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Want her to be my gf, but she lives so far away watch

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    #1

    Anon as she could be on here.

    I met this girl when I was at uni, although we were never that close. Now that I have left, I seem to chat to her even more. We go through phases where we don't talk, then have a huge conversation on the phone. Then maybe send a few Snapchats, then go back to the beginning. It's like both people are trying to play a game where they don't want to come across as too needy.

    Because of this, I'm finding it hard to escalate anything. I can't pick up any hints or indicators that she's interested through these, because we just stop for ages so we win and aren't the one who gets ignored. One example of this was when we spoke on the phone the other night. The next day we texted a bit but she was out so she said she will text me when she gets home, and then I told her I was going out so I would speak to her the next day. I text her (not drunk text) later that night, but I didn't get a single reply. Then the day later, I get a random Snapchat from her.

    But annoyingly, this is close the perfect game a girl can play on me and I am beginning to like her more and more. My city is 5 hours drive from hers and so I tried to invite her here a few times but she's not come....and I don't want to travel there incase there is nothing and I've misread absolutely everything.

    What can I do?

    How do I go about trying to get her when she lives so far away?
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    You probably wont want to hear this but I think she's just using you out of boredom. if she liked you she would make the effort, if she's not then it doesn't seem like she does. You never had a relationship with this girl when you were at uni together and for all you know she could be texting lots of different lads. If two people like each other it shouldn't be this hard. id walk away before you fall too deep.
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    (Original post by DanielleRia)
    You probably wont want to hear this but I think she's just using you out of boredom. if she liked you she would make the effort, if she's not then it doesn't seem like she does. You never had a relationship with this girl when you were at uni together and for all you know she could be texting lots of different lads. If two people like each other it shouldn't be this hard. id walk away before you fall too deep.
    Seconded

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    Disagree with the above posters, just because you never had anything at uni doesn't mean that you can't now, things change and people can get closer.
    Sounds like she's just playing the same game you are, difficult to know how she feels, take the chance and tell her.
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    (Original post by joker12345)
    Disagree with the above posters, just because you never had anything at uni doesn't mean that you can't now, things change and people can get closer.
    Sounds like she's just playing the same game you are, difficult to know how she feels, take the chance and tell her.
    Tell her? That doesn't seem clever to me. What if she has no feelings for me. Then everything will just be awkward.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by DanielleRia)
    You probably wont want to hear this but I think she's just using you out of boredom. if she liked you she would make the effort, if she's not then it doesn't seem like she does. You never had a relationship with this girl when you were at uni together and for all you know she could be texting lots of different lads. If two people like each other it shouldn't be this hard. id walk away before you fall too deep.
    Annoyingly, I think you're right. I think I want her to feel more thats why I get extra excited when she speaks, but maybe in reality this is the truth
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Tell her? That doesn't seem clever to me. What if she has no feelings for me. Then everything will just be awkward.
    Do you think you'd really miss her friendship so wouldn't want to risk it?
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    Crank it up a notch and flirt? Are your conversations friendly or more than that? Pay her complements and get her to understand your intentions, then see if she responds.
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    When you want something you over romatizise it in your head, and it makes you think that possibly there could be more, I wouldn't suggest telling her unless you are sure she feels the same, she could lead you on then so she doesn't loose you as a friend but never intend to be anymore. Either continue you the friendship and understand that there's a chance it may not ever happen or stop talking to her all together. It's **** but you can carry on wondering what if
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Tell her? That doesn't seem clever to me. What if she has no feelings for me. Then everything will just be awkward.
    Aww but if you enjoy her company then youd better hurry before you miss your chance
    tell her how you feel and ask for an honest response
    That's what I think anyways (:
    • #2
    #2

    Ditch this. Bail out. Forget about it and move on. Let me explain why.

    She's obviously not serious about this. She doesn't want a relationship. If she were taking it seriously, she would make her feelings known. But she's just messing around, she's not worth the hassle.

    She's too far away. It will not work.

    Get out before you it's too late. It may hurt for a while, but you'll get over her eventually. Find someone else, or find something to do to distract yourself.
 
 
 
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