22 single female... what's wrong with me ?!?! :(

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Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 7 years ago
#1
Basically.. I'm not feeling sorry for myself(that much) but i need advice!!!

I have never been in a relationship, never slept with anyone and I feel like im at that age now that other people are shocked by this, and i'm really embarrassed by this
i've been hit on lots of times, and nearly had one night stands but i can't bring myself to do that...

it's just coming to that time, I need to hear from others if they're in the same situation and i would love some helpful advice on what I can do
i also come from a muslim family but not very strict so it makes it a bit harder to have a relationship:confused:
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Jack22031994
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I'm 20 and in the same position apart from the Muslim bit -




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jay2013
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Basically.. I'm not feeling sorry for myself(that much) but i need advice!!!

I have never been in a relationship, never slept with anyone and I feel like im at that age now that other people are shocked by this, and i'm really embarrassed by this
i've been hit on lots of times, and nearly had one night stands but i can't bring myself to do that...

it's just coming to that time, I need to hear from others if they're in the same situation and i would love some helpful advice on what I can do
i also come from a muslim family but not very strict so it makes it a bit harder to have a relationship:confused:
After being hit on, what do you do i.e. how do you respond to the guys?

What is it that you want exactly? Do you want a relationship or do you just want to lose your virginity? Or both?
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Miel Purple
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You're either a Muslim or you're not. If you're not, why are you bothering with relationships?
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awais-iq
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Basically.. I'm not feeling sorry for myself(that much) but i need advice!!!

I have never been in a relationship, never slept with anyone and I feel like im at that age now that other people are shocked by this, and i'm really embarrassed by this
i've been hit on lots of times, and nearly had one night stands but i can't bring myself to do that...

it's just coming to that time, I need to hear from others if they're in the same situation and i would love some helpful advice on what I can do
i also come from a muslim family but not very strict so it makes it a bit harder to have a relationship:confused:
just chill init
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Rosie786
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LOL I swear in islam you cannot have a relationship before marriage. Does not matter if your family is strict or not. It is just not allowed to sleep with someone before marriage?
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fluctuationsman
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post a pic of yourself, it's the only way to really tell...
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awais-iq
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(Original post by Rosie786)
LOL I swear in islam you cannot have a relationship before marriage. Does not matter if your family is strict or not. It is just not allowed to sleep with someone before marriage?
nah your not, but some people are too desperate i guess, desires over faith right here haha
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Rosie786
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(Original post by awais-iq)
nah your not, but some people are too desperate i guess, desires over faith right here haha
I can see that very clearly Lol.
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antipathy
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Firstly, try not to worry about sex. If you're wanting a relationship, focus on this, and then the sex will come naturally as a part of that, and it'll be a lot less pressured and more intimate than any one night stand.

As for relationships, now that you're presumably out of education, what do you do with your spare time? After people start work, in can get really hard to meet new people of similar age/interests, and I definitely empathise. Your chances of meeting a nice guy and 'clicking' are directly proportional to the number of guys you meet in a casual social setting.

If you're not meeting many eligible guys at work or through friends and activities, then perhaps focus on addressing this. Try and be more of a social creature and you're more likely to bump into someone you like.

Religion will be a barrier for some people, but its good that your parents seem open minded. If you do find someone you like, it would probably be worth reassuring them early on that they're not going to be under too much scrutiny by your family. It may be a worry otherwise for some people, especially if they're not a Muslim themselves.
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Jebedee
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Stop rejecting advances or stop complaining.

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suedonim
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non-Muslim people are unlikely to be shocked because they won't think about it much. Your family may be different but be grateful they aren't trying to arrange a marriage for you.

Do things where you will meet new people, sign up to internet dating if you want or ask your family to arrange a marriage if it really bothers you.
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Jaegon Targaryen
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Why are you suprised your q virgin when you turn down proposals ? Sorry but beggars can't be choosers
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Anonymous #2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Basically.. I'm not feeling sorry for myself(that much) but i need advice!!!

I have never been in a relationship, never slept with anyone and I feel like im at that age now that other people are shocked by this, and i'm really embarrassed by this
i've been hit on lots of times, and nearly had one night stands but i can't bring myself to do that...

it's just coming to that time, I need to hear from others if they're in the same situation and i would love some helpful advice on what I can do
i also come from a muslim family but not very strict so it makes it a bit harder to have a relationship:confused:

no matter what age you are or religion , you shouldn't worry about not being in a relationship as they say its easy to find relationships but hard to maintain them. you should not be embarrassed as there are many people single mainly because of their religion,Maybeyour destined to get married and have that relationship as in islam it isforbidden to have a pre-marriage relationship
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kharah
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go with the flow
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kharah
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Im in the same position but I don't really care as I know that there is someone in the world made for me, so go with the flow .EASY!
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Miel Purple)
You're either a Muslim or you're not. If you're not, why are you bothering with relationships?
I haven't really made this about religion, i just mentioned it because it pulls me back from getting into a relationship sometimes
BUT my parents are open minded, and like i said are not strict (in comparison to some of the muslim families i have seen). Also there are thousands of muslims in relationships, what world are you living in?! If in secret or in the open, it's happening.. In today's society, there are muslim dating sites etc.. and hardly anyone i know waits for marriage these days, it's personal opinion and it's just life in this century

(Original post by awais-iq)
nah your not, but some people are too desperate i guess, desires over faith right here haha
Also.. it's not desperation, but really every human being whatever faith desires for a relationship/sex in some form and at some point in their life. I have never met a young Muslim that is living in the UK that hasn't agreed with me on this..

(Original post by Rosie786)
LOL I swear in islam you cannot have a relationship before marriage. Does not matter if your family is strict or not. It is just not allowed to sleep with someone before marriage?
yep... but in a modern day situation and with parents/family that does not enforce Islam onto you and let you choose for yourself then there are exceptions. There are lots of religions that don't allow certain things, but many individuals don't abide to these rules ... i don't drink/smoke or harm anyone so i didn't really ask of you to judge me..


But thanks to some of you for some good advice xoxo
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Rosie786
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(Original post by Anonymous)
I haven't really made this about religion, i just mentioned it because it pulls me back from getting into a relationship sometimes
BUT my parents are open minded, and like i said are not strict (in comparison to some of the muslim families i have seen). Also there are thousands of muslims in relationships, what world are you living in?! If in secret or in the open, it's happening.. In today's society, there are muslim dating sites etc.. and hardly anyone i know waits for marriage these days, it's personal opinion and it's just life in this century



Also.. it's not desperation, but really every human being whatever faith desires for a relationship/sex in some form and at some point in their life. I have never met a young Muslim that is living in the UK that hasn't agreed with me on this..



yep... but in a modern day situation and with parents/family that does not enforce Islam onto you and let you choose for yourself then there are exceptions. There are lots of religions that don't allow certain things, but many individuals don't abide to these rules ... i don't drink/smoke or harm anyone so i didn't really ask of you to judge me..


But thanks to some of you for some good advice xoxo
I didn't judge you. Just because you mentioned muslim so i said its not allowed in Islam regardless of people abiding by it or not
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Guy Secretan
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Allah is really dissapointed in you
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ForgetMe
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You are not alone :hugs: I see friends around me getting married or even starting to have children, and when I see myself, I'm at 0 :mmm: But at least I do know that one day will be my day :gah: I might be stupid but I'd rather wait for one rather than make 10 stupid mistakes
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