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From date to hookup- how? Watch

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    I was wondering : how exactly does one suggest a hookup at the end of a date (well obviously not "lets screw", more of a "lets go back to your/my place")?

    I've started using Tinder and I think the reputation of that app precedes it meaning that people on there may be not that averse to hookups. (for the record, I'm a guy looking for girls).

    I understand that by no means does a date have to end in sex but if it were to, how would I go about initiating it.

    So recently I went on a date with someone from there and we had been talking about hookups in general while chatting over messages and it seemed to me that she was open to them.
    Then when it got to the end of our date (which went really well- several drinks and never a drop off in conversation), it just got kind of awkward and I didn't know what to say, so we went our separate ways. But based on how we had chatted before, I think that a different end to the evening wouldn't have been unreasonable either.

    My questions are:

    1) Girls: if you're open to hooking up with a guy after a date, do you give any signs/signals/hints?

    2) Guys: how do you subtly suggest going back to someone's place after a date? "Your place or mine or each to their own?"
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    You kind of just know. It's definitely an instinctive thing that becomes more obvious the more it happens.


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    end of date. hug > turns to making out > turns to "yours or mine"
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    (Original post by iamu)
    end of date. hug > turns to making out > turns to "yours or mine"
    How do you turn a hug into making out? A hug is a natural end to a date but from there? Just go for it?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    How do you turn a hug into making out? A hug is a natural end to a date but from there? Just go for it?
    I think you should learn to read body language . It should be fairly easy to tell if someone is into you.


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    (Original post by LightBlueSoldier)
    I think you should learn to read body language . It should be fairly easy to tell if someone is into you.
    I'm afraid I'm not that smooth to be able to tell that. I know how to ask girls out and how to talk to them but that skill I've yet to master.
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    You learn by doing.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I'm afraid I'm not that smooth to be able to tell that. I know how to ask girls out and how to talk to them but that skill I've yet to master.
    It just takes practice. Focus on the other person.


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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    How do you turn a hug into making out? A hug is a natural end to a date but from there? Just go for it?
    If you've both had a great time, then maybe she'll hint you. It's the gaze with which she looks at you! And then there are a lot of guides on the internet how to guess if a girl wants her to kiss you... of course easier said than done but nothing happens without practice. If you are lucky she may kiss you first.
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    You invite them to yours. If they say yes chances are they wanna hook up and it'll just happen.
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    (Original post by xOHarriet)
    You invite them to yours. If they say yes chances are they wanna hook up and it'll just happen.
    If a girl doesn't want to hook up on that particular date, and you explicitly ask her to, it generally harms your chances of ever managing it. Better to infer.


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    invite her to your place, get some nice scented candles, hold her hands, say something about her eyes
    Spoiler:
    Show
    You eyes are like the waters of Tahiti, I just want to swim in them :sexface:
    tell her you love her, GET IN THERE OP, then delete her off facebook and resume life as normal :yep:
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    (Original post by LightBlueSoldier)
    If a girl doesn't want to hook up on that particular date, and you explicitly ask her to, it generally harms your chances of ever managing it. Better to infer.


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    Yeah but if all you're looking for is an easy shag why are you bothering with a girl with morals? Sticking it out and making her think you're actually into her is low.
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    (Original post by xOHarriet)
    You invite them to yours. If they say yes chances are they wanna hook up and it'll just happen.
    What about if her place is much more closer and convenient (as it was the case in the story in my original post)?

    But say I were to invite her back to mine: is it simply "want to come back to my place and watch a movie or something?"

    (Original post by LightBlueSoldier)
    It just takes practice. Focus on the other person.
    (Original post by HawkEyeArcher)
    If you've both had a great time, then maybe she'll hint you. It's the gaze with which she looks at you! And then there are a lot of guides on the internet how to guess if a girl wants her to kiss you... of course easier said than done but nothing happens without practice. If you are lucky she may kiss you first.
    This might be the place to mention that I'm 25 and didn't get my first ever kiss/gf/sex until I was 24 so this is all still very new to me and the whole learning process of how to deal with the opposite sex in your late teens and early 20s/uni passed me by so I'm a bit handicapped here.
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    (Original post by xOHarriet)
    Yeah but if all you're looking for is an easy shag why are you bothering with a girl with morals? Sticking it out and making her think you're actually into her is low.
    I would never go on a date with someone unless I thought there was a chance I would end up in a relationship with them. If all I want is sex...well that's what clubs are for isn't it?


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    You could just ask. Hey do you want to have sexual intercourse with me?

    It might ruin the mood. But at least it was put out there.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)

    But say I were to invite her back to mine: is it simply "want to come back to my place and watch a movie or something?"






    .
    No. Asking someone back to yours is in almost all cases code for 'do you want to sleep with me?'

    I think most girls will understand if you're a bit inexperienced. It's not the end of the world.


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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    What about if her place is much more closer and convenient (as it was the case in the story in my original post)?

    But say I were to invite her back to mine: is it simply "want to come back to my place and watch a movie or something?"
    Well that's a bit awkward because you can't really just invite yourself in. Ask if she wants to come to yours, if she's interested she'll be like "Naa, my place is closer, come to mine".

    And yeah something like that. Or "I've got some beers at mine if you fancy another drink"

    (Original post by LightBlueSoldier)
    I would never go on a date with someone unless I thought there was a chance I would end up in a relationship with them. If all I want is sex...well that's what clubs are for isn't it?


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    That's what guys think clubs are for. For us girls it's just somewhere to dance.
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    You could literally ask 'do you mind if I kiss you', as a girl I'd think that was fine and quite sweet rather then possibly breaching my comfort without clear consent
    • #1
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    (Original post by LightBlueSoldier)
    No. Asking someone back to yours is in almost all cases code for 'do you want to sleep with me?'

    I think most girls will understand if you're a bit inexperienced. It's not the end of the world.
    ]
    What do you mean understand? As in 'this guy doesn't know what he's doing-next!'
    At 25 being inexperienced is a bad thing.
 
 
 
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