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How do meet girls in your 20s? Watch

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    Say you're an outgoing fun loving person.. but a little shy on first contact and especially in noisy clubs when it comes to talking to girls.. how do you meet lovely (attractive and great personality) girls when you are in your 20s?
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    If you're an outgoing fun loving person, you must constantly be meeting or being introduced to new women all the time.

    Friends of friends, people you get chatting to in pubs and bars, people from your sports or social clubs, people from work or uni, people from where you live. You must be meeting new people every day, surely?
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    You don't. If you are single by the time you graduate you grow old and die alone.
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    Social groups. :mmm:

    It had to be said.
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    (Original post by Vixen47)
    Social groups. :mmm:

    It had to be said.
    Damn you beat me because of naff phone internet
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    If you're an outgoing fun loving person, you must constantly be meeting or being introduced to new women all the time.

    Friends of friends, people you get chatting to in pubs and bars, people from your sports or social clubs, people from work or uni, people from where you live. You must be meeting new people every day, surely?
    In a male dominated university... there are not many girls here.. it's about 70/30 split.

    Also, the lovely girls here are taken and are therefore by my book off bounds romantically.

    The remaining ones are full of themselves.

    At my uni clubs, there are hardly any girls who aren't about to graduate or are single.

    Also sports wise, the clubs are broken down by gender. (I tried trying out for the women's netball team, but didn't make the cut sigh..)
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    People wonder about this question and think it's an issue of time, etc., but the reality is in a typical week the average person will interact with a bunch of people. The difficult thing is how to turn those fleeting interactions into something more. Your shyness is probably your #1 enemy here.

    If you are already going out to clubs and so on, make an effort to talk to people and connect with them. If you don't want to go up and talk to girls directly, meet some guys, click with them then get them to invite you out with them the next time they go out. The more people you meet, the more girls you'll meet. Work on expanding your social circle and you should be able to meet more girls.
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    (Original post by miser)
    People wonder about this question and think it's an issue of time, etc., but the reality is in a typical week the average person will interact with a bunch of people. The difficult thing is how to turn those fleeting interactions into something more. Your shyness is probably your #1 enemy here.

    If you are already going out to clubs and so on, make an effort to talk to people and connect with them. If you don't want to go up and talk to girls directly, meet some guys, click with them then get them to invite you out with them the next time they go out. The more people you meet, the more girls you'll meet. Work on expanding your social circle and you should be able to meet more girls.
    Agreed.

    In clubs though, how do you actually meet a girl/talk to her? Maybe cos it's my first time in these settings, but I find it impossible to talk to anyone in a club.. the music is blaring out so loudly!

    I think the social circle idea is a good one. Trouble is my course:
    1. Is so hectic, giving me just the evening to socialise.
    2. Unfortunately most of the guys on my course are pretty arrogant, and I can only envisage them either not meeting any girls or only meeting girls like them.

    But I will endeavour to try, thanks!

    Any other tips on how to meet girls or increase your social circle by befriending girls?

    How do you befriend girls and get them to introduce you to other girls?
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    (Original post by pshah2)
    Agreed.

    In clubs though, how do you actually meet a girl/talk to her? Maybe cos it's my first time in these settings, but I find it impossible to talk to anyone in a club.. the music is blaring out so loudly!

    I think the social circle idea is a good one. Trouble is my course:
    1. Is so hectic, giving me just the evening to socialise.
    2. Unfortunately most of the guys on my course are pretty arrogant, and I can only envisage them either not meeting any girls or only meeting girls like them.

    But I will endeavour to try, thanks!

    Any other tips on how to meet girls or increase your social circle by befriending girls?

    How do you befriend girls and get them to introduce you to other girls?
    I'm actually trying to do the same thing at the moment. I graduated a couple of years ago and have let myself become so busy that I don't have people to go out with even when I do get some free time, so I'm willing to talk about this stuff in some detail if you want to shoot me a PM.

    For clubs there are a number of different ways you can do it. One of the easiest is every time you're standing around waiting to order drinks, talk to someone nearby. You can pretty much say anything but something situational would be pretty good. For example "do you know who sings this?" or "cool shoes!" - something you're both aware of. If you can get some chit chat going and exchange names then whenever you see them again later on that evening you can go over and talk to them a lot easier than others because you've already broken the ice. If you want you can ask them "who are you here with?" and "are they cool?" and so on to open up the opportunity to meet their friends. If you find you gel with anyone in particular you can add them on Facebook or something and suggest to go out again in the future. When people drink it opens them up and you can get the whole instant-best-friend thing. Best places to do this sort of stuff will be places where you're part of the targeted demographic so you have things in common with the other people there (university, musical taste, etc.).

    For girls specifically I'm a fan of being upfront since it saves a lot of time and comes across as confident (attractive). Something I might say is, "Hey, you're really cute." Then ask her a question (smiling). You could also say you wanted to talk to her because you liked her style, etc., instead if you want to avoid coming across too strongly (generally speaking the more attractive she is the more confident you should try to be). If she's in a group it's harder since you'd want to say something to the whole group and then only later when they like you you can tell them you're going to borrow their friend (the girl you dig). If there are guys in the group you'll want to open them because they're usually not going to want you to come in and flirt with the girls they know until they think you're cool.

    If you're chatting to a girl and it turns out she has a boyfriend, don't fret it since she's going to have single friends and if you get on well with her she'll be open to introducing you (girls often like to set their friends up). If she doesn't has a boyfriend and she digs you, you probably don't want to get her to introduce you to anyone because you're liable to get jealousy issues.

    To reply to your points:
    1. Don't worry about that too much - most people socialise in the evenings because of daytime commitments too.
    2. If you don't get on well with the people you know, use them as a springboard to meet new people and go from there.

    All of this is easier said than done but the most important thing is to just get out there, have fun, and when people see you having fun they will want to be part of it.
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    (Original post by miser)
    I'm actually trying to do the same thing at the moment. I graduated a couple of years ago and have let myself become so busy that I don't have people to go out with even when I do get some free time, so I'm willing to talk about this stuff in some detail if you want to shoot me a PM.

    For clubs there are a number of different ways you can do it. One of the easiest is every time you're standing around waiting to order drinks, talk to someone nearby. You can pretty much say anything but something situational would be pretty good. For example "do you know who sings this?" or "cool shoes!" - something you're both aware of. If you can get some chit chat going and exchange names then whenever you see them again later on that evening you can go over and talk to them a lot easier than others because you've already broken the ice. If you want you can ask them "who are you here with?" and "are they cool?" and so on to open up the opportunity to meet their friends. If you find you gel with anyone in particular you can add them on Facebook or something and suggest to go out again in the future. When people drink it opens them up and you can get the whole instant-best-friend thing. Best places to do this sort of stuff will be places where you're part of the targeted demographic so you have things in common with the other people there (university, musical taste, etc.).

    For girls specifically I'm a fan of being upfront since it saves a lot of time and comes across as confident (attractive). Something I might say is, "Hey, you're really cute." Then ask her a question (smiling). You could also say you wanted to talk to her because you liked her style, etc., instead if you want to avoid coming across too strongly (generally speaking the more attractive she is the more confident you should try to be). If she's in a group it's harder since you'd want to say something to the whole group and then only later when they like you you can tell them you're going to borrow their friend (the girl you dig). If there are guys in the group you'll want to open them because they're usually not going to want you to come in and flirt with the girls they know until they think you're cool.

    If you're chatting to a girl and it turns out she has a boyfriend, don't fret it since she's going to have single friends and if you get on well with her she'll be open to introducing you (girls often like to set their friends up). If she doesn't has a boyfriend and she digs you, you probably don't want to get her to introduce you to anyone because you're liable to get jealousy issues.

    To reply to your points:
    1. Don't worry about that too much - most people socialise in the evenings because of daytime commitments too.
    2. If you don't get on well with the people you know, use them as a springboard to meet new people and go from there.

    All of this is easier said than done but the most important thing is to just get out there, have fun, and when people see you having fun they will want to be part of it.
    Wow great response!

    See I agree, but thing is I am really busy.. and I'm not that comfortable in a really loud club...

    How do you meet nice girls?
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    I met my GF on Facebook, pretty photo and that is it. Couple of times I tried to meet girls on the street, but I was awful))) WWW is panacea man)
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    (Original post by pshah2)
    Wow great response!

    See I agree, but thing is I am really busy.. and I'm not that comfortable in a really loud club...

    How do you meet nice girls?
    Well, if you see a girl who looks attractive to you, in most situations you really can just go up and try to start a conversation. But that's the kind of thing that takes a lot of practice (not to mention balls).

    If you're not prepared to do that then you have to meet people during social situations which, no matter what way you spin it, does take time out of your day to do.
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    (Original post by miser)
    Well, if you see a girl who looks attractive to you, in most situations you really can just go up and try to start a conversation. But that's the kind of thing that takes a lot of practice (not to mention balls).

    If you're not prepared to do that then you have to meet people during social situations which, no matter what way you spin it, does take time out of your day to do.
    Thanks.

    I'm a complete novice at this tbh. I haven't dated before.

    How do you go up to a girl and talk to her if you're both strangers to each other? I mean I've seen it in the movies, but it never seems the same situation in real life as James Bond or HIMYM or Friends?
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    What do you say/do if you see a girl you think is attractive at a bar or in the mall?
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    Joke with them. I find being a bit cheeky and a tiny bit of arrogance seems to do the trick.
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    (Original post by pshah2)
    Thanks.

    I'm a complete novice at this tbh. I haven't dated before.

    How do you go up to a girl and talk to her if you're both strangers to each other? I mean I've seen it in the movies, but it never seems the same situation in real life as James Bond or HIMYM or Friends?
    Don't do it like in the movies.

    The main key to it is that it must be confident and come across as if it is natural for you to do it. Aside from that you can get away with quite a lot. On the internet talking to women during the day is called 'daygame' so if you want to look at examples of it being done you can just type that into YouTube and you'll find a lot. If you decide you want to give it a go it might be worth finding someone doing it with a similar kind of personality to yours (e.g. introverted vs extraverted, sense of humour, etc.) and picking up tips from them.

    (Original post by pshah2)
    What do you say/do if you see a girl you think is attractive at a bar or in the mall?
    A bar and a mall are usually scenarios that might require a different style of approach. At a bar it's a high-energy environment usually with a lot of competition and unless you are something special she will likely get distracted and/or reject you. At a mall on the other hand there will be no competition and little to be distracting, so in some sense it's easier, but it's harder to escalate because people are more reserved in the day.

    In the daytime I'd recommend saying something like, "hey, I saw you and thought wow you're really cute, so I decided I had to come over and meet you." Then talk about anything (though try not to make it like an interview) and tease/flirt a bit. Then if you get on well suggest doing something and if she agrees get her number. Other ways might be to say, "hey, what way is it to - I'm just joking, I thought you were cute and wanted to come meet you." Or "Hey, I know this is really random but I thought you were adorable and would kick myself if I didn't say hi." In the day you pretty much have to make your intentions clear because if you don't she'll know what's up anyway and it will just look like you're playing games or afraid to be honest.

    At night you can get away with a hell of a lot more and how far you take it probably depends on your personality. You could say "hey, you're sexy as ****!" or just say "hey, I need a girl's opinion on something" and ask a question. You have more flexibility so long as you are fun to be around. It depends on what you feel is right for the situation. Confident girls will tend to respond better to ballsy approaches, whereas shyer girls might get intimidated or put off by them. It's something that takes practice to get an intuition about.
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    (Original post by pshah2)
    Thanks.

    I'm a complete novice at this tbh. I haven't dated before.

    How do you go up to a girl and talk to her if you're both strangers to each other? I mean I've seen it in the movies, but it never seems the same situation in real life as James Bond or HIMYM or Friends?

    How do you talk to anyone?

    Girls are not some strange breed of animal, they're human beings, same as you and I.

    If you saw a bloke, what you you say to him?

    Now say the same thing.
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    (Original post by cole-slaw)
    If you're an outgoing fun loving person, you must constantly be meeting or being introduced to new women all the time.

    Friends of friends, people you get chatting to in pubs and bars, people from your sports or social clubs, people from work or uni, people from where you live. You must be meeting new people every day, surely?
    Not really
    If youve just moved to a new city after uni your friends will probably be in a different city.

    Pubs are full of a much older crowd generally
    Sport or Social Clubs - do they still exist ?
    Uni - not if you graduated
    Work - this is the most likely one but depends on the culture of were you work and again unless your on a large graduate scheme office will be full of older people.

    8-6 your working or traveling be surprised how hard it is to meet new people. If I didnt have friends from 6th form in London I would be screwed.
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    You go upto them and be like hey look at that booty. :sexface:
 
 
 
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