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How can I get my boyfriend into lifting? Watch

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    As the title says basically.

    My boyfriend always expresses some vague desire to start going to the gym, but every time I suggest he come along with me he declines. I'm worried he might find it a bit demasculinising if I'm there showing him what to do (obviously I'm by no means strong or an expert, I just go a lot). He seems to think he wants to lose weight first (which he insist on doing the worst way.. Through having days of eating nothing, then days of eating empty junk food) and then he says he will start at the gym.... However he has been saying this for 6 months. Also his idea of 'going to the gym' is running on the treadmill for 30 minutes.

    I hope this doesn't come across as really mean. It's genuinely that I would like to share this 'hobby' of mine with him and I think if he gave it a go he would like it.

    Any ideas how I could inspire him?
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    You can't really get him into something he isn't interested in.
    You could just say you'd really like to share this hobby with him, so he can try it once and if he doesn't like it he doesn't have to do it again.
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    I'd say it would feel demasculinising to most men to be instructed by a female, but you're in the better position to judge whether he will be particularly affected by this.

    I wanted to go to a gym but I felt embarrassed since I'm not the most masculine of people and I thought that others might make stupid jokes about it (which did happen, but it wasn't bad). The thought of being a newbie surrounded by regulars felt intimidating, too. I'm not sure whether he is affected by these issues, but it's a small possibility and might be worth bringing up.

    I'd say that you encourage him to join/go with a close male friend, and go during times where it's not so busy (late in the morning).

    Oh, and I started with the treadmill the first time I went to the gym since it seemed the safest option.
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    (Original post by WK_Of_Angmar)

    I wanted to go to a gym but I felt embarrassed since I'm not the most masculine of people and I thought that others might make stupid jokes about it (which did happen, but it wasn't bad). The thought of being a newbie surrounded by regulars felt intimidating, too. I'm not sure whether he is affected by these issues, but it's a small possibility and might be worth bringing up.
    When I first went, I was thrown into the deep end. I attended a private bodybuilding gym with people on steroids left and right (not knocking anyone who is on a cycle). People had biceps bigger than my head lmao.
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    Just get him in the door, book him with a decent personal trainer, and stay out of his way.
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    "Gym or it's over".
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    (Original post by LavenderBlueSky88)
    As the title says basically.

    My boyfriend always expresses some vague desire to start going to the gym, but every time I suggest he come along with me he declines. I'm worried he might find it a bit demasculinising if I'm there showing him what to do (obviously I'm by no means strong or an expert, I just go a lot). He seems to think he wants to lose weight first (which he insist on doing the worst way.. Through having days of eating nothing, then days of eating empty junk food) and then he says he will start at the gym.... However he has been saying this for 6 months. Also his idea of 'going to the gym' is running on the treadmill for 30 minutes.

    I hope this doesn't come across as really mean. It's genuinely that I would like to share this 'hobby' of mine with him and I think if he gave it a go he would like it.

    Any ideas how I could inspire him?

    Everyday just ask him: Do you even lift brah?
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    My take on it all is that you have to actually want to do it for it to work. Unless you want to be there and enjoy training it won't last long. That said, he may get hooked if you give him a taste. The important thing is to find out exactly what he wants from the gym so you can ensure he does the right thing. Get him on a basic program with the compound movements and educate him about what he needs to do diet wise.
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    (Original post by LavenderBlueSky88)
    As the title says basically.

    My boyfriend always expresses some vague desire to start going to the gym, but every time I suggest he come along with me he declines. I'm worried he might find it a bit demasculinising if I'm there showing him what to do (obviously I'm by no means strong or an expert, I just go a lot). He seems to think he wants to lose weight first (which he insist on doing the worst way.. Through having days of eating nothing, then days of eating empty junk food) and then he says he will start at the gym.... However he has been saying this for 6 months. Also his idea of 'going to the gym' is running on the treadmill for 30 minutes.

    I hope this doesn't come across as really mean. It's genuinely that I would like to share this 'hobby' of mine with him and I think if he gave it a go he would like it.

    Any ideas how I could inspire him?

    lol so he's a fatboy, and even if he goes gym will only run on treadmill. why did you even get with him? get someone else.

    He doesn't even have the will to do what he is proclaiming himself and not doing it after 6 months is pathetic. you seem like you will get with nearly any guy to be with this lazy scrounger.
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    (Original post by slade p)
    lol so he's a fatboy, and even if he goes gym will only run on treadmill. why did you even get with him? get someone else.

    He doesn't even have the will to do what he is proclaiming himself and not doing it after 6 months is pathetic. you seem like you will get with nearly any guy to be with this lazy scrounger.
    He's not fat he's just a bit "skinny fat". Maybe I'm just not as shallow as you? He's definitely not a scrounger, or lazy.
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    (Original post by LavenderBlueSky88)
    He's not fat he's just a bit "skinny fat". Maybe I'm just not as shallow as you? He's definitely not a scrounger, or lazy.
    tell him to get off his fat ass because he is a drag on society for being fat.
    aren't you annoyed he's been saying he will go gym for 6 months but has not?

    perhaps a guy like him is all you can get so your not bothered.
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    Maybe he's worried that he'll achieve nothing at the gym and waste the membership money. That's what I had been doing between 2010 and 2013. So I learned how to cycle this year and it's my new hobby. Not sure if it's helped me get healthier yet because I've only been doing it twice a week, and each time I spend at least four hours on the bike...

    Anyway, ask him what he genuinely wants to do to keep fit. If it's "gym" and he doesn't want to waste money then there should be an area with gym equipment at your local park e.g.
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    (Original post by LavenderBlueSky88)
    As the title says basically.

    My boyfriend always expresses some vague desire to start going to the gym, but every time I suggest he come along with me he declines. I'm worried he might find it a bit demasculinising if I'm there showing him what to do (obviously I'm by no means strong or an expert, I just go a lot). He seems to think he wants to lose weight first (which he insist on doing the worst way.. Through having days of eating nothing, then days of eating empty junk food) and then he says he will start at the gym.... However he has been saying this for 6 months. Also his idea of 'going to the gym' is running on the treadmill for 30 minutes.

    I hope this doesn't come across as really mean. It's genuinely that I would like to share this 'hobby' of mine with him and I think if he gave it a go he would like it.

    Any ideas how I could inspire him?
    That's not obvious at all, actually don't put yourself down! You're clearly looking after yourself and getting stronger and that's something to be proud of. Have you heard of Staci from the Nerd Fitness site? She's a weightlifter who can lift more than most men.

    As far as your boyfriend goes, if he really doesn't want to go, there's not much you can to do force him. You might get him there but if his heart's not in it it won't last long. Does he have a birthday coming up, or maybe your anniversary is soon, or some other excuse to give him a gift? If you bought him a session with a personal trainer to go through the basics with him, that might give him the necessary push to go for it.
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    (Original post by LavenderBlueSky88)
    As the title says basically.

    My boyfriend always expresses some vague desire to start going to the gym, but every time I suggest he come along with me he declines. I'm worried he might find it a bit demasculinising if I'm there showing him what to do (obviously I'm by no means strong or an expert, I just go a lot). He seems to think he wants to lose weight first (which he insist on doing the worst way.. Through having days of eating nothing, then days of eating empty junk food) and then he says he will start at the gym.... However he has been saying this for 6 months. Also his idea of 'going to the gym' is running on the treadmill for 30 minutes.

    I hope this doesn't come across as really mean. It's genuinely that I would like to share this 'hobby' of mine with him and I think if he gave it a go he would like it.

    Any ideas how I could inspire him?

    Hang a couple posters of male lifters on your wall. Just say ''do you even lift bro, you aint getting this booty unless you can dead tree fiddy''.
    He will buy a gym membership within 24hrs, trust me mane.
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    He simply lacks initiative like everyone else who likes the idea of getting fit and strong but isn't. If he really wanted to train, he would take the necessary steps and learning curves in his own time. If he just talks about it, without the initiative to actually want to train and learn to lift, then he's not saying it for himself.
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    Get rid of him and get a boyfriend that lifts
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    (Original post by illusionz)
    My take on it all is that you have to actually want to do it for it to work. Unless you want to be there and enjoy training it won't last long. That said, he may get hooked if you give him a taste. The important thing is to find out exactly what he wants from the gym so you can ensure he does the right thing. Get him on a basic program with the compound movements and educate him about what he needs to do diet wise.
    This sounds like the best advice.

    Whatever the answer is, it involves him getting passionate and self-motivated to gym. It's probably a long shot, but it's worth a go, and the best way to do is to work out what he'd want from the gym. If he wants to lose weight, then pretty much I think you've just got to sell lifting as the best way to do it.
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    Why gym?
    there are hundreds of sports out there from badminton, swimming, climbing to boxing. I'm sure he can find something fun to do

    Lifting isn't the be all. I began doing it to slim down, but now 2 years on find it strangely enjoyable. It depends on the person. It's not for everyone. If you like it, good for you but he doesn't seem to be interested. Move on to something else.
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    (Original post by LavenderBlueSky88)
    As the title says basically.

    My boyfriend always expresses some vague desire to start going to the gym, but every time I suggest he come along with me he declines. I'm worried he might find it a bit demasculinising if I'm there showing him what to do (obviously I'm by no means strong or an expert, I just go a lot). He seems to think he wants to lose weight first (which he insist on doing the worst way.. Through having days of eating nothing, then days of eating empty junk food) and then he says he will start at the gym.... However he has been saying this for 6 months. Also his idea of 'going to the gym' is running on the treadmill for 30 minutes.

    I hope this doesn't come across as really mean. It's genuinely that I would like to share this 'hobby' of mine with him and I think if he gave it a go he would like it.

    Any ideas how I could inspire him?
    you can't

    it needs to be his idea.

    if its your idea to get him to the gym, you become his mother.

    men doing what their girlfriends suggest is never a good thing. men don't respect the guy, women don't, his own women doesn't and he himself won't either.
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    Lead him to 4chan.org/fit and have him start a thread on why he doesn't want to lift. They'll put him straight in a matter of minutes.
 
 
 
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