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My friends are all so shallow

I've actually found myself avoiding a lot of my friends these summer holz simply because spending time with them is so tedious. They're so shallow, all the conversations are centered around stupid trivial stuff like nights out and weight and appearance. I don't mind talking about stuff like that, but that's ALL they seem to talk about. I feel like I could never have a deep conversation with them or discuss meaningful issues. It's really getting me down. Do you reckon this is likely to improve when I go to uni or am I just being stupid?

Reply 1

djmm

15

You avoid your friends? You mean you avoid the people who you are associated with? Friends are people you don't avoid. When you eff off to Univ - it might change, unless of course - they eff off to the same Univ. But then, you could always ignore them there too.

Reply 2

Joshytoohotty

That's the bulk of what I talk about to be fair...

Reply 3

chocmonster

1

Anonymous

I've actually found myself avoiding a lot of my friends these summer holz simply because spending time with them is so tedious. They're so shallow, all the conversations are centered around stupid trivial stuff like nights out and weight and appearance. I don't mind talking about stuff like that, but that's ALL they seem to talk about. I feel like I could never have a deep conversation with them or discuss meaningful issues. It's really getting me down. Do you reckon this is likely to improve when I go to uni or am I just being stupid?

i find it quite surprising that its like this before you get to uni...as in my case you'll probably find that your relationship with them will change after going to uni(maybe for the better, or maybe worse) and you'll be closer to people who you weren't close with before

i still enjoy hanging out with all of my friends..its just different now

Reply 4

tomHHHH

thats because thats what most people talk about.

unless your going to like cambridge i would of thought thats what people will talk about at uni

Reply 5

poltroon

Join a bookclub.

Reply 6

rachelrainbow32

2

Yep my conversations are pretty much centered around these things too.

Reply 7

Clarence

14

tomHHHH

thats because thats what most people talk about.

unless your going to like cambridge i would of thought thats what people will talk about at uni

Thats a very narrow minded way of thinking

Reply 8

erk

14

tomHHHH

thats because thats what most people talk about.

unless your going to like cambridge i would of thought thats what people will talk about at uni

i can't say ive had many conversations relating to clothes and weight.

alot revolve around nights out, but that's because we go on many nights out, so it's a big part of our lives.

oh, and i dont go to cambridge.

Reply 9

Anthonyjm71

9

The friends l've got are either creepy or weird l've got two friends that work in Supermarkets both are real such decent people both suffer with speach problems.Still thats know reason not to talk to them. They're quite fine to talk to, my third friend is so creepy and weird and works with plants.He gives me the creep when l was on holiday l was so glad that l stayed on when he went home.I even came back to the place l was stay , because of my job situation which was great did find it a bit lonely without my Waitrose friend though still had an amazing hoilday though.I need to find some more normal friends.

Reply 10

Sithius

16

tomHHHH

thats because thats what most people talk about.

unless your going to like cambridge i would of thought thats what people will talk about at uni

I talk about a hell of a lot more then those things said... oh wait no I don't go to cambridge uni so I must talk about weight etc. Oh sorry I am wrong you are right.

:rolleyes:

Reply 11

tomHHHH

I said most, not all and its true

Reply 12

InsertName

2

Sounds like you've seen the light and have matured a bit faster than they are. People change, you can't expect to always have common interests with people for ever

Reply 13

nic88

2

you could join a society that you know will include many people who are interested in the same things as you. if you go to uni you could set up a debating society where you can have the chance to discuss deeper issues and things. hopefully you will get lots of friends this way

Reply 14

Chewwy

17

meh, the other extreme is pretty bad too. i just left my friends the other day, after they'd been arguing for over an hour on existentialism.

Reply 15

That artistic one

1

i hate it when people talk about appearance and stuff of a similar nature, it bores me to death. plus there is more to life than those things.

Reply 16

hjfghjv

I'd say do avoid them and look for less shallow people to be friends with when you get to Uni. I can't stand those sorts of people, I knew loads of them at school (going to quite a posh all-girls school) yet when I left and went to college I met some great people that weren't shallow in the slightest. And I don't mean really seriously unnecessarily deep that only talk about boring ****, the kind that you can just mess about with sometimes but have a deep convo with other times, they're the best kind. At least at Uni there'll be thousands of new people to meet so you're bound to make a lot of 'deeper' friends.

Reply 17

Anonymous #2

totally relate with the original poster. im in the same situation. are you a capricorn by any chance? mine is a greater problem...firsly i dont enjoy the shallow talks at all. They are just a necessity when talking to some people. secondly, i prefer not to call people like that 'friends' caus i have a more high regard for friendship and the status of a friend in my life. so im stuck basically. and by shallow i dont mean simply discussing appearance but extensive unnecessary gossip mainly based around gfs/bfs/etc. which is stupid really.

Reply 18

lou p lou

2

whereas it's really deep to bitch about them on a forum to people who don't know them... seriously listen to yourselves... these are you friends and the people you're supposedly meant to care about

lou xxx

Reply 19

Gem

14

Sad as it seems, sometimes we 'out grow' our friends. Sometimes we just mature and develop different interests. For example, I'm pretty much the only one out of my original group of school mates who went to Uni, the rest are either married or living with someone, they're in pretty much dead end jobs BUT they're happy so that's the main thing. Whilst I care about them as much as I used to when we were at school, and I'm sure they care about me just as much, we have nothing in common any more, and as sad as it is, we'll probably never be as close as we used to be.

I guess you've just got to move on and get on with it. Uni is a whole new life and you're bound to find people the same as you and end up having the best 3 years of your life :smile:

My friends are all so shallow

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