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Feminists, do you agree with chivalry?

Well I basically don't see how those two words mix but I'm interested to see what everyone thinks. Non feminists welcome to share too
You should define what you think constitutes chivalry.
Reply 2
Avatar for Madisonrose
Madisonrose
OP
2
As in paying every bill, being expected to open doors, generally men going out of their way to do things to help women.
I don't think anyone can honestly claim to be a feminist and expect the man to pay the bill every time.
Reply 4
Avatar for Madisonrose
Madisonrose
OP
2
Chivalry is basically an idea of the big strong man having to protect the weak, helpless woman, and then probably expecting sex at the end of it. Yes chivalry has it's benefits for women, but if you're a true feminist, you have to sacrifice that or it would just simply contradict equality for both genders


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I agree with politeness no matter what gender. Sure, hold a door open for a woman. But equally, hold it for a guy coming in behind you too- no need to slam it in his face just because he's male :confused: And I would never allow my boyfriend to always pay for me- I feel terrible when he tries to! He earns twice as much as I do at the moment, so he tends to pay for more, but I pay for a fair number of cinema visits and meals out too. How anyone can expect somebody to pay for everything and still feel good about themself and the situation is completely beyond me :p:
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by Jelephant
I agree with politeness no matter what gender. Sure, hold a door open for a woman. But equally, hold it for a guy coming in behind you too- no need to slam it in his face just because he's male :confused: And I would never allow my boyfriend to always pay for me- I feel terrible when he tries to! He earns twice as much as I do at the moment, so he tends to pay for more, but I pay for a fair number of cinema visits and meals out too. How anyone can expect somebody to pay for everything and still feel good about themself and the situation is completely beyond me :p:

pretty much this tbh.
Original post by Jelephant
I agree with politeness no matter what gender. Sure, hold a door open for a woman. But equally, hold it for a guy coming in behind you too- no need to slam it in his face just because he's male :confused: And I would never allow my boyfriend to always pay for me- I feel terrible when he tries to! He earns twice as much as I do at the moment, so he tends to pay for more, but I pay for a fair number of cinema visits and meals out too. How anyone can expect somebody to pay for everything and still feel good about themself and the situation is completely beyond me :p:


rep rep rep
Reply 8
Avatar for The_Duck
The_Duck
7
Politeness is one thing, and chivalry another.
I'll happily hold a door open for someone, and occasionally get the bill for something if I feel like it's my treat or you don't have money, but I'll be damned if I pay for everything just cause I have a dick.
Original post by Madisonrose
Chivalry is basically an idea of the big strong man having to protect the weak, helpless woman, and then probably expecting sex at the end of it. Yes chivalry has it's benefits for women, but if you're a true feminist, you have to sacrifice that or it would just simply contradict equality for both genders


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No; it's about knowing that women can take care of themselves but still taking care of them anyway. It's simply good etiquette and isn't (always) about sex. Ideally, protocol extends to all women regardless of their physical attractiveness.

I do agree though that if feminists want equal treatment they certainly shouldn't still expect men to pay for their food or open car doors for them.
Original post by Madisonrose
As in paying every bill, being expected to open doors, generally men going out of their way to do things to help women.



Doesn't mention anything about women here:


Chivalry, or the chivalric code, is a code of conduct associated with the medieval institution of knighthood. Chivalry arose from an idealized German custom.[1] It developed first in the north of France among horse soldiers who served in Charlemagne′s heavy cavalry.[2] It was originally conceived of as an aristocratic warrior code — the term derives from the French term chevalerie, meaning horse soldiery[3] — involving gallantry, individual training, and service to others. Over time its meaning has been refined to emphasise more ideals such as the knightly virtues of honour, courtly love, courtesy, and less martial aspects of the tradition.
Original post by Madisonrose
Well I basically don't see how those two words mix but I'm interested to see what everyone thinks. Non feminists welcome to share too


No. It's stupid. Like really really stupid. why not just be nice to everyone rather than just women.
Original post by Dandaman1
No; it's about knowing that women can take care of themselves but still taking care of them anyway. It's simply good etiquette and isn't (always) about sex. Ideally, protocol extends to all women regardless of their physical attractiveness.

I do agree though that if feminists want equal treatment they certainly shouldn't still expect men to pay for their food or open car doors for them.


I all honesty anyone in short skirts and large heels could do with having the door opened for them. It's more about practicality than anything else. Just as you would an old person, it's about reduced mobility.
Most feminists are opposed to "chivalry" which is why I find this "Chivalry when they want it, sexism when they don't" shtick to be a pretty poor strawman by bitter young men

To be a completely honest, women want a man who is important and has a lot of status and unless you actually are those things, chivalry just comes across as trying to emulate how you think people higher than you, act. Which is the actual reason women hate it.

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