Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

I have love addiction problems, can't stop staring at women. Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Hi.


    Got a massive problem. I'm 23 and male with a lot of sexual shame. I seem to have a lot of love addiction problems and especially a strong need of approval from beautiful women. I'm still a virgin and seriously considering paying for it. I feel a lot of shame in wanting to ask women out and sleep with them because everyone thinks i'm a nerd who will never deserve a woman or love

    I can't get past secondary school and all the negative **** that happened to me. I'm working on forgiving all the people who ruined that experience for me. It's easy at times and hard during others.

    There's a girl i work with who i think likes me, she's really hot and all the guys in the office fancy her but i'm not sure if i have the guts to ask her out because everyone thinks they're so much better than me and that i'm not worthy of her love. We've spent a bit of time with each other at work and i think i'm falling for her. I don't really know what to do.

    Our job requires a lot of guts and i can do that but when it comes to women, then i just can't do it. I'm considering seeing a sex therapist because it's extremely abnormal for a young, healthy male like myself to be having this much trouble with my sexuality. I feel like i do not deserve to have somebody who will love me.

    I spend every day constantly trying to prove myself to other people that i'm worthy of love. Its so exhausting because everyone seems like i bother them with my presence or something.

    What can i do??
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi.


    Got a massive problem. I'm 23 and male with a lot of sexual shame. I seem to have a lot of love addiction problems and especially a strong need of approval from beautiful women. I'm still a virgin and seriously considering paying for it. I feel a lot of shame in wanting to ask women out and sleep with them because everyone thinks i'm a nerd who will never deserve a woman or love

    I can't get past secondary school and all the negative **** that happened to me. I'm working on forgiving all the people who ruined that experience for me. It's easy at times and hard during others.

    There's a girl i work with who i think likes me, she's really hot and all the guys in the office fancy her but i'm not sure if i have the guts to ask her out because everyone thinks they're so much better than me and that i'm not worthy of her love. We've spent a bit of time with each other at work and i think i'm falling for her. I don't really know what to do.

    Our job requires a lot of guts and i can do that but when it comes to women, then i just can't do it. I'm considering seeing a sex therapist because it's extremely abnormal for a young, healthy male like myself to be having this much trouble with my sexuality. I feel like i do not deserve to have somebody who will love me.

    I spend every day constantly trying to prove myself to other people that i'm worthy of love. Its so exhausting because everyone seems like i bother them with my presence or something.

    What can i do??
    Sorry, what do you do not prove to others that you are worthy of love???

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    20
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi.


    Got a massive problem. I'm 23 and male with a lot of sexual shame. I seem to have a lot of love addiction problems and especially a strong need of approval from beautiful women. I'm still a virgin and seriously considering paying for it. I feel a lot of shame in wanting to ask women out and sleep with them because everyone thinks i'm a nerd who will never deserve a woman or love

    I can't get past secondary school and all the negative **** that happened to me. I'm working on forgiving all the people who ruined that experience for me. It's easy at times and hard during others.

    There's a girl i work with who i think likes me, she's really hot and all the guys in the office fancy her but i'm not sure if i have the guts to ask her out because everyone thinks they're so much better than me and that i'm not worthy of her love. We've spent a bit of time with each other at work and i think i'm falling for her. I don't really know what to do.

    Our job requires a lot of guts and i can do that but when it comes to women, then i just can't do it. I'm considering seeing a sex therapist because it's extremely abnormal for a young, healthy male like myself to be having this much trouble with my sexuality. I feel like i do not deserve to have somebody who will love me.

    I spend every day constantly trying to prove myself to other people that i'm worthy of love. Its so exhausting because everyone seems like i bother them with my presence or something.

    What can i do??
    If you think she might like you then just go for it. Ask her out for a coffee or a drink, that doesn't necessarily mean you're asking her out in a romantic way, could just be as friends. I say just go for it, even if she does say no then you'll have at least had the courage to do it.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by PrincePauper)
    Sorry, what do you do not prove to others that you are worthy of love???

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Come again?
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    All I really got from that is "I have a problem where I like people for entirely superficial reasons but don't like it when others judge me for entirely superficial reasons."
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hi.


    Got a massive problem. I'm 23 and male with a lot of sexual shame. I seem to have a lot of love addiction problems and especially a strong need of approval from beautiful women. I'm still a virgin and seriously considering paying for it. I feel a lot of shame in wanting to ask women out and sleep with them because everyone thinks i'm a nerd who will never deserve a woman or love

    I can't get past secondary school and all the negative **** that happened to me. I'm working on forgiving all the people who ruined that experience for me. It's easy at times and hard during others.

    There's a girl i work with who i think likes me, she's really hot and all the guys in the office fancy her but i'm not sure if i have the guts to ask her out because everyone thinks they're so much better than me and that i'm not worthy of her love. We've spent a bit of time with each other at work and i think i'm falling for her. I don't really know what to do.

    Our job requires a lot of guts and i can do that but when it comes to women, then i just can't do it. I'm considering seeing a sex therapist because it's extremely abnormal for a young, healthy male like myself to be having this much trouble with my sexuality. I feel like i do not deserve to have somebody who will love me.

    I spend every day constantly trying to prove myself to other people that i'm worthy of love. Its so exhausting because everyone seems like i bother them with my presence or something.

    What can i do??
    you have something called love shyness

    read up on it, and see if you resonate with it
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by thetrickyfox)
    All I really got from that is "I have a problem where I like people for entirely superficial reasons but don't like it when others judge me for entirely superficial reasons."
    I agree with the first part but not the second, explain yourself.
    Offline

    17
    ReputationRep:
    What's so hard about asking her out for a coffee or drink?
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I agree with the first part but not the second, explain yourself.
    "because everyone thinks i'm a nerd who will never deserve a woman or love."
    "
    because everyone thinks they're so much better than me and that i'm not worthy of her love."

    Other people judging you for superficial reasons. Your confidence is affected by others with baseless perceptions of you.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by LostGear)
    What's so hard about asking her out for a coffee or drink?
    If she says no, then i'll feel stupid for even thinking that she'd even consider say yes.

    If she says yes then i'll panic cos i won't know what to do and i'll just **** it up.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by thetrickyfox)
    "because everyone thinks i'm a nerd who will never deserve a woman or love."
    "
    [COLOR=#505050]because everyone thinks they're so much better than me and that i'm not worthy of her love."

    Other people judging you for superficial reasons. Your confidence is affected by others with baseless perceptions of you.
    [/COLOR]
    Not quite sure what this means.

    So basically you think im a ****????
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Not quite sure what this means.

    So basically you think im a ****????
    I don't think you're anything, I know nothing about you. All it means is that you like people for superficial reasons and in the same sentence complain about how others judge you for equally superficial reasons. I think you need to deal with your own ****ty self image and that might stop you from crushing on every objectively attractive person you see.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by thetrickyfox)
    I don't think you're anything, I know nothing about you. All it means is that you like people for superficial reasons and in the same sentence complain about how others judge you for equally superficial reasons. I think you need to deal with your own ****ty self image and that might stop you from crushing on every objectively attractive person you see.
    Any idea/s how?
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Any idea/s how?
    If you want a therapy session you might as well PM me or something, I could go on at length about ****ty self image but to give useful advice I'd need to know more about you personally.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by thetrickyfox)
    If you want a therapy session you might as well PM me or something, I could go on at length about ****ty self image but to give useful advice I'd need to know more about you personally.
    Before i do, have you ever done this before, are you a professional or do you have a lot of experience with it?
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Before i do, have you ever done this before, are you a professional or do you have a lot of experience with it?
    Uh I'm not actually going to give you therapy, it's just advice. As for my qualifications, does attending 7 years of group/ single therapy myself count? It's up to you, I'm not your mother and I don't lose anything by you not speaking to me.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    Love addiction? Isn't that when you're already in a relationship but it's abusive and you still stay? It seems to me you're just a virgin who is struggling to get laid Well you said you're a virgin lol and you're clearly struggling. Why do people put tags on things that don't apply >.<
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: July 28, 2014
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    What newspaper do you read/prefer?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.