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    Hey, I was wondering if I could get your opinion on my current situation.

    Basically, I'm in my early 20s and going into my last year at uni. Although I have a few female friends, I've never got close to one because of my insecurities, and have always ignored their advances. Because of this, I've never had a girlfriend, never had sex, even though the opportunity has arisen several times.

    Anyway, a couple of weeks ago I decided to ask out a girl that I've known for about a year. She said yes. We had our first kiss but have not done anything past that. I am wondering what would be the right 'gentlemanly' thing to do here.

    Should I tell her, before things start getting a bit more serious, that I have a very hairy chest and stomach, that I have a very small 5" penis and that I have no sexual experience so I will most likely suck in bed? If I was in her position I think I would like to know that information beforehand, as things could be very awkward if I kept it to myself until the time came to remove my clothes.

    Any help or advice on my situation would be greatly appreciated.

    Thanks
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hey, I was wondering if I could get your opinion on my current situation.

    Basically, I'm in my early 20s and going into my last year at uni. Although I have a few female friends, I've never got close to one because of my insecurities, and have always ignored their advances. Because of this, I've never had a girlfriend, never had sex, even though the opportunity has arisen several times.

    Anyway, a couple of weeks ago I decided to ask out a girl that I've known for about a year. She said yes. We had our first kiss but have not done anything past that. I am wondering what would be the right 'gentlemanly' thing to do here.

    Should I tell her, before things start getting a bit more serious, that I have a very hairy chest and stomach, that I have a very small 5" penis and that I have no sexual experience so I will most likely suck in bed? If I was in her position I think I would like to know that information beforehand, as things could be very awkward if I kept it to myself until the time came to remove my clothes.

    Any help or advice on my situation would be greatly appreciated.

    Thanks
    Tbh I'm pretty sure people in your position have got girls and sexual experience by not being quite so self-deprecating (though admittedly that is a source of charm for many - see Hugh Grant).

    Firstly give yourself some credit, you're in your early 20s not you're early 40's. Things aren't that bad. You'd probably be surprised at the number of people that have had to delay sexual encounters for whatever reason, you're not an alien. Plus many girls would see the benefits of not dating a chlamidia-infested sex addict. If you are insecure about your hair on your chest - and other areas for that reason - consult a beautician about waxing. You may also want to see about joining a gym and doing some lifting - there are plenty of help threads on here about this and plenty of helpful staff down at your gym that would be willing to assist you in feeling more confident. You are only going to become more confident if you take ACTION in these areas rather than sitting at home and THINKING and THINKING and THINKING. Additionally quit going over in your head how unattractive you feel, and how terrible you are in bed... if you hang onto these worries they will become self-fulfiling prophesies. You may do well to tell the girl you are a virgin before hand but I would just go straight in, and be confident. Give lots of foreplay, cuddling, kissing, kissing of neck etc to make you both feel more at ease and turned on. Alcohol may help and that other thing... you know lubricant. You shouldn't be so worried about this or it will show in your performance. I once knew a really cocky guy who actually was dead short and therefore I presume must have had the smallest penis, and looked like a small miniature hairy ape, and he had the most beautiful cute little blonde girlfriend in a very long-term relationship. I don't see what he was doing right (other than his annoying hubris ahem) except being confident, open to learning and communicating with his girlfriend. Why should you be any different? You got this girl to say yes to you so why don't you let that put a little kick in your step. This mopey-ness won't get you anywhere. It's your 1st time, you're bound to be a little nervy and unsure but at the end of the day just because it's your 1st doesn't mean you will suck. Just be attentive to all of her body and not self-obsessed. Remember to give, not just receive. Also, if you seriously think everyone who has had sex before is great in bed, that's just bull****. I doubt everyone in their early twenties who has had casual drunken sex is some great lover. At least you're doing this with a girl who actually likes you on some genuine level and if you're open you have time to grow and improve. Hope this helped. Remember, don't think too much, act.
 
 
 
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