The Student Room Group

Why do people have to change?! :(

Please read this as I cant stop thinking about how everything has changed so much. Its scary.

Well, recently I was thinking... I used to have so many good friends who were fantastic people and who I felt I could really trust but over the years they all changed for the worse.
One of my friends used to be a laugh but she turned into such a manipulative, controlling attention seeker. I met her in year 7 and she wasnt that bad then, but by year 11 she was awful and so nasty. She used to do the worst things and tell some really bad lies (ie "my mum is dying from cancer" - which wasnt true) and I cant understand why. In the 6th form we both went to, she went out of her way to make my life a misery, spreading rumours about me and trying to turn all the new friends I'd made against me. She also used all my insecurities against me. For example, ive been anorexic and recently she actually took old photos into school of me in yr 7, before the eating disorder started, and got people to comment on how fat I looked in them.

I started talking to another (ex)-good friend of mine in year 9. We were both having a bad time with our home life and as we were going through similar things, we found comfort in talking to eachother. I confided so much in her and I really thought I could trust her. But when we started 6th form everything changed. Ironically she made friends with my first friend - the nasty attention seeker - and now shes nothing like she was. Shes bitchy and rude about me, ignores me when she sees me, sleeps around and just gets drunk all the time. She used to be so caring and intelligent and its all gone now. I dont know her anymore.

Its depressing really, as I felt so close to the 2nd friend and I miss her. And now shes friends with the other girl I knew and as a result, has changed completely. And the 1st girl loves rubbing it in my face. At 6th form, she talks loudly about how much fun they had at the weekend and they basically do a very OTT hug and look to see if I've seen it. I feel like the 1st girl made friends with my old friend to spite me, as I remember she used to bitch about her and even commented on her when she first walked in on the 1st day of 6th form (i think she said something like "oh, look whats been dragged in"...)

I know I should forget about it, but Ive lost a good friend in the 2nd girl and I really wish things were like they were a few years ago. Why do people have to change for the worse? Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Or can anyone offer some advice?
Reply 1
wow that realy does suck. have you done something to offend number 1?
you realy dont want to be wasting your time with people like that. id leave them to their little games anyone whos going to act like that are most definatly your friends. ignore and move on from them
Reply 2
With number 1, everyone got sick of her lies and manipulative games so I gradually stopped speaking to her along with most of her old friends from secondary school. I didnt really do anything to offend her but I think she knew that I was tired of her behaviour
Thanks for the advice
Reply 3
It happens, and it sucks ...It has certianly happened to me, When I was 12 I had two really good friends and we would meet up every weekend, and talk loads, we even went on holiday together. Now Im in 6th form and I see very little of them, I know I havnt changed, ive noticed they have too, its sad now because i dont have any really good friends.
Bah, trust me, everyone gets ****ty friends like that. :rolleyes: Just be glad you were friends with them while they were nice, and that you're not friends with complete bitches, like they both are with each other. (Feel free to read that twice. :biggrin:)
Reply 5
Anonymous
With number 1, everyone got sick of her lies and manipulative games so I gradually stopped speaking to her along with most of her old friends from secondary school. I didnt really do anything to offend her but I think she knew that I was tired of her behaviour
Thanks for the advice

so realy shes competing for your attention and trying to make you jealus by befrieding number 2. all imo
Reply 6
Hmm thats interesting, you could be right. She does stare at me a lot for no reason (Ive always taken it as shes trying to intimidate me). When i think about it, she has no other real friends apart from this girl and shes always trying to get friendly with people shes knows Im friendly with.
But meh, Im sick of her. She makes me unhappy.
Reply 7
so dont bother with her any more. if she says anything in future smile sweetly, say: thats nice, and walk away :biggrin:
Anonymous
Hmm thats interesting, you could be right. She does stare at me a lot for no reason (Ive always taken it as shes trying to intimidate me). When i think about it, she has no other real friends apart from this girl and shes always trying to get friendly with people shes knows Im friendly with.
But meh, Im sick of her. She makes me unhappy.

Then make her unhappy: don't react to her attempts to piss you off.
one thing that winds me up in particular is groups of girls who have known each other since school then stay in this cliche even when they are 20 and dont invite anyone else in or let anyone else in im having this problem with a certain group of 'friends' im posting anon cos i think a few of these girls use tsr so dont want to lose them completely
Reply 10
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Reply 11
Change is good.
Reply 12
Just be glad you realise what there really like now.