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A Question for the Men-Folk

Scenario:

There's a boy and a girl. The boy is lovely, and very shy. The girl is gorgeous, and wants to be chased by men. Her ex is a psycho who chases her to get her back.

One night at a party, the girl's friend tries to get her to start talking to this boy. She won't, and practically ignores him most of the night. The girl's friend makes conversation with said boy, not because she likes him, but because she is friendly and wants to find out what he is like (ie. to check he is good enough for her friend). They spend a bit of time talking, the girl's friend is nice, sociable, intelligent, and makes him laugh. But she is not as gorgeous as her friend.

Why is it, that at the end of the night, the boy still likes the gorgeous girl who has pretty much ignored him for 5 hours? I stress, the girl's friend does not wish to go out with the boy, but she is left wondering about the mysteries of men.

Reply 1

NotoriousMIC

its called being shallow

Reply 2

tehjonny

8

Your the girls friend aren't you.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

OP

^ Duh

Reply 4

NotoriousMIC

tehjonny

Your the girls friend aren't you.

i think your right there

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

Just to point out, I don't like the guy, I'm involved with someone else, but this happens to me all the time - no matter how great a conversation I can have with someone, they will always go for my friend if they meet her too.

Reply 6

matt@internet

12

Mabye your friend has something you don't. Now why would you be asking this if you don't have feelings for him?

Reply 7

Sheen

11

matt@internet

Mabye your friend has something you don't. Now why would you be asking this if you don't have feelings for him?

yeah! maybe she does have feelings for him but hasnt realised yet

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

OP

matt@internet

Mabye your friend has something you don't.

Now that's the bit that makes me depressed, because what am I supposed to do about that?

Now why would you be asking this if you don't have feelings for him?

I know it's hard to believe, and I know I opened myself up for that question when I posted the thread, but I don't, scouts honour. The friend in question has actually gone back to her ex now (the one that chased her, she likes to be chased, and this boy just didn't make any moves really!), and I certainly won't be asking this guy out, am quite content with my own. My question is basically, why didn't he like me instead? I'm asking because this has happened to me several times now, once with a guy I really did like. Is it something about men, or is it something about me? (I'm pretty sure I never come across as desperate either, I'm just quite good at socialising and talking to people.)

Reply 9

NotoriousMIC

are you good looking?

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

OP

^ Have been told so. Not as good looking as my friend though.

Reply 11

Jonatan

13

Anonymous

Just to point out, I don't like the guy, I'm involved with someone else, but this happens to me all the time - no matter how great a conversation I can have with someone, they will always go for my friend if they meet her too.

Would you prefer it if the guys who went for you didn't give a damn about the conversation ? You're not really at a loss the way I see it.

Reply 12

Chumbaniya

17

Oh come on... do you expect attraction to work in a logical, easy to understand way?

Reply 13

NotoriousMIC

Anonymous

^ Have been told so. Not as good looking as my friend though.

well thats prob why u lost out to your friend then....most blokes are just shallow, its simple!

Reply 14

Anonymous #1

OP

Oh come on... do you expect attraction to work in a logical, easy to understand way?

No, but wouldn't you too feel rather passed by when guys always go for your friend?

most blokes are just shallow, its simple!

Argh crap. Thanks for the simple answer though :wink:

Would you prefer it if the guys who went for you didn't give a damn about the conversation ? You're not really at a loss the way I see it.

Could you explain what you mean a bit more please?

Reply 15

Psyk

16

Anonymous

My question is basically, why didn't he like me instead? I'm asking because this has happened to me several times now, once with a guy I really did like. Is it something about men, or is it something about me? (I'm pretty sure I never come across as desperate either, I'm just quite good at socialising and talking to people.)

You sound a bit big-headed. You want him to like you, even though you have no interest in him? Well maybe he's actually really smart and realises you just want him to be your play-thing and thats why he's not interested in you.

Reply 16

freshestkid

1

If you're happily in a relationship, why do you even care? Go hang out with the guy you ARE involved with

Reply 17

NotoriousMIC

i think you are seriously overestimating the complexity of the male mind... it usually is a simple reason..
i wouldnt get worried about it..i'm sure you a far better catch than your friend anyways.

Reply 18

username47781

20

attraction don't happen overnight, anyway if you already got a boyfriend why you trying to chat up this other guy.

Reply 19

Chumbaniya

17

Anonymous

No, but wouldn't you too feel rather passed by when guys always go for your friend?

Well if a guy went for my friend I wouldn't be too bothered, since I'd be after more feminine attention :p:

.

But anyway, I might feel annoyed but I'd accept it because that's the way it works. No matter how sensible it might seem to be attracted to people who are right for them, they'll still be attracted to people who are good looking. People are very good at fooling themselves into thinking their attraction is on a deeper level than it really is.

A Question for the Men-Folk

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