Should I tell my friends? Advice needed (kinda urgently) Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 5 years ago
#1
I'm not quite sure where to post this, but I think here should do.

I could go on forever about this, but I'm going to get straight to the point. One of my family members is appearing in court soon, and is extremely like to be given a custodial sentence. This is emotionally affecting me quite deeply, but my friends are mostly oblivious to it. The thing is, due to the seriousness of it all, there's a strong chance it will be in the local newspaper meaning that my friends will read about it and they will definitely know that it's about my family member, which I think will create a very awkward situation with regards to talking to me or asking me about it etc. So, should I tell them a little while before the court hearing so that when(/if) they see it in the media it won't cause them confusion or potential upset?

If I told them, should i do it in person or over a group chat? The issue with telling them is that I'd just feel like I'm attention-seeking. And they probably wouldn't know how to respond (due to the nature of what has happened), and how would we return back to normal conservation after telling them? My family problems obviously aren't to do with my friends, so i don't want to seem irrelevant or inappropriate by sharing this, but at the same time i don't want them to find out for the first time in the paper one evening and then it be awkward the next day. Urgh i don't know.

Any comments are appreciated, thanks in advance.
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RHyoudon'kno
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Tell them, then say 'just to let you know'.
Straight after that you say 'I don't want to talk about it, so let's change the subject.' You HAVE to say this cheerfully, otherwise it would end up so wrong.
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i'mlaura
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This sounds like a difficult situation and most people cannot relate to having a family member in court or even in a local newspaper, so they're properly going to gossip and talk about it behind your back afterwards. It's not what you want to hear but these things happen.

If I were you I'd be completely cool about it if you don't want to make a massive deal about it, either big it up and give them something to talk about (as they will anyway) or say that you don't want people to talk about it (and that will get passed around as well).

You aren't attention seeking at all, that's when you make a big deal out of something that isn't a deal at all, but this is. As long as it doesn't change the person you are then it shouldn't matter, afterall you haven't done anything wrong and you need to remember that.
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bakergirl
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Tell then in person that way there can be no confusion. But just let them know that you don't want it to be a big deal you just wanted to let them know so that they wouldn't feel awkward. They'll be fine with it, after all you haven't committed the crime, they could offer you some support as well as you go through the court case.
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