR STARING IS PUTTING ME OFF".

There's loads of ways you can call him out on it, but I would just ignore him since staring isn't really doing too much to you personally.

Well, they're all guys and the sort of guys who think this kind of thing is acceptable/funny I'm no longer close with one of them, as he's really nice to me personally but does some stupid stuff (he went and groped some random girl in a nightclub once without asking for permission, the girl's boyfriend chased him out and got a picture of him and hunted him down on Facebook!). They're just that kind of people, I'm trying to distance myself from them a bit generally

I'll try ignoring thanks It just irks me because I don't want him to get off/take pleasure in my appearance TBH, after he's treated me like ****

Do you ever think that maybe you should change this circle of friends? It's not the best type of people to be associated with, especially if you don't do these things that they do. They seem like the type to have some harmless fun, then crap happens to them and they're like "oopps". If there's anyway that you can maybe just stick to the girls and only really hang out with these boys if you must.

Thanks Do you reckon all out ignoring him (as in, not even saying hi back/being civil) would work? He's quite cowardly so maybe if I did that he'd get the hint and just go away

Well what would your reaction be if someone did the same to you?

It's actually that simple. Stop talking to him.

What was impolite about what I said? In the olden days, didn't people solve their problems without asking for opinions from an online audience?

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