Leaving boyfriend at home

Hey all, this is my 1st post so please be gentle!
Im off to uni in 5weeks ahhhh and my bloke is staying here. My first choice is Sheffield and insurance is Coventry and I currently live in Derby. My boyfriend is going to go to Derby uni to do an access course for one year while im beginning a 3year geography course and i really dont know what to do. My parents presume im going to dump him but i dont see why the distance should make a difference. Has anyone already at uni got an old relationship thats still working despite the distance? Ive also been warned that its better to go single and do it alone, what dya reckon?
Ta xxx

Reply 1

HeStoleMyCrayon

it'd be better to go single if you wanna go out and get laid by a variety of different random folk, but if you love him and wanna stay with him then go for it, just ignore what everyone else says coz everyone is different. if u wanna stay with him and try make it work, then dont let anyone put you off and good luck to you.

Reply 2

matt bass

Ive got every intention of staying with my gf while im in Birmingham and shes in Oxford. If you two want it to work then stay together.

Reply 3

leah_0600

damn right, you might aswel give it a shot! If you're both meant to be together, it'll happen

Reply 4

hitmanuk2k

These threads are so boring. There must be at least 20 of these a week. All have the same answer... it's entirely up to the individuals involved.

Reply 5

wowogem

OP

Iv just told you its my 1st ever post, cheers for the support, i wont bother reading your boring posts in future

Reply 6

Trog

Yeah i guess these threads are boring if you're not in that situation yourself, but i am, and i actually find it comforting to hear from people in the same position. Got an offer to do Spanish & Arabic at Oxford if i get the grades, but my boyfriend is stopping at home (three hrs away by train) to finish his B-Tec. Add to that the fact that the second year of my course will be spent in the Middle East somewhere. Ouch. Still, my as well have a bash at makin it work, who knows

Reply 7

JollyJo

shouldn't be a problem as long as you want to stay together. i go to lancaster uni and my fella lives in leicester. thats around 200 miles, or a three hour drive. don't worry!! :smile:

Reply 8

That artistic one

1

hitmanuk2k

These threads are so boring. There must be at least 20 of these a week. All have the same answer... it's entirely up to the individuals involved.

don't read them then!

Reply 9

leah_0600

Trog

Yeah i guess these threads are boring if you're not in that situation yourself, but i am, and i actually find it comforting to hear from people in the same position. Got an offer to do Spanish & Arabic at Oxford if i get the grades, but my boyfriend is stopping at home (three hrs away by train) to finish his B-Tec. Add to that the fact that the second year of my course will be spent in the Middle East somewhere. Ouch. Still, my as well have a bash at makin it work, who knows

Ditto, i'm in the same boat as you. Boyfriend is going to Oxford, i'm studying a 4 year language course in Leeds (a long way away from oxford :frown:

) and will be spending a year abroad. We've been together nearly two years now so i'm hoping that's going to help.

Oh well, good look to everyone in the same situation!

Reply 10

HeStoleMyCrayon

i've heard loads of people talking about how once they get to uni they'll be tempted to get it on with a load of different people, coz uni is about drinking and sex with the occasional study, but if you're not into that and you are commited to your bf or gf then there shouldnt be any worries. it's not like once you go to uni youre forced to find other people, great times and life experiences can easily happen with a group of friends without anything else being on the table. and then when you hook up with ur bf or gf you'll have loads to talk about, so convos wont get boring easily. and a few hours away isnt much, just think positively about it and dont feel like your missing out when you see friends getting laid, coz if you love ur partner then u have more than a quick sexual fix

Reply 11

zav

14

Loads of girls i have know in long term relationships have gone off and cheated on there bf's with random guys they meet getting carried away with being somewhere new. There are a few that stay together and genrally work really well but it is difficult and it depends if you want to put the effort in or not. I am going to study at Loughborough and my gf in Bristol and we are still talking about it. I think it depends how much you both want it to work and how well you are suited.

Reply 12

username47781

20

Derby aint far from Sheffield, yeah if you love each other then you will surivive, my girlfriend was 150 miles away funny enough at sheffield university for 2 years but we survived.

Reply 13

bunthulhu

14

Well my boyfriend is going to Bath and I'm going to either Southmpton (fingers croooossssseed) or Aberystwyth, the latter being considerably further away :frown:

But we've been together for 2 years (anniversary this coming monday :biggrin:

) so we're gunna make it work, we're going to spend every other weekend (friday to sunday) together :smile:

And the holidays are long too, so I can see him loads then :smile:

Reply 14

lou p lou

2

my bf is at lancaster and i'm at dundee... we went to uni having no idea how things would work out (we'd only been together 7 months then) but were like you and didn't think the distance was enough to split up. we've just finished 2nd year now and yes it is hard and times it's awful it's still totally worth it

lou xxx

Reply 15

lilac!!

15

first of all i've got a long distabce realtionship for about 8 months and we are doing fine lol
dont worry it will be cool but most times people ive known just dump there bf's

Reply 16

Purple

18

If you love each other you will be fine, plus university years are generally only 30 weeks. Sheffield is only an hour away from Derby and depending on the course you are doing and the timetable you could easily go and visit him on Friday afternoon and stay to Sunday night/Monday morning.

Reply 17

mousey

2

I've just finished my first year at Nottingham with my boyfriend in Durham, sometimes it completely sucked but it's worth it. His third year is in France so that will be harder if we get that far, i jsut try to take it 1 day at a time though. xx

Reply 18

lou p lou

2

i wish there was some way that i could guarentee that my bf and i would still feel the same way in 5 years or something and then we could both just be single for uni and do our own thing and then settle down... be much less hassle (although i'd miss him lots so maybe it wouldn't work...)

lou xxx

Reply 19

Sazarina88

11

I'm off to Keele University hopefully in September, leaving my boyfriend of over 2 years at Loughborough University. Not far away really, an hour or so in the car.

We've discussed things and have decided we will see how things can go. We've accepted that it will probably be very difficult at times and that we may have to call things to an end but we're willing to try and see how things go and I think that's all you can do really.

Good luck
Sarah xx

Leaving boyfriend at home

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