Please help I feel like life is all about calories and weight Watch

hermitthefrog
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I've always been obsessed with weight. I remember I first got called fat when I was 9 years old and I can honestly say I don't think a day has gone by where I haven't thought of weight or body image since then. I asked for a trampoline that Christmas purely because I thought it was going to help me become slim. Despite this I have never been underweight. I am 5ft 6 and at my highest weight, at Christmas 2011 I weighed 10st 12, making me dangerously close to overweight. Since then I've gone through spells of losing and gaining weight and today I stand at 9st 2 give or take the odd pound. I know this is a perfectly healthy weight for my height but I'm just unhappy. I feel worthless and feel like the only way to be happy is to get into the 8 stone group. The thing is I'm making myself so unhappy trying to get there, living off 1200 calories one day, then eating everything in sight and feeling incredibly guilty the next. It's a constant cycle.

The thing is, I know deep down I would stop having so many of these "binge" episodes if I could be less concerned about the calories and just eat well every day. But I can't. I am completely and utterly obsessed with calories and track of my calories eaten with total precision, down to weighing all my food.

Not only am I obsessed with my own eating habits, I spend ridiculous amounts of time on twitter and Instagram looking at girls I barely know, wishing I could be as skinny as them, and reading their tweets scanning for mentions of their eating habits. I feel comforted by seeing that other people eat junk food too. Anyone I ever see in the street, in pictures etc. my first thought is always without fail 'is she bigger or skinnier than me?'.

I don't know what to do. All I know is my obsession with calories and weight is making me miserable. I'm so unhappy and feel so inadequate. I am supposed to be studying for my uni exams and instead my thoughts are so consumed with food. Is this normal? Is this just how all young females feel?

Just as an aside, I exercise too and love it. I go to the gym around 5 times a week and do a mixture of cardio and strength, so don't suggest worrying less about what I eat and exercising more.

I don't know what I was hoping to achieve from this, I just needed to get it all off my chest and don't feel I can talk to anyone as my friends would just compete to have bigger problems which they probably do, but still, and I couldn't bare the thought of my mum knowing all this was going on inside my head, as she already worries enough from the little snippets I do tell her.




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jay2013
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(Original post by hermitthefrog)
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What is a calorie?
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hermitthefrog
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I don't know why I even bothered


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TurboCretin
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(Original post by hermitthefrog)
I've always been obsessed with weight. I remember I first got called fat when I was 9 years old and I can honestly say I don't think a day has gone by where I haven't thought of weight or body image since then. I asked for a trampoline that Christmas purely because I thought it was going to help me become slim. Despite this I have never been underweight. I am 5ft 6 and at my highest weight, at Christmas 2011 I weighed 10st 12, making me dangerously close to overweight. Since then I've gone through spells of losing and gaining weight and today I stand at 9st 2 give or take the odd pound. I know this is a perfectly healthy weight for my height but I'm just unhappy. I feel worthless and feel like the only way to be happy is to get into the 8 stone group. The thing is I'm making myself so unhappy trying to get there, living off 1200 calories one day, then eating everything in sight and feeling incredibly guilty the next. It's a constant cycle.

The thing is, I know deep down I would stop having so many of these "binge" episodes if I could be less concerned about the calories and just eat well every day. But I can't. I am completely and utterly obsessed with calories and track of my calories eaten with total precision, down to weighing all my food.

Not only am I obsessed with my own eating habits, I spend ridiculous amounts of time on twitter and Instagram looking at girls I barely know, wishing I could be as skinny as them, and reading their tweets scanning for mentions of their eating habits. I feel comforted by seeing that other people eat junk food too. Anyone I ever see in the street, in pictures etc. my first thought is always without fail 'is she bigger or skinnier than me?'.

I don't know what to do. All I know is my obsession with calories and weight is making me miserable. I'm so unhappy and feel so inadequate. I am supposed to be studying for my uni exams and instead my thoughts are so consumed with food. Is this normal? Is this just how all young females feel?

Just as an aside, I exercise too and love it. I go to the gym around 5 times a week and do a mixture of cardio and strength, so don't suggest worrying less about what I eat and exercising more.

I don't know what I was hoping to achieve from this, I just needed to get it all off my chest and don't feel I can talk to anyone as my friends would just compete to have bigger problems which they probably do, but still, and I couldn't bare the thought of my mum knowing all this was going on inside my head, as she already worries enough from the little snippets I do tell her.




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This isn't really enough info to offer any suggestions, if that's what you were going for. Maybe talk to someone you trust about what you can do to get more in line with your body image (PE teacher, for example), or if you think your body image itself is a problem then perhaps speak to your doctor.
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hermitthefrog
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(Original post by TurboCretin)
This isn't really enough info to offer any suggestions, if that's what you were going for. Maybe talk to someone you trust about what you can do to get more in line with your body image (PE teacher, for example), or if you think your body image itself is a problem then perhaps speak to your doctor.
I still want to lose weight and be healthy I just want to do it in a healthier way and not lose my mind over it and have it consuming my every waking thought.


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TurboCretin
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(Original post by hermitthefrog)
I still want to lose weight and be healthy I just want to do it in a healthier way and not lose my mind over it and have it consuming my every waking thought.


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As I say, I'm not going off much info here. A few suggestions: eat lots of small meals, rather than three substantial ones; eat properly in order to stop yourself bingeing - 1200 calories a day is too low to be sustainable; sleep well; always have a glass/bottle of water around to encourage you to drink regularly and reduce your fluid retention; don't confine your workout to the gym - walk as much as possible and make activity part of your lifestyle.
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guppygould
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A few points:

1. A calorie is simply a measure of energy, where it comes from matters too (I'm talking macros.) 1200 is outrageously low though.
2. Weight is only relative. A more telling stat would be body fat %

Regardless of this I would eat what you feel like (as long as it includes protein,) go to the gym and lift heavy stuff. This will not only increase your base metabolic rate (so you need more calories while you're doing nothing,) but is also good fun. Don't do what a load of girls do where they just eat veg and do just cardio!

-Leo
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CarpDiem
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Pm'ed you
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Bagel93
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I can't really offer any proper help as I've not experienced it. However it sounds like you might suffer from an ED and should look into getting some help. As anyone can get one, you don't have to be underweight to suffer.

*hugs* I hope one day your weight and calories won't weigh you down so much!
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Clone93
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(Original post by hermitthefrog)
I've always been obsessed with weight. I remember I first got called fat when I was 9 years old and I can honestly say I don't think a day has gone by where I haven't thought of weight or body image since then. I asked for a trampoline that Christmas purely because I thought it was going to help me become slim. Despite this I have never been underweight. I am 5ft 6 and at my highest weight, at Christmas 2011 I weighed 10st 12, making me dangerously close to overweight. Since then I've gone through spells of losing and gaining weight and today I stand at 9st 2 give or take the odd pound. I know this is a perfectly healthy weight for my height but I'm just unhappy. I feel worthless and feel like the only way to be happy is to get into the 8 stone group. The thing is I'm making myself so unhappy trying to get there, living off 1200 calories one day, then eating everything in sight and feeling incredibly guilty the next. It's a constant cycle.

The thing is, I know deep down I would stop having so many of these "binge" episodes if I could be less concerned about the calories and just eat well every day. But I can't. I am completely and utterly obsessed with calories and track of my calories eaten with total precision, down to weighing all my food.

Not only am I obsessed with my own eating habits, I spend ridiculous amounts of time on twitter and Instagram looking at girls I barely know, wishing I could be as skinny as them, and reading their tweets scanning for mentions of their eating habits. I feel comforted by seeing that other people eat junk food too. Anyone I ever see in the street, in pictures etc. my first thought is always without fail 'is she bigger or skinnier than me?'.

I don't know what to do. All I know is my obsession with calories and weight is making me miserable. I'm so unhappy and feel so inadequate. I am supposed to be studying for my uni exams and instead my thoughts are so consumed with food. Is this normal? Is this just how all young females feel?

Just as an aside, I exercise too and love it. I go to the gym around 5 times a week and do a mixture of cardio and strength, so don't suggest worrying less about what I eat and exercising more.

I don't know what I was hoping to achieve from this, I just needed to get it all off my chest and don't feel I can talk to anyone as my friends would just compete to have bigger problems which they probably do, but still, and I couldn't bare the thought of my mum knowing all this was going on inside my head, as she already worries enough from the little snippets I do tell her.




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This is going to sound bleak but it should help you out, it did me when i was bogged down with life issues and ****.

You are going to die one day and one day soon, before you even know it your youth will be spent and you'll be knocking on death's door. In the blink of an eye you are going to disappear from this universe never to be seen again. Everything that matters to you, everyone who matters to you they won't matter. It's not sleep, unconsciousness or transport to a different plane of existence, it's not even the end, it will be like you were never born. Shortly after that your children will die (should you choose to have any) And their children and so forth until all that's left of you in the universe (your memory) is forgotten in time. Nothing you choose to do with your life means anything if you save lives, so what, they'll die eventually and it wouldn't have mattered, the human race will go extinct whether it's in 50 years or 50000000 years, it's going to happen. You don't matter, nothing you do matters and nothing will last. There is no point in life, yours, mine, a doctors, the pope, no one matters. With this all in mind, why should you worry about how other people think about you? Why should you even worry about how you how you view yourself? Just live your life for as long as you can live it because it will end and you don't want to be on your death bed thinking "If only I had been more out going" or **** like that...or maybe you do....

What i'm trying to say is just be happy, because at the end of the day that's the only way to live a good life.
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jay2013
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(Original post by hermitthefrog)
I don't know why I even bothered

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There is no need to obsess over calories. In fact the obsession over calories is silly for the reasons I explain below.

A calorie is the amount of energy required to raise one gram of water by one degree Celsius. However it is also applied to marconutrients - protein (4 calories per gram), carbohydrate (4 calories per gram) and fat (9 calories per gram).

Therefore eating 1200 calories a day doesn't mean anything if it's not the right balance e.g. you could be eating 1200 calories but this could be all fat (133 grams). Therefore obsessing over "calories" is not necessary. What is better is breaking down your food intake into percentages for each marconutrient e.g. 20% of the food you eat will be fat, 20% will be protein and 60% will be carbohydrates. This way you only need to look at the grams for each in food and not worry about calories.

We all have to die one day, death is inevitable. It's going to happen either tomorrow or in 60 years from now. So stop worrying about your weight and body image. Live your life, go out, have some fun, focus on your uni exams, be happy
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hermitthefrog
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Rakas21
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OP. Eat healthier food and increase your consumption to 1500-1800. Don't fall into the trap of just doing cardio, you should start doing compound exercises.

(Original post by G8D)
I thought this was going to be a Riku thread.
While one can imagine a thread on the topic this title is feminine while Riku's have an air of paranoia.
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doodle_333
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(Original post by hermitthefrog)
I still want to lose weight and be healthy I just want to do it in a healthier way and not lose my mind over it and have it consuming my every waking thought.


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forcing your body to maintain a weight below where you naturally sit isn't healthy even if you do it through 'healthy' means...

when you starve yourself of nutrients (which I imagine you are doing as when people binge it isn't usually on nutritious food) your body functioning changes, you become anxious, depressed and obsessive about food/weight, and you also become prone to binging - the first step to being happier is to stop counting calories, stop compensating for binges, just eat healthy foods, in amounts that stop you being hungry, and have the odd treat (if this is impossible start with a meal plan of 2000-2500cals maybe?) you may gain some weight initially but once your body is healthy you probably wont feel so bad about being over 9st anyway

if you continue to struggle it might be worth trying to access a counsellor
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ItsJustMe17
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Hey Google young n healthy and download the pdf . Gives you an outline of what you should eat and the sort of exercises you should.do to lose weight healthy I used it and its great! Although ive always been slim , it has helped me tone up, etc. Hope this helps

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