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Getting to that date (online dating query) Watch

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    Looking for some advice.

    I have been speaking to a girl online for about 5 days now back and forth on a dating site. Usually it doesn't get very far but this girl seems different - we seem to have a lot to say to each other and I think she might be quite keen, I know I certainly am. So yesterday I worked up the courage to make the move and ask her on a date. The problem is she's really busy with work and she has to travel to and from work quite some distance. I said I know she is really busy with work but would she fancy a drink sometime. She replied that would be nice but she said because of work she doesn't know when she will be free and will let me know. So I said that's cool and we've continued speaking since.

    I'm just wondering how long I should wait now - I don't want to come across desperate and mention it again too soon but I also don't want to be waiting weeks for her to confirm a possible day.

    Advice please!
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    Ask her to tell you when the time comes that she has a free day that she could meet you for the date. The ball is then in her court and you shouldn't have to worry about it anymore .
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    be VERY VERY VERY cautious because she might not even exist irl

    here's some ideas, if she has a profile pic google it. if there is a "best guess for this picture" then she's fake. Don't ever get catfished.
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    I don't accept "I'll let you know". I'm the one that let's people know not the other way around so I'd just say "so it'll have to be on your day off then right?". If she doesn't say yes just stop wasting time and move on TBH.

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    It was a month before I was able to meet up, but in the meantime we wrote daily and really enjoyed our correspondence. I looked forward to coming home and seeing what he'd written. Had a couple of phone calls, then we met at the zoo when we finally had a day free.

    I married him nearly 10 years ago.
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    (Original post by Crumpet1)
    It was a month before I was able to meet up, but in the meantime we wrote daily and really enjoyed our correspondence. I looked forward to coming home and seeing what he'd written. Had a couple of phone calls, then we met at the zoo when we finally had a day free.

    I married him nearly 10 years ago.
    That's so lovely. :daydreaming:

    Similarly, it was a month before I was able to meet with my boyfriend, due to work / study commitments and wanting to get to know him a little better before taking the plunge (we spoke on Skype, with webcams, messaged daily etc., etc. in the meantime).

    OP, I'd just ask her to let you know when she has a free day coming up so you do not have to worry about 'putting pressure on' or constantly chasing after her to meet up. Just keep a reasonable time frame in mind after which you'd not be so interested, to save yourself hanging on unnecessarily.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    I have said to her to let me know and she said she will so there's not really much else I can do other than to say would a specific day be ok (like a weekend) but then I run the risk of that being no good or her being put off.

    I do have to say I'm enjoying the correspondence too - obviously I'd like it to progress so that we exchange numbers but I would usually do that once a date has been agreed on so we can arrange the specifics.

    I know when someone is playing a game or isn't interested but this isn't the case - she does respond frequently and we have lengthy conversations. I am conscious of the fact she is really busy though so I'm just unsure how to play it. I'm thinking of waiting a few more days to see if she mentions a day to meet up and if she doesn't I'm going to suggest an actual day. If she says she can't do it I would still keep talking to her because as some of you have said it took you a month to meet up and we've only been speaking just under a week now. It's not ideal for me but in all honestly I haven't got anything else in the pipeline.
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    It's a different way of getting to know someone, but that doesn't make it wrong. For us, it meant that we really wanted to like each other when we first met, because we already liked the person we had been talking to on line. Good luck OP :-)
 
 
 
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