Very long-distance relationship

This summer I met an amazing girl on a summer programme at my university in England. I was helping out with the organization of things and she was visiting from the US. We ended up having an amazing four weeks, and have fallen in love with one another. She had a boyfriend but will finish things on returning. She says all she wants is to have a relationship and I feel the same. However, I'm in England for another year at least and she has another two years before grad school.

As students, we obviously cannot make trips back and forth for academic and financial reasons. I am visiting in early September and she'll be coming back to the UK over Christmas. Is a few weeks here and there enough to sustain a relationship for a year? Also, can anyone recommend the best/ cheapest phone cards to use?

Reply 1

Glory

1

It wasnt for me, but it depends how much effort you put in is how much relationship you get out. I am a little concerned about her already seeing someone, isn't a good sign for a long distance relationship. Since if she has cheated with you whats to stop her meeting someone else on those lonely nights away from you

Reply 2

username47781

20

yeah i agree with glory on this, if she truely wanted to go out with you she would dump her boyfriend, i mean what will stop her crawling back to him when you go back.

Reply 3

bret

OP

12

That's not going to happen. She's finishing with him as soon as she gets back. She didn't want to do it over the phone. We are truely in love and are willing to put the effort in. It's just knowing how logistically possible it is.

Reply 4

Glory

1

bret

That's not going to happen. She's finishing with him as soon as she gets back. She didn't want to do it over the phone. We are truely in love and are willing to put the effort in. It's just knowing how logistically possible it is.

i hope the confidence you have with her is well placed. Distance has a habit of making minor problems become extremely large.

Reply 5

username47781

20

again agree with glory she can say she will dump her boyfriend but how many of them actually do.

Reply 6

Glory

1

before you get the wrong idea, im not totally against long distance relationships. My sister's best mate married his now wife who is american last summer, they make a great couple.

But my experience of a long distance relationship was the other end of the scale, jeliously ended up forming the basis of the reason i broke up with one of my ex's. The distance puts doubts in peoples mind, and they start questioning how easy your girlfriend could move on. Although i didn't stray the accusations and doubts, made me unhappy and decide long distance relationships isn't for me.

Reply 7

username47781

20

Glory

before you get the wrong idea, im not totally against long distance relationships. My sister's best mate married his now wife who is american last summer, they make a great couple.

But my experience of a long distance relationship was the other end of the scale, jeliously ended up forming the basis of the reason i broke up with one of my ex's. The distance puts doubts in peoples mind, and they start questioning how easy your girlfriend could move on. Although i didn't stray the accusations and doubts, made me unhappy and decide long distance relationships isn't for me.

no course i agree with that i'm not against long distance relationships, in fact although my girlfriend lived near me, for 2 years she was away at University some 150 miles away, but we survived and franky the thought of either of us straying well the thought never even crossed our minds.

But there are people who simply can't cope with a long distance through no fault of their own.

However in this situation we got here the girl he's after is already taken although she is coming back to the UK, it only spells trouble even if she said she will dump him, the big question is will she actually do it, or will she lie about dumping her boyfriend and carry on seeing him when she goes back to America.

Reply 8

xemilyx

2

What is the garantee of her coming back to the UK? And how do you know that when you go to America in September? The thing is, 4 Weeks is a very short time to fall in love. You seem to have a lot of faith and belief in her, but I agree with what Glory and Carl1982 have said, what is the garantee that she won't cheat on you when she is back in America? I know that breaking up with someone over the phone is crappy, but if she was truly in love with you, then maybe she would have mention meeting someone and getting close to them. Is she in contact with him? Does she E-mail him etc. on a regular basis?
I personally don't have anything wrong with long distance relationships, because I am involved in one, and I love him so much, but this girl seems to be very indecisive in what she wants, and by not breaking up with this boyfriend until she is home seems like she is keeping her options open. Just be careful, you don't want to end up with a broken heart.

Very long-distance relationship

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