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I don't want my boyfriend to lose weight :( Watch

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    Hey, we're both the same age (21). My boyfriend has always been a bit overweight, like about 2-3 stone? He's quite a big guy though, he's got muscle too, and he keeps fit by jogging, cycling and some rugby. He just likes his grub!

    He's really good looking and he's really sweet, kind and funny. I know it's his body, he can do what he wants with it. It's just if he loses any weight, he should do it for himself. I heard him say to someone he was going to do it for me. I don't want him to change for someone else. I'm slim, but I love him how he is. He's like the cuddly/teddy bear sort haha and I love it. He's nice to cuddle up to!

    How can I say to him I like him how he is? Shall I just say what I've said above? I went out with someone before him. He had a 6 pack, he was good looking but he was full of himself. Every mirror we walked past, he'd keep looking at himself and doing his hair. We lasted 2 weeks. I don't even like 6 packs. I don't want my boyfriend to become like that. x
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    He won't lose weight if he works towards a six-pack. (Muscle weighs about the same as fat)
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    If losing weight will putting him in a better position health-wise (you say he's overweight), why would you not want that for him? I'm sure cuddling with him when he's at a healthier weight will still be satisfying. If not, well, perhaps you should examine what that says about you.
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    (Original post by shawn_o1)
    He won't lose weight if he works towards a six-pack. (Muscle weighs about the same as fat)
    Actually, muscle weighs more than fat because it's more dense...
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    ^ If it's more dense then it takes up less space in the body so he'll appear to have lost weight when he may have gained some. Is that what OP is worried about?
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    (Original post by shawn_o1)
    He won't lose weight if he works towards a six-pack. (Muscle weighs about the same as fat)
    (Original post by Delciate)
    If losing weight will putting him in a better position health-wise (you say he's overweight), why would you not want that for him? I'm sure cuddling with him when he's at a healthier weight will still be satisfying. If not, well, perhaps you should examine what that says about you.
    (Original post by Scienceisgood)
    Actually, muscle weighs more than fat because it's more dense...
    (Original post by shawn_o1)
    ^ If it's more dense then it takes up less space in the body so he'll appear to have lost weight when he may have gained some. Is that what OP is worried about?
    Basically, I mean he's got a bit of belly and I like it. It's just he's soft and really nice to cuddle! I don't really mean weight then... just I don't want him to get rid of his chubby bits. He's a fit guy, he eats well, it's just he eats a lot. Right through school he's always been chubbier.
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    (Original post by natasherrrrr93)
    Basically, I mean he's got a bit of belly and I like it. It's just he's soft and really nice to cuddle! I don't really mean weight then... just I don't want him to get rid of his chubby bits. He's a fit guy, he eats well, it's just he eats a lot. Right through school he's always been chubbier.
    Maybe you do the cooking for both of you?
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    Would you not be happier that he's getting healthier? Having all that fat might be soft and cuddly, but it's not great for his health.
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    (Original post by Scienceisgood)
    Maybe you do the cooking for both of you?
    I do! Even though he eats a lot, it's a balanced/healthy diet. He just eats a lot of everything
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    Can I ask, how tall is he and how much does he weigh?
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    (Original post by shiggydiggy)
    Would you not be happier that he's getting healthier? Having all that fat might be soft and cuddly, but it's not great for his health.
    I mean like he's healthy now. He's not just sat playing on an Xbox, eating cake, breathing heavily. Also someone of that 2-3 stone is muscle so i'm not sure how much of it would be fat. His waist is about 36 inches. He's not obese. If he was doing the Xbox and breathing funny, yes, I would be concerned. But he's fitter than me and I love his chubbiness!
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    Just say what you've basically said in your post: "I'll be supportive if you want to lose weight (and you really have to be) but don't do it for me because I like you just the way you are!".
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    (Original post by Scienceisgood)
    Can I ask, how tall is he and how much does he weigh?
    he's 6'1", around 15 stone I think, and a 36 inch waist.
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    Ell it's his body, he wants to do it and in the long term it's a lot better for his health. You shouldn't stop him to be honest.
    He'll still be cuddly.
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    (Original post by natasherrrrr93)
    he's 6'1", around 15 stone I think, and a 36 inch waist.
    That seems a little overweight to me and I can see why he would want to lose a little.
    I am 5'7, 10.5 stone and have a 30/31 inch waist...

    Talk to him about it but, it may just be one of those things you'll have to accept about it that, if he wants to lose weight, he will.
    Sorry but, just imagining what he looks like, I can KIND OF imagine why he wants to lose weight, I gained half a stone when at home after finishing uni this year and and now working my way to losing it again...
    Maybe you can meet somewhere in the middle?
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    (Original post by Scienceisgood)
    That seems a little overweight to me and I can see why he would want to lose a little.
    I am 5'7, 10.5 stone and have a 30/31 inch waist...

    Talk to him about it but, it may just be one of those things you'll have to accept about it that, if he wants to lose weight, he will.
    Sorry but, just imagining what he looks like, I can KIND OF imagine why he wants to lose weight, I gained half a stone when at home after finishing uni this year and and now working my way to losing it again...
    Maybe you can meet somewhere in the middle?
    Ok. If he's wearing a t-shirt and a coat/jacket, he looks slim. 15 stone sounds like a lot, but he's got a big broad build. In a t-shirt you can see a bit more of a belly shape but it's not fat.

    I won't stop him then. But it's just I like him the way he is.
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    its not healthy to be obese
    ok?
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    (Original post by natasherrrrr93)
    Hey, we're both the same age (21) and we've been together for 6 years. My boyfriend has always been a bit overweight, like about 2-3 stone? He's quite a big guy though, he's got muscle too, and he keeps fit by jogging, cycling and some rugby. He just likes his grub!

    He's really good looking and he's really sweet, kind and funny. I know it's his body, he can do what he wants with it. It's just if he loses any weight, he should do it for himself. I heard him say to someone he was going to do it for me. I don't want him to change for someone else. I'm slim, but I love him how he is. He's like the cuddly/teddy bear sort haha and I love it. He's nice to cuddle up to!

    How can I say to him I like him how he is? Shall I just say what I've said above? I went out with someone before him. He had a 6 pack, he was good looking but he was full of himself. Every mirror we walked past, he'd keep looking at himself and doing his hair. We lasted 2 weeks. I don't even like 6 packs. I don't want my boyfriend to become like that. x

    From my perspective, losing the weight can only do him good. It'll reduce his risk of various heart (and other) diseases, his self-esteem will rise and the extra exercise will mean that he'd be less likely to become over-stressed or depressed. So as far as I'm concerned, even if he's losing the weight for you, it can only be a good thing.

    Plus having a 6 pack wasn't what made your previous boyfriend full of himself. He was already narcissistic/ vain, and the 6 pack was just another outlet for that. Getting a 6 pack won't change your boyfriend's personality.
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    (Original post by natasherrrrr93)
    he's 6'1", around 15 stone I think, and a 36 inch waist.
    Yeah that's overweight. You might say he is healthy but ultimately he is carrying too much weight.

    In my experience, girlfriends always want to hold their boyfriends back from improving themselves. It usually stems from some deep seated fear that they will become out of their league and dump them.
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    (Original post by shiggydiggy)
    Yeah that's overweight. You might say he is healthy but ultimately he is carrying too much weight.
    Ultimately, some is muscle too! It's not all fat.
 
 
 
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