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    i was just wondering if you have been attracted to someone, got to know them and they start to like you and they are really nice, you start picking flaws with them about their appearance and personality and push them away ( not literally) . It seems so shallow but i cannot help it i do not know why i do this because they are amazing guys. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks
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    I think everyone does this. Once you start to like someone your defences come out because you don't want to get hurt. You start to look for bad things about them because you've likely been hurt before and want to make sure it doesn't happen again?

    The higher the level of attraction you demand, the more picky you are going to be. All the time you will scrutinise until you find something that's 'iffy'. It is shallow, but it's human. It's just how some people are.

    All I can advise is to try and lower your standards, so you still want someone attractive but not 'very beautiful'?

    Easier said than done though, I know.
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    (Original post by lee1985)
    I think everyone does this. Once you start to like someone your defences come out because you don't want to get hurt. You start to look for bad things about them because you've likely been hurt before and want to make sure it doesn't happen again?

    The higher the level of attraction you demand, the more picky you are going to be. All the time you will scrutinise until you find something that's 'iffy'. It is shallow, but it's human. It's just how some people are.

    All I can advise is to try and lower your standards, so you still want someone attractive but not 'very beautiful'?

    Easier said than done though, I know.
    it depends weather i am attracted to them....other people don't have to find them good looking. This sounds lame but have never had a bf before and im 16. I haven't been hurt in a relationship as i have never had one. I really do not know why i do this. I feel so bad yet i cant help it
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    You know what's weird. Weird.
 
 
 
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