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    I have had this problem for MONTHS, to the point where it is too ridiculous to admit. I am 18, in college and I am itching for a girlfriend because I haven't had a relationship for almost 7 long years.

    I approached a girl 8 months ago, she didn't directly reject me but I could tell that she wasn't interested. Ever since then, I have chickened out! I don't understand it. I have gained myself a lot of confidence among friends, going out etc. and I have self-esteem. I had OCD and Anxiety the past few months too but I have recently overcome that.

    I was itching to approach this girl I know that lives nearby and I know for a fact that I should not be afraid to approach. I was in the right mindset. I told myself that it is stupid to let an opportunity go past; it is stupid to care what people think; just be positive etc. And, on a daily basis - I don't care what people think, I be myself. But whenever there is a beautiful girl, and my intention is to approach her, I chicken out! I really cannot comprehend why I am doing this. Plus, I am not a bad-looking guy as I am noticeable and girls always give me "the glance". Even the girl I am trying to approach has glanced at me a lot!

    Much advice and help would be great! I beating myself mentally here!
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    It sounds to me like you're scared of rejection and how it makes you or would make you feel and this in turn is playing on the anxiety you already suffer from (which can come and go), which is completely understandable and normal I have been there myself. It's nothing you can't get over or work on, you just have to keep reminding yourself that there is nothing wrong with being rejected, not everyone will like you back but many will.

    Now go get that girl tiger, and if you don't get that one get the next one
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    Could it also be the feeling of intimidation? The reason I ask is because she is so pretty, she is "my type" of girl and I really fine her attractive. The irrational fear of rejection and the fact that she is so pretty may play a huge role.
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    Unless you are rich, good looking or famous or all three, you will get rejection.

    There are no ways around it if you want a relationship. Just get asking, get a good technique, there are loads of advice about this on the net and if you get rejected move on.

    The only alternative is not having a GF.
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    (Original post by AnEvolvedApe)
    Could it also be the feeling of intimidation? The reason I ask is because she is so pretty, she is "my type" of girl and I really fine her attractive. The irrational fear of rejection and the fact that she is so pretty may play a huge role.
    Yes that could also effect your nerves, do you have a tendency to think pretty girls are out of your league?
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    (Original post by Maker)
    Unless you are rich, good looking or famous or all three, you will get rejection.

    There are no ways around it if you want a relationship. Just get asking, get a good technique, there are loads of advice about this on the net and if you get rejected move on.

    The only alternative is not having a GF.
    Even if you are rich, good looking, famous or all 3 you will still get some rejection
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    (Original post by SophieSmall)
    Even if you are rich, good looking, famous or all 3 you will still get some rejection
    Since I am none of those, I never get rejection!
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    (Original post by SophieSmall)
    Yes that could also effect your nerves, do you have a tendency to think pretty girls are out of your league?
    That might be the motive. The first girl I ever approached which was 8 months ago has that elegant, sophisticated, 'rich' style and she was the one who wasn't interested in me. This girl I like now is just as beautiful but she instead seems like she has less expectations than the other girl. But, I still cannot do it.
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    It's called approach anxiety and almost all men get it to some degree or another. It also almost never goes away, even if you approach consistently for a long time, but it does get easier to handle if you approach often. There aren't any other ways around this - you need to do the approaches and begin to internalise the realisation that it's not that bad. Consciously thinking it's not that bad isn't enough - you have to win over your subconscious. You have to get out there and do it, and the more you do it the less of a big deal it will become.
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    (Original post by AnEvolvedApe)
    That might be the motive. The first girl I ever approached which was 8 months ago has that elegant, sophisticated, 'rich' style and she was the one who wasn't interested in me. This girl I like now is just as beautiful but she instead seems like she has less expectations than the other girl. But, I still cannot do it.
    You can do it it'll be scary at first but you can do it, have you thought about how you wanted to approach here?
    also if you believe in leagues you should probably stop believing in them right now because they are a load of nonsense. Only complete *****es and jackasses believe they are out of someone's league and I doubt you'd want to be in a relationship with someone like that anyway
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    **** that, you don't need a relationship, you need a career.
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    (Original post by Maker)
    Unless you are rich, good looking or famous or all three, you will get rejection.
    its funny when people give advice on things they clearly know little about
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    I aim to be more social too; to start going out often and meeting new people. But, like I said, I am confident and I am not afraid of people at all. It just seems to be the weird consistent problem of approach anxiety. I think it is not so much rejection either because I have always not given a damn about it - if the girl doesn't like me then I move on to the next, simple as that. I can't 100% draw a conclusion as to what is causing it apart from the intimidation of appearance. Maybe it is just hard-wired into my brain after all these years in having social anxiety which I have only for the past 12 months have improved on (or overcome rather).
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    (Original post by shawn_o1)
    **** that, you don't need a relationship, you need a career.
    this ^
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    (Original post by BullViagra)
    its funny when people give advice on things they clearly know little about
    I don't think Brad Cooper is on TSR.
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    grow some balls man. i approached a girl on Saturday and got **** blocked by her friends because she was in a group of girls. i went up to the group alone and i didn't care what happens.
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    (Original post by EatAndRevise)
    this ^
    This ^ ^


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