Bf/GF going to same university

Just wondered if anyone has had the experience of going to the same university with their boyfriend. me and my boyfriend are and we love each other to bits at the moment ut do you think this will change when we get to uni, things like separate courses, separate residences, do you think it wil be able to last or will we eventually drift apart as many other people say on TSR.
I would appreciate your replies.I'm posting anon becase bf also uses this forum.
Thanks

Reply 1

username47781

20

Not saying it will happen to you but i've heard horror stories of boyfriends and girlfriends staying in the same house and alot of them never stay together.

Reply 2

Jack0

Don't do it, I speak from experience.

Reply 3

Cookie87

my friends go to the same uni. they have their own lives but they are still tgetha and really happy. dont listen to the stories..you've just gotta give it a try, if you dont you will always wonder "what if"....if it doesn't work you'll b at uni with loads of new frends to keep u busy

Reply 4

Luize

13

I am about to move in with my boyfriend at uni (along with two other mutual friends). Although we did meet there we do still have seperate friends and do our own thing while also having time together.

I wouldn't let where your boy or girlfriend are going influence where you decided to go. You never really know what could happen between now and leaving.

Reply 5

Talya

16

I'm going to uni with my bf.. I hope it works out! We're not like most people though (ie: we won't be going out clubbing etc) cause we're geeks, so I think we'll be OK!

Reply 6

so_this_is_sam

3

I hope you didnt let your partner influence which uni went to. My friends done that and i feel desperately sorry for her and just hope that she is able to have her own life without him getting angry at her etc. But if you are in as much love as you seem to think, and you both chose the uni sensibly and not cos the other is going there, then you have a chance. Think it'll be hard though

Reply 7

marcusfox

16

I met my then girlfriend in my second year at uni, which was her first year, and we stayed together throughout my finishing and through her masters. But we sadly broke up during her PhD as she commuted to uni from her home in Sussex whilst I live in Nottingham.

Marcus

Reply 8

Talya

16

so_this_is_sam

I hope you didnt let your partner influence which uni went to. My friends done that and i feel desperately sorry for her and just hope that she is able to have her own life without him getting angry at her etc. But if you are in as much love as you seem to think, and you both chose the uni sensibly and not cos the other is going there, then you have a chance. Think it'll be hard though

Why hard?

Durham is both our favourite place after Oxbridge... so we won't feel trapped by the other person's decision.

Reply 9

Jet

4

Id rather be going to the same university as my boyfriend than keep a long distance relationship going, count yourself lucky, you will each have your own space and interests but can see each other whenever you want, what could be better?!

Reply 10

so_this_is_sam

3

Talya

Why hard?

Durham is both our favourite place after Oxbridge... so we won't feel trapped by the other person's decision.

that's all good then...its only cos i know a few ppl who seem a bit blind in love and didnt really look at uni's, just applied to the one their bf is going to...but that's her own story and i wish her luck. Im sure it's different for you :smile:

Reply 11

bobbob

11

One of my friends decided he wanted to go to the same Uni as his GF. Now they've split up, he can't stand her and he's forced to go to a Uni he doesn't want to.

Reply 12

kizer

15

For people like me who are going to have to have a LDR at uni, this seems a bit ridiculous. You will be going to uni together, which means your relationship has every chance of surviving. If it doesn't, it wouldn't have anyway.

Reply 13

Laika

1

I did it and would advise against it.

It could definitely be worked through but I think it is overall healthier for a couple of this age to live seperately. Then again as long as you don't actually live in the same house and make an effort to go out and form seperate social spheres then it wouldn't be that big a deal.

Reply 14

SugarExplosion

I'm going to the same uni as my bf in September, but we met after we'd both done our uni stuff...was just a happy coincidance. We've both talked about it and kind of prepared ourselves for arguments in the first month or so until we get our boundaries set, but we've agreed that we need to make our own set of friends but still spend time together. All we can do is see how it goes. I'd definitely say give it a shot :smile:

Reply 15

*Claire*

1

Don't pick your uni cos of your partner. A lot of relationships will not last throughout uni simply cos people grow and change. If you have picked your uni based on someone else then split up you will be bitter about it. Even if you don't split up, you may still resent them.

However if you have both chosen the same uni then that is different. I'd say its usually best not to live in the same halls & make your own friends. At the beginning you should resist the temptation to see each other too much or you won't make as many friends cos people will give up inviting you out. This might cause arguments but its probably best if you agree not to see each other too much initially, even if you are feeling lonely. After a few weeks when you have settled in, your relationship will be like those people that get together at uni. If anything does go wrong you have your own friends & your own space.

A girl I knew got together with a guy on the 1st night of uni. (She had known him before uni). He lived about 10mins away by bus, altho at a different uni, & spent all her time going to his. Because of that we never got to know her so well. I thought she missed out a bit by not making more effort at the beginning with people in her halls.

Reply 16

Anonymous #2

If you try and get a house with other ppl who are mates be prepared for them to not like it. I would definately never live with a boyfriend/girlfriend combo ... because if they broke up it would be an absolute disaster for the house.

Reply 17

Alasdair

14

Anonymous

Just wondered if anyone has had the experience of going to the same university with their boyfriend. me and my boyfriend are and we love each other to bits at the moment ut do you think this will change when we get to uni, things like separate courses, separate residences, do you think it wil be able to last or will we eventually drift apart as many other people say on TSR.
I would appreciate your replies.I'm posting anon becase bf also uses this forum.
Thanks

I don't agree with going to Uni with a boyfriend or girlfriend (you change so much even in the first couple of months).
HOWEVER, if you are going to be attached when you start Uni I guess it's better to be attached to somebody at the same Uni, then you can share the experience.

But for god's sake don't live with him. That's just utterly the worst idea ever.

Reply 18

devilgirl999

1

right i think living with him is a very bad idea. my brother and his girlfriend go to similar unis in the same city, whilst its different from being the same uni, the nights out, campus's, and halls are all joined up. im talking about liverpool uni and liverpool john moore. they live in separate houses but regularly meet up for dinner at one of the houses, which is a better idea than moving in.

however: if you end up breaking up with the boyfriend think how you are going to feel if you broke up and they are parading their new girlfriend round uni! you'll feel like s*** right? so id only go to the same uni if youve been together for more than a year. (my brother and his girlfriend had been together for a year and a half b4 they went to uni)

Reply 19

foxiroxi

10

If it's ment to be you will stay together if not you won't. That will depend if you went to the same uni or different uni's :smile:

Bf/GF going to same university

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