So, I'd noticed during my last few months at uni, these friends from my course, who I've been really close to since our first day at uni, had started to invite me out less and less with them, days/nights out, not really making any effort with me, not getting in touch for 2/3 months unless I initiated the conversation.
We graduated recently and on the day I tried to avoid them as much as possible, because it was making me feel so crappy to be around them. I did make the effort to be in some group shots, but they barely spoke to me, kept wandering off as a group and leaving me standing on my own. It wasn't subtle either, my family all noticed.
During the day a few came over and spoke a little to me, with the exception of 1 girl. She only met us during second year, and ignores me, makes a point of tagging everyone on instagram in group shots but me etc. During graduation day, she would literally turn her back on me to block me out of the circle of conversation.
Tonight is a graduation ball. One of the girls said they would let me know the plans, but has only told me now that I messaged her and asked. They are all meeting at a mutual friends house, who is really friendly with me still, but I'm just in two minds whether to even go or not. They could be really friendly and fine with me all night, but I can see in my head this one girl asking me to take all the photos so I'm not in them, ignoring me and making very little effort. Or, even worse, they just be rude and ignore me or act stand-offish all night. Plus, once these girls have had a drink, they can become very nasty.
It's really up to me to decide whether to ask if I can go with them, but I don't want to feel like sh*t on my last night at uni. I also don't want to miss out on the event, but I have no-one else to go with at all. It just all feels very much like I'm back in y9! Please help!
Summary: "Friends" been ignoring me/acting stand-offish for the last few months. Ball tonight, should I go? Don't want to feel like sh*t, but don't want to miss out. No-one else to go with.
"Friends" being stand-offish and rude Watch
- Thread Starter
- 17-07-2014 13:24
- 17-07-2014 14:57
I think it's clear something has happened for them to be frosty with you. Whether it's an obvious situation or something more implicit, maybe you can identify what it is.
Unfortunately, whilst you may have had every reason to have avoided them (because of the way they've made you feel) it's probably given them more "ammo" to treat you coldly, or re-enforced their decision to treat you coldly; potentially exacerbating the issue.
Importantly though, whilst it's MUCH easier said than done, try not to focus on people ignoring you- you said there is one friend who is still friendly, so have more to do with him or her....after all, it is your graduation ball, it should be happy occasion where you're celebrating years of hard work. Don't let other people ruin it for you. You want to look back and think of it as a fun night.