A male in London can't date decently on income of less than 40k p.a

I pray to god that I'm wrong on this but currently this is my standing assumption:

A male in London can't have a decent dating life on income of less than 40K p.a (my ballpark figure, yours may vary).

My thoughts are that if you're a guy in London, working as a professional (wearing a suit and tie on your dating profile pic is sufficient to leave that impression with the ladies) then you're expected to pick up the tab on dates. This of course is true anywhere, but as a London professional, you're expected to take a girl to at least a half decent place, plus some more special places (a show/musical or concert, restaurant) every now and then.

For someone who wants to live in a half decent place, eat normally and has student loans to pay back, I don't see this level of dating being reached before you're earning at least in the 40K region.

I tried it on a lower salary and just ended up with continuous negative bank balances (well not overdraft, just that the ending balance was always lower than the starting balance).

Obviously if a girl can choose between two guys of equivalent qualities but one can take her to nicer places, then its a no brainer she'll go for the latter.

As such I see little point in spending my hard earned cash on girls at my current economic status as I will only be able to keep up decent dating for a short while before my bank account balance catches up with me and stops the entire thing.

Now I hope, I really really hope, that I am wrong, but currently I don't see it that way. Dating in London is the privilege of higher rate tax payers. I will join their ranks soon but for now I must remain in my solitude.

Agree, disagree?

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Reply 1

Bambabam

Hi I currently have an income of ten pounds of pocket money a week, I live in London and me and my girlfriend have been going out for two weeks. So I don't agree with you, sorry. Maybe getting some girlfsblackberry pins and sending them funny things and jokes?

Reply 2

antipathy

I think you're falling into the trap of talking about 'women' as one identical group.

If anything, if you're dating 'young professional women' in London, then I would expect them to be both of higher than average education and earnings - both of which suggest that they would be more likely to have liberal attitudes when it comes to traditional gender roles and expectations in terms of dates.

Some women may expect to be wined and dined at your expense, many (I would suggest most), will be happy with going dutch.

tl;dr - Women are different, date ones that aren't wanting to be financially dependent on you.

Reply 3

MichelBraga

I'm still absorving this. Give me some time.

Reply 4

Bambabam

Original post by MichelBraga

I'm still absorving this. Give me some time.

what do you mean?

Reply 5

Ggmu!

I'd be disappointed if 40k was my end-salary.

Reply 6

Crazy92

I have dated on 16k pa in London and on 45+k pa in London.

There wasn't a significant difference, in fact, dating on 16k meant that I had to be a bit more creative and romantic with date ideas and I think both of us had a better time!

Reply 7

russellsteapot

Or you could just not pay for everything.

I don't imagine women in London are any different to those anywhere else in the country. You'll find plenty who don't need to roll around uselessly while the man pays for everything.

I think many people fall into the trap of materialist dating, trying to live up to some out-of-reach ideal. You can't live the life of someone who earns £100k when you earn £20k, yet far too many people try to do it. The worst part of this is that it attracts men/women who think it's normal, so you have more pressure to live up to it.

Get a realistic girlfriend, stop being so insecure and stop trying to define yourself by paying for expensive things, you'll be fine.

(edited 9 years ago)

Reply 8

BlackLipBastard

Original post by Ggmu!

I'd be disappointed if 40k was my end-salary.

Who wouldn't

Reply 9

MichelBraga

Original post by Bambabam

what do you mean?

Your presumption that girls prefer more wealthy guys is absurd. And dating someone doesn't necessary require expensive treats. Maybe pop concerts or fashion venues are expensive, but depending on your taste, it is quite possible to have a fulfilling social life with an average salary.

Reply 10

Bambabam

Original post by MichelBraga

I'm not going to even pretend like i understand half those words..

Reply 11

Ggmu!

Original post by BlackLipBastard

Who wouldn't

A lot of people tbh, 40k is quite a big salary. But i'm spoiled and 40k wouldn't cover what I'm used to lol.

Reply 12

MichelBraga

Original post by Bambabam

I'm not going to even pretend like i understand half those words..

I'm a foreign with a foreign autocorrect. Sorry. :s-smilie:

Reply 13

Bambabam

Original post by MichelBraga

I'm a foreign with a foreign autocorrect. Sorry. :s-smilie:

You're just like a dream :smile:

Reply 14

MichelBraga

Original post by Bambabam

You're just like a dream :smile:

Ok, I'll take that as a compliment :wink:

Reply 15

Bambabam

Original post by MichelBraga

Ok, I'll take that as a compliment :wink:

I'm having you for dinner tonight

Reply 16

MichelBraga

Original post by Bambabam

I'm having you for dinner tonight

I just realised that I've made a small mistake and referred my initial point to you instead of the creator of the thread.

Still, no regrets, I'm deeply enjoying this. :smile:

Reply 17

ilem

Or you can just not pay for everything and rightfully expect her to pay for her share.

Reply 18

e aí rapaz

OP you are completely correct. This is why all of the hundreds of thousands of people who live in London and earn less than 40k are single. It's a real problem.

Reply 19

Rebel_Chick

I...I don't understand. Simplify this, please. Or, talk about something else. I'm getting the impression the OP thinks men who don't make a certain amount of money are unappealing to women. Is that it, serg? I disagree. Unless you're with some bore who wants to be wined and dined exclusively. I mean yes it's ideal and romantic but it's not everything. Men who are on the dole date all the time; why do you think single parenthood is so common lol