The Student Room Group

I think I was molested...

This was when I was only around 11 years old, and it was by a 16 year old. Thing is, I can only remember being picked up by him, either by the chest, round my chest from behind, or between the legs. He would often pick me up and put me on top of the lockers, and I can remember him staring at me... but then, even a few days after it happened, I can't remember a thing of what happened for about half an hour. It is just really odd to think about now, because it happened quite often and I was just a scared little Year 7 girl. Now I can't stand anyone being behind me, but I just have no idea what happened. Even when rereading my old diaries, it recalls being picked up by him, but even when only written a day or so after the events, it states that i couldn't remember what happened.

I just have no idea what happened, and that gets to me even more than recalling his face just staring at me. It was always me, and it was most mornings since I used to have to arrive at school early (8.05). What can I do to forget about it, or remember what actually happened?

Thank you :smile:

Reply 1

It sounds like you've repressed most of the memories from that day. Have you tried seeing anyone about this or is this the first time you've told anyone?

Reply 2

I would suggest counsilling. Your post definitely makes out you need something of that sort.

Do you remember where it was taking place? School? Where abouts? It couldn't have been a public place I imagine.

Reply 3

Yeh..when your young and something awful happens to you, very often your so traumatised you blank it out your memory and you genuinally cannot remember what happened. A bit of a scary thought tbh..if I were you I'd go and see a counsellor to just let it out, so you can try and move on.

Reply 4

I've told some close friends, but they were just like, 'OMG, that's quite scary!' And then the subject was abruptly changed...

It wasn't just one day, it was I think most weekdays for about a month, maybe more, maybe less.

I might just have forgotten the events though, and that's why I'm not sure; I cannot be sure whether I have repressed my memories, or simply forgotten. Granted, it is difficult to forget events of a day ago (as in my diary) but I might have done...

Reply 5

Hypnosis. :cool:

Reply 6

It was in school, in the corridor by my classroom. Since I arrived early, I had to unlock all the doors, and then would end up waiting by the door for around half an hour. The Year 11 arrived early because his dad was my history teacher, but his classroom and form room was downstairs.

Reply 7

It's unlikely that you've forgotten the events completely. It's likely that they have been repressed. There's lots of sites about repression if you wanted to read more about it.

Reply 8

Ok, I may well do that :smile:

Just not going to go to the Sister in the San at school... she reports everything to your parents, regardless of whether she said she wouldn'r or not... and if you confront her, she swears that she never said she wouldn't tell in the first place. :rolleyes:

Thank you everyone for your opinions and your reassurance! I will still lurk around this thread for a while though :smile:

Reply 9

Anonymous
Ok, I may well do that :smile:

Just not going to go to the Sister in the San at school... she reports everything to your parents, regardless of whether she said she wouldn'r or not... and if you confront her, she swears that she never said she wouldn't tell in the first place. :rolleyes:

Thank you everyone for your opinions and your reassurance! I will still lurk around this thread for a while though :smile:


Maybe try your GP? They could perhaps refer you on to someone that could help. They did for me when I was struggling with certain things in my life :smile:

Reply 10

Although it must be quite wierd for you to have these feeling you have to ask yourself a very important question:

Do you actually want to remember what happened?

Do you think you would become depressed and would it change who are as a person if you found out you were actually molested?

Reply 11

Anonymous
This was when I was only around 11 years old, and it was by a 16 year old. Thing is, I can only remember being picked up by him, either by the chest, round my chest from behind, or between the legs. He would often pick me up and put me on top of the lockers, and I can remember him staring at me...


sounds like he's the one who needs help...:eek:
It must be extremely antagonising to picture him but not define what actually happenned. But as mentioned in previous posts, are you sure you want to remember this? All the best

Reply 12

Well I doubt that would be something you would just forget. To simply forget something that means it was unremarkable and not important. That really doesn't sound like the case here.

Reply 13

I guess if it was something really bad you'd be having bad flashbacks about it.

Reply 14

At the moment I can't stand anyone walking or going anywhere near my back... them being behind me seriously freaks me out, and whenever he used to pick me up, it was always by surprise from behind.

I don't know if I want to remember either :p: Probably not, because obviously it wouldn't be nice to know, but then again it would be a sort of closure I guess...