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Can you be too honest in relationships? Watch

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    A few of us were talking about this in another thread. It ended in quite a heated debate, so I think it's worth having a proper conversation about here.

    Should you be completely honest in your relationship? Or are a few white lies okay?

    Do you think it's possible to be too honest?

    Where do you draw the line?
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    A white lie is still a lie.

    Honesty in a relationship is important but sometimes it pays to not reveal too much.
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    (Original post by Alfissti)
    A white lie is still a lie.

    Honesty in a relationship is important but sometimes it pays to not reveal too much.
    When do you think you should hold back...?

    Do you think not saying something is the same as being dishonest...?
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    No its best to be 100% honest.
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    I don't think there is such a thing as being too honest in a relationship, however there is a difference between being honest and not saying things that don't need to be said.
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    (Original post by Coxy124)
    however there is a difference between being honest and not saying things that don't need to be said.
    I agree, although I think there a lots of people who don't think there's a difference.
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    Well lying is a quick way to cause chaos I think.
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    Witholding some stuff is absolutely necessary. There are things that are bound to upset you or your partner that need not be said. I had a dream last night that I cheated on my partner. Would I ever do that? No way in hell, never even consciously thought about it, but if i told her she'd get upset and rightly so. What would telling her achieve?
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    (Original post by Puddles the Monkey)
    I agree, although I think there a lots of people who don't think there's a difference.
    I can see what you mean. I maintain honesty in my relationships completely but there is a difference between honesty and just being blunt. So things like worries or problems in the relationship should be openly and honestly discussed in a relationship as communication is key. But things like "Oh I hate your Mother" (Hypothetically speaking in case my girlfriend reads this haha) are unnecessary.
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    Hmm, maybe don't reveal your entire hand e.g. if you watch depraved videos and get a kick out of it, maybe don't mention that..
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    (Original post by Coxy124)
    I can see what you mean. I maintain honesty in my relationships completely but there is a difference between honesty and just being blunt. So things like worries or problems in the relationship should be openly and honestly discussed in a relationship as communication is key. But things like "Oh I hate your Mother" (Hypothetically speaking in case my girlfriend reads this haha) are unnecessary.
    I guess it's about working out what's important and what's not important, and being honest about the important stuff?

    Although if you really hate her mother, that might be important.
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    (Original post by Puddles the Monkey)
    I guess it's about working out what's important and what's not important, and being honest about the important stuff?

    Although if you really hate her mother, that might be important.
    No I don't haha, her family is lovely.
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    (Original post by AbdulKoyes)
    Hmm, maybe don't reveal your entire hand e.g. if you watch depraved videos and get a kick out of it, maybe don't mention that..
    Hm, well that depends. What kind of videos?

    Depending on what they are that could lead to a huge feeling of betrayal if your SO later discovers you've been looking at these things and you've kept that part of yourself hidden.
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    (Original post by Coxy124)
    No I don't haha, her family is lovely.
    Well saved
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    (Original post by Alfissti)
    A white lie is still a lie.

    Honesty in a relationship is important but sometimes it pays to not reveal too much.
    It's a shame it has to be this way. The whole point of a relationship is to be as open as possible. Obviously how open you are depends on the longevity of your relationship, whether you're married etc etc.
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    (Original post by Over2you)
    It's a shame it has to be this way. The whole point of a relationship is to be as open as possible. Obviously how open you are depends on the longevity of your relationship, whether you're married etc etc.
    I don't think it has to be this way... does it?
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    (Original post by Puddles the Monkey)
    I don't think it has to be this way... does it?
    This was quite possibly the quickest reply i have ever received to a message haha.

    I guess what i was trying to say is that it's a shame the guy feels "it pays not to be too honest". I don't think that's a general rule. Was just applying it to the poster.
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    I think its better to be honest since it's going to come out anyway and the sooner it comes out the better
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    (Original post by Over2you)
    This was quite possibly the quickest reply i have ever received to a message haha.

    I guess what i was trying to say is that it's a shame the guy feels "it pays not to be too honest". I don't think that's a general rule. Was just applying it to the poster.
    Ahh I see.

    I wonder if it gets easier to be more honest and open as you get older and more experienced in relationships?
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    (Original post by Puddles the Monkey)
    Ahh I see.

    I wonder if it gets easier to be more honest and open as you get older and more experienced in relationships?
    which is exactly what i believe/was trying to say
 
 
 
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