Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

Why do girls with boyfriends sometimes lead on single guys? Watch

    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    First of all, disclosure I have female friends and I don't hit on all girls.

    1. I met a girl at uni who I thought was very pretty, seemed to get on with in conversation. In fact, she seemed fairly flirty too. She's on a different course to me. She seemed to have only a few close friends and be more private. I think lots of people were too scared to talk to her as she was drop dead gorgeous. I was in a select few group of guys who got her number and the only one from my course. She played with her hair, and laughed and smiled with me a lot. She exchanged a few texts. One day she said let's meet for coffee too. In fairness I never asked her out or asked about a bf, but then way later on, I found out from someone else that she was engaged. Whaaat? I mean as well as being friendly, I was pretty forward with compliments about her, so I'm not sure why she didn't bring it up. I know there is no "taken" ring on every girl who isn't single, but I felt she was leading me on a bit!

    2. One of my female friends is a feisty attractive spanish girl. I get on well with her, because I listen to her. Some of the others in my hall (including her friends) find her a little too talkative. Although I thought she was pretty, I didn't think of her in that way, just friends. I fancy a few girls in halls and she knows this. She seems to walk in a conversation I am having with my crushes and blanks the other girl, essentially interrupting proceedings! She only does this with hot girls.

    3. The same girl in (2) seems adamant to block me meeting a crush I have on her course. I was told by three friends that this girl has similar interests to me. I saw a picture and she is beautiful! All 3 said that girl (2) should introduce her to me/vice versa. Girl (2) who up until this point was happy to discuss me meeting other girls, quickly changes the subject "No she's not his type". I was hoping crush girl would be invited to a party at halls (as she invited girl 2 and the others to her own birthday party), but nope. Two days later, girl 2 puts her bare feet on my crotch during a game of cards in public. She also sucks her finger suggestively at breakfast the next day from across the room!

    4. As well as fantasising about meeting my crush, I now keep thinking about female friend girl 2. But... get this, I just found out from someone else that she has a long distance boyfriend!


    I feel uncomfortable now as I wasn't trying to hit on a girl who was engaged nor enjoy a footjob from a girl with a boyfriend.

    Does this happen often?!
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    It happens all the time, everywhere!! Anything to dig for compliments.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    She didn't lead you on, guys get the wrong impression. Some guys seem to think if a girl smiles at you she wants to get you in bed and take your shoes off.
    Offline

    3
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by CryptoidAlien)
    She didn't lead you on, guys get the wrong impression. Some guys seem to think if a girl smiles at you she wants to get you in bed and take your shoes off.
    Some guys are admittedly like that, but some girls blatantly lead people on, then laugh at them with a large group of friends when they show an interest
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    Smiling is leading someone on now...?

    Goodness knows how I'm gonna break it off with those people I politely greeted today. :lolwut:
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by CryptoidAlien)
    She didn't lead you on, guys get the wrong impression. Some guys seem to think if a girl smiles at you she wants to get you in bed and take your shoes off.
    Haha i get your point. I was trying to be brief here. But our interactions included her touching my arm or a lot of texts, flirting both ways. She would compliment my appearance or walk with me to the tube etc.

    As in it wasn't just smiling. If I'd known she was with someone, let alone moving toward engagement, then I would have been friendly, but not been so flirty
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Freudian Slip)
    Smiling is leading someone on now...?

    Goodness knows how I'm gonna break it off with those people I politely greeted today. :lolwut:
    Haha okay not just smiling, but she touched my hand, arm when speaking, she used to be really flirty.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by nohomo)
    Some guys are admittedly like that, but some girls blatantly lead people on, then laugh at them with a large group of friends when they show an interest
    Agreed. Need to have a Is she single app that scans your vicinity and tells you who is single in the room.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Maybe they play games each other?
    Maybe she's naive and doesn't know what she's doing?
    Or maybe she gets a kick out of it?

    What I do know is it's not gender specific and good communication skills wouldn't go awry.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    1. They love the attention.
    2. They are teasers - just love to tease guys as they get off on it.
    3. To have a backup guy.
    4. To potentially cheat.
    5. They love to control men.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    In all honesty, girls like it when guys pay them compliments. (this is coming from a girl just so you know) But just because we smile a lot around you, laugh at your jokes, pay you compliments and act polite around you, doesnt mean that we're leading you on. Some of us are just really nice and friendly ok? Notice I said "some".
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Joan5626)
    In all honesty, girls like it when guys pay them compliments. (this is coming from a girl just so you know) But just because we smile a lot around you, laugh at your jokes, pay you compliments and act polite around you, doesnt mean that we're leading you on. Some of us are just really nice and friendly ok? Notice I said "some".
    Fair point. Not all girls or guys lead the others on.

    But some of them, phew, they sure do get touchy, and laugh at your jokes and breast block you from other girls only to reveal as this girl as in OP's thread that they have a bf. I think these types like control, like to tease, and have little regard for the damage they leave in their wake as they find a back up.
    Offline

    5
    ReputationRep:
    Because they're whores.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by rahulchopra30)
    Fair point. Not all girls or guys lead the others on.

    But some of them, phew, they sure do get touchy, and laugh at your jokes and breast block you from other girls only to reveal as this girl as in OP's thread that they have a bf. I think these types like control, like to tease, and have little regard for the damage they leave in their wake as they find a back up.
    Yea I agree with you on that one. There are some girls who seek attention like that.

    But I guess it's safe to say that we shouldn't just assume. It's always better to ask, like in this case, to have asked if she had a boyfriend, instead of just thinking that she doesn't because of how you two talk, interact etc.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Joan5626)
    Yea I agree with you on that one. There are some girls who seek attention like that.

    But I guess it's safe to say that we shouldn't just assume. It's always better to ask, like in this case, to have asked if she had a boyfriend, instead of just thinking that she doesn't because of how you two talk, interact etc.
    But if a girl behaves in a flirty way like to OP, then I would have thought it should be brought up by the girl even casually, especially if she knows he's single.
    • Thread Starter
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Joan5626)
    In all honesty, girls like it when guys pay them compliments. (this is coming from a girl just so you know) But just because we smile a lot around you, laugh at your jokes, pay you compliments and act polite around you, doesnt mean that we're leading you on. Some of us are just really nice and friendly ok? Notice I said "some".
    Totally understand that. Not every girl is like this. I have plenty of nice female friends like yourself who are fun. With this one though, she has been flirting in her banter, and also has put her feet on my crotch when sitting down sometimes. Also, I distinctly felt her move her toes a little whilst she did this. It was in public, so I didn't know what to do! She has also suggestively sucked her finger at me at breakfast from the other end of the table. And some of her texts, like 'hey sexy one' have got me confused. She has never mentioned a bf. I don't envisage her as a potential girlfriend, but her flirting and touching have got me aroused. I mean I keep thinking of her feet and her mouth.

    What to do? Help!! Also why would she do this? I also just found out from a third party which I later confirmed with this girl's friends that she already has a long distance bf.

    (Original post by rahulchopra30)
    1. They love the attention.
    2. They are teasers - just love to tease guys as they get off on it.
    3. To have a backup guy.
    4. To potentially cheat.
    5. They love to control men.
    Yeah I think this one is a teaser. Maybe she wants me as a backup.

    I know another girl on my own course, who is flirty. I don't know if she is single, but I think of her a lot. We're friends at the moment. But see she isn't a controller.

    This other one though is a bit crazy.
    Offline

    19
    ReputationRep:
    Some girls love attention. This is why you don't beat around the bush and wind up in the nice guy pet ***** category, you take the bull by the horns from the outset, but in a smooth/low energy way, so you don't look like a keeno and the girl doesn't feel in any way threatened or awkward about letting you down gently
    Offline

    11
    ReputationRep:
    Attention.
    SOME girls are hardwired to be fun & flirty.
    Admittedly many girls flirt with guys in my school, join the confusion club mate.
    It's normal.
    Offline

    18
    ReputationRep:
    Since they consider themselves attractive enough to get a boyfriend, the single guy is a backup man.
    Offline

    6
    ReputationRep:
    :rolleyes: why do boys with girlfriends lead on single girls? Why do people cheat on their spouses? etc, etc.

    People get bored. People feel trapped. A myriad of reasons.

    When I used to do it, I did it because my boyfriend made me feel like **** and I did it to get back at him for doing the same.
    (Thankfully we're much more mature now, but y'know, teenagers.)
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: November 24, 2014
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    What newspaper do you read/prefer?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.