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what can i do?

hey

basically, i've been feeling really down this past week, and it's caused me to lose weight, not want to eat, constantly feel like crying, i can't sleep properly.

it's cos of loads of things, i feel i have no friends at home or at uni, my bf, now my ex, has gone abroad for the year, and we split because of it. evyerthing just seems hopeless and i don't know where to start to fix my life. i don't really want advice on how to, because i spose i do know, and i've tried, but i honestly don't know why it's not working.

anwyay, what i really want to know is, my mum's booked an appt for the dr on monday, cos she thinks i'm losing weight because of a thyroid problem (which i know it's not, but she wants to check it anyway). i thought maybe i could tell the dr i'm feeling really bad. but i don't want her to refer me to counselling, cos it doesn't work, i don't think i'm strong enough, cos they expect u to find your own way out (i had counselling for a month) and i ended up feeling even worse. what else can she do for me?

(i know i can just wait until monday to see, but i really just want to know now).

thanks for any useful advice ppl can give

xxxx

Reply 1

WokSz

Firstly, a doctor is the best person you can talk to as they are both medically trained, and normally good listeners. I would suggest telling the Doctor everything you feel, but make sure you explain to him/her that you don't want counselling.
Secondly, you don't need to bring yourself down by saying that you have no friends. The only way to get friends is to go out and become sociable. Maybe join some local societies at University? You could also take up Sports? Have you even started University?

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

Hmm... why not make some friends?

You're suffering from some form of depression and its best that you get some professional help. But if you don't fancy that, you gotta look yourself into what's wrong.

Probably your breaking up with your boy friend triggered a bigger problem that you've been having, that you think you don't have friends. Why is that? Are you shy? Haven't you been able to like anyone you met to create a normal friendship? Do you have insecurities over your appearance?

It's only after knowing all these things (and other relevant stuff) that someone can actually recommend you what to do. I'm afraid it's hard for anyone to solve your problem over the internet without all these details.

Reply 3

janesmith

there must be one person whose company you enjoyed. call them or a cousin and do something fun. get a hobby or volunteer. you will have to do something to distract you and lift your feelings. by making new friends that will give u a good starting ground again. uni is in a few weeks u cud try getting to know your flatmates or join a society. ur gonna have to be active now. it doesnt help that your dealing with splitting with ur bf. it seems that he could have been ur support, u didnt need anyone else as u had him to lean on and be a lover, friend and advisor etc. just be optimistic. you can turn this all around. confide in someone or write a list of goals you want to achieve by jan on a piece of paper. that will focus u and it will all happen.

Reply 4

Anonymous #2

To add to my previous post. I wasn't sure if I wanted to post from my personal life, but I think you could do with it..

A very close friend of mine of 2 years was suffering from something like this before I met her. She was in a same society as me and appeared quite normal on the outside, but after weeks of long evenings planning some stuff I could sense an emptiness in her.

Later, when we were in a relationship she said how she was suffering from much of what you are. And after months of depression, an old sec school teacher whom she met in a cafe gave her some great advise. She started volunteering at all sorts of places, like helping nature and animals and church camps and that sort of uplifted her spirits somewhat. Then she took piano lessons, learnt guitar and violin and some other stuff I cant recall. At least, she could face the world cheerfully, though she still didn't have any real friends until I came along. When I first saw her, she would be very cheerful all the time, laughing and making jokes, but at times I'd see her sitting in absolute silence with a heavy expression. And I kinda liked her, so we became great friends. Now, we're not dating but she's still one of my dearest friends.

Just to show that a great friend is waiting for everyone. And that you can do many things to make yourself feel better, till you find a friend.