have feelings for a guy (im a guy too) confession? x_x

Been fancying him for almost a year...I don't wanna freak him out tho..he's shown signs that indicates he likes me but he's very shy and doesn't speak about his sexuality. L..how can I make him feel safe and tell him not to worry because I'm just as scared as him? And no one needs to know..I just want him to feel safe..how or what can I say when I confess? I like u and I wanna be with u/date u?

Thanks!

You really need to found out about his sexuality or any advances could end very embarrassingly for both of you.

He is gay..but he's very secretive about it

How do you know though?

I know people who know him from his hometown. And his ex gf btw..who hates him so much because of this.

What and they've all just randomly told you he's gay or did you ask them?

Most importantly though you haven't actually heard it from his own mouth. That makes me think it's probably best not to just dive in and say "well I know you're gay cos I can just tell and your friends from back home made it clear and so I really can't fight it anymore and have to tell you that I like you...do you like me I've been getting hints..."

This is not the way. You want to play it as cool as possible and as much as I know you probably just want to get everything out in the open you're going to have to be measured about it, as in take it slowly.

Firstly I suggest getting him to talk about sexuality. If you're close enough and you spend a lot of time together (which it kinda sounds like you do), then when you're alone together that's the kind of time you want to try to get to the bottom (no pun intended) of where he stands with his sexuality. At this stage unless he suddenly tells you he's gay and really likes you, which seems unlikely as you said he was shy then it's best you don't make any advance or tell him how you feel yourself. It's most likely going to be a gradual process but you yourself know the dynamic between you two and how you converse so you should be able to make a judgment as to how to go about it but I imagine the more casual and less interrogatory the better!

If you've managed to come to some kind of conclusion either through him saying something or through other things which mean it's pretty conclusive - he's gay/bi - WITHOUT having pounded it out of him (omg dodgy wording yet again) - then you can consider your feelings and whether to tell or whatever...

But again you'll have to make a judgment when/if it's the right time to do this and you obviously don't want to make it seedy but instead like you're caring, which you obviously are

Not sure what else to add any questions?

well i certainly wont dive in and say hey i know ur gay. heck ill pretend like i dont even know. I'll just be like lsn man ive been meaning to tell u something for some time now, but i dont want u to freak out. i kinda like u and stuff.

Aw okay well I hope it goes well and maybe let us know how you get on

thank you so so much!

Good luck and hope he likes you

Thank u...im confessing everything to him in 2 days..im so scared I feel like I'll make a fool out of myself and jumble up my words

Don't worry, it's cute if that happens

If you are going to do this then best of luck. Just make sure that if he doesn't want to talk about it then you need to respect that; and also remember that you could damage your friendship, even if he is gay. One of my best friends is closeted but if I told him I liked him our friendship would be really damaged, unless he fancied me too.

But im only telling him I like him not just cuz I do like him but because he has shown signs that he likes me...if he does like me, then chances are he won't say no or reject me even if he was scared? I can be like im just as scared and dont worry no one will ever know if you're not comfortable with it just yet

Thank u...im confessing everything to him in 2 days..im so scared I feel like I'll make a fool out of myself and jumble up my words

OP i think you could be gay

Obviously if he does like you and you declare your feelings for him, then something might happen, but I am saying that just because he is gay (which you don't know), that doesn't mean he does like you - especially since he doesn't know you are gay.

You are making the massive assumption that he likes you. Why do you think he does? What are the "signs"? You didn't mention them.