Girlfriend's messy life is grinding my gears. Watch

Anonymous #1
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Girlfriend of several years recently moved in with me. It wasn't long before I left for a 4 week trip after she had moved in.

Her mess of a life is really getting on my nerves. Prior to her moving in everything in the house was neat and spotlessly clean.

I returned from my home country and the place looks as if the London Blitz just happened in the house.

Shoe racks and cabinets are empty because all her stupid shoes are everywhere she choose to take it off.
Not a single piece of clean dish or cutlery as some seem to have not been washed for a decade.
Bedroom floor seems to have a new floor cover made from all her dirty clothes.
Then there is the car, I mean seriously we bought a brand new car the day we moved in and now it has a new floor mat, except it is made from rubbish and her shoes. The whole time I was gone it seems she never ever bothered to bring the car for a wash even once.

Then there are the bills in the house, there are 2 bills that needed to be paid during my absence and it still isn't paid.

I just don't understand how someone can be smart enough to hold a £6k per month job but can live in such a pigsty.

Then there is her money management skills, she makes £6k per month and every month can't even save £6 let alone £60 each month.

I got ticked off and told her to get a grip on her life instead she places all her income in my bank account and gives me all her bills then tells me to take care of everything.

I'm so sick and tired of her antics.

Really feel like kicking her out but her name is on the tenancy and we also have a house we just bought.

Advice to deal with such kinds?
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stargirl63
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#2
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(Original post by Anonymous)
Girlfriend of several years recently moved in with me. It wasn't long before I left for a 4 week trip after she had moved in.

Her mess of a life is really getting on my nerves. Prior to her moving in everything in the house was neat and spotlessly clean.

I returned from my home country and the place looks as if the London Blitz just happened in the house.

Shoe racks and cabinets are empty because all her stupid shoes are everywhere she choose to take it off.
Not a single piece of clean dish or cutlery as some seem to have not been washed for a decade.
Bedroom floor seems to have a new floor cover made from all her dirty clothes.
Then there is the car, I mean seriously we bought a brand new car the day we moved in and now it has a new floor mat, except it is made from rubbish and her shoes. The whole time I was gone it seems she never ever bothered to bring the car for a wash even once.

Then there are the bills in the house, there are 2 bills that needed to be paid during my absence and it still isn't paid.

I just don't understand how someone can be smart enough to hold a £6k per month job but can live in such a pigsty.

Then there is her money management skills, she makes £6k per month and every month can't even save £6 let alone £60 each month.

Maybe it's all the shoes?

You need to set a cleaning rota or something. It's not ideal, but by the sounds of things you need it.

And eeww.
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by stargirl63)
Maybe it's all the shoes?

You need to set a cleaning rota or something. It's not ideal, but by the sounds of things you need it.

And eeww.
There is a cleaning rota she drew up but is always disregarded.

Usually she just starts doing it, does 5% then sits down to watch tv. In the end it is me who has to complete it otherwise it just doesn't get done.
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Kaneda
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Is she hot?


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tígertíger
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My boyfriend can be a little messy. He does the Bruce Almighty strip as soon as he gets in from work so I'm forever picking up his clothes, and after three years I can count the amount of times he's used the washing machine on one hand - however, we're both on the same page when it comes to cleanliness and that makes all the difference. I think you need to ask yourself whether this is something you can comfortably live with, or whether it's going to be a constant source of irritation. If you love your girlfriend and love living with her in general then it might not be so bad to have to tidy up after her (or alternatively get used to living with a little floor clutter), but if you just can't live like that then you're only going to end up resenting her.
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Maker
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Get a cleaner
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Viva Emptiness
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You bought a house together without even living together properly first?
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Anonymous #1
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(Original post by Viva Emptiness)
You bought a house together without even living together properly first?
We been together for 6 years.
(Original post by Maker)
Get a cleaner
Not too keen on cleaners.


(Original post by tígertíger)
My boyfriend can be a little messy. He does the Bruce Almighty strip as soon as he gets in from work so I'm forever picking up his clothes, and after three years I can count the amount of times he's used the washing machine on one hand - however, we're both on the same page when it comes to cleanliness and that makes all the difference. I think you need to ask yourself whether this is something you can comfortably live with, or whether it's going to be a constant source of irritation. If you love your girlfriend and love living with her in general then it might not be so bad to have to tidy up after her (or alternatively get used to living with a little floor clutter), but if you just can't live like that then you're only going to end up resenting her.

For now I will just deal with it.
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Anonymous #2
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It sounds like you have some more issues with your girlfriend than just her cleanliness... if you are thinking of kicking her out! She sounds like a bit of nightmare, talk to her about it and sort it out.
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chantheman
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Agreed, just talk to her about it and how it makes you feel

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joker12345
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People tend not to change too much re this, they are either messy and don't mind the mess so can't be bothered to clean or tidy and hate mess. It's up to you to decide whether you can accept this and live with it. I'm messy, when I visit my boyfriend he moans/jokes that I mess up his room but tbh he pretty much cleans when it bothers him or leaves it. When he visits me he often ends up cleaning a bit too.
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