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    I never thought this would happen to me but lately, I've been having sexual issues. I'm an otherwise healthy man in my early twenties and I'd had no history of sexual problems before now.

    After quite a long time without having sex, I recently met a woman and we had sex. She turned me on a lot and I'd felt very aroused just thinking about her before and I masturbated to completion the night before while imagining having sex with her but when it came down to actually doing it, I couldn't get a proper erection. I found other ways of pleasuring her but found it very frustrating. We spent the night together and things improved in the morning, to the point that I could get hard enough to penetrate her properly, but although our morning sex went quite well, I didn't get anywhere near ejaculating. I'm worried that I've now blown my chance with this woman. She did everything she could but although my brain was telling me this was very sexy, I found it hard to muster anything but a semi and when I did get erect on the night, it subsided quite quickly.

    Since this incident, I've tried to masturbate but have only managed to hard enough a few times and have only managed to bring it to completion once. For a few months now, I've noticed decreased sensitivity and I've also observed that I produce a lot less pre-ejaculate than previously. I'm really worried that this could really mess up my life now, as I'm at a point where I am not satisfied with being single but I fear this could stop me from having a decent relationship with somebody. I've always felt I had a high sex drive but I'm struggling to get beyond thinking something is erotic. Is this all in my head or might there be something wrong with my penis?

    For next time, I'd appreciate it if anyone had any tips for overcoming this because I fear that even if it is just psychological, the embarrassment and anxiety about this could really affect my sexual performance in the future.
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    I wouldn't worry - sounds like an isolated incident that is playing on your mind. I also doubt very much that she was put off by it - sexual things are really nice for many other reasons and the problems you describe probably made the situation quite intimate. I can't see her being annoyed or thinking any less of you


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    (Original post by whisper2012)
    I wouldn't worry - sounds like an isolated incident that is playing on your mind. I also doubt very much that she was put off by it - sexual things are really nice for many other reasons and the problems you describe probably made the situation quite intimate. I can't see her being annoyed or thinking any less of you


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    That's good to hear - thank you! I was quite happy to get close to her and the fact that I didn't get my shot of pleasure at the end didn't change that. I'm still thinking about possible issues behind my decreased sensitivity but it's reassuring to think that it might just be a one-off that won't mean anything in the future.
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    What whisper2012 said.

    Whenever there is huge expectation, the reality can be different. This will doubtless cure itself soon, and in the meantime enjoy what is happening rather than thinking about what isn't.

    Realising you both like each other enough to do stuff whether or not you have a rock hard erection or come is going to help.
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    Don't let it play on your mind either, the more you think about it the more it interefers. Try to forget it by the next encounter and it should go well. If you try your best to prevent it whilst sex is going on you'll ruin the moment and it'll happen again. Just see it as a one off and you'll be fine.
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    If you are really worried it would be worth popping in to see the GP just in case. Sounds pretty much like performance anxiety to me, you both should try and focus on her pleasure for a few hook ups and get her off and i am sure once the pressure for you to perform is gone you will be flying the flag again
 
 
 
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