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Friend stressing me out!

Not really sure what I want people to say to this, i'm just ranting really.

Basically, my friend is really starting to stress me out, and has been doing for a while now. This isn't to say I love her to bits, but shes very loud and confident, and wants everything done her way or no way at all, and goes in a mood if she doesn't get her own way, or people disagree with her.

We went on holiday together this summer, as everyone else in our group of friends was either away, or busy. We had a great time, but on two seperate days, she completely ignored me, and fell out with me over something really stupid. The first time was after she just expected me to carry this bottle of water all the way from our apartment, to the beach. I wouldn't have minded, but I had my own bottle of water, and literally everything she couldn't fit in her bag, and it took the piss a bit because it was quite a walk. I asked her why she wouldn't carry it and her response was something along the lines of; "it's to share", so that automatically meant she didn't take responsibility of it. All day she practically ignored me, and as it was only us two, we couldn't leave each other and do our own thing. This 'ignoring thing' happened on another day because I didn't wake up to her alarm and it was about 11oclock by the time we got to the beach, so she was mad at me, even though she had made no attempt to wake me up (and i'm a heavy sleeper). We spent the day in silence and it was just boring, and unnecessary.

Anyway, after the holiday we were fine, but didn't see each other for a while just so we could have some space from one another, but I had a free house so invited people round. It was just me, my friend and another friend in the end and I put a DVD on and because she didn't want to watch it *even though me and my other friend did*, she just sat there with a face like thunder until we changed it. It's starting to get really annoying seeing as shes 20, and should learn that she can't always get her own way, and needs to compromise.

For my birthday she got me some pyjamas *amongst other things*, but the bottoms didn't fit as they were tiny, and didn't stretch, so I told her so she could get me a bigger size, which she said she would. She's looked in the shop *as she got them from where she works*, and another shop, but no where has them. I asked her online earlier if she'd managed to find any, as i'm going back to uni in less than a week and she said "Did you not look in the Manchester store to see if they had any?", as I was up there last week, which I thought was pretty cheeky, seeing as it was her present to me. If she'd have asked me to look before I went up I wouldn't have minded at all, but just that she assumed I would have done. Agh, shes stressing me out so much!

Sorry for the length, and i'm not expecting anything, but just needed to rant :smile:

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Reply 20

littlemissalex

Hey, i know how you feel. My 'best' friend and i were completely inseparable; we'd be together all day long (she's a year older than me and going onto her 2nd yr of uni, where as im starting this year) and so we were together at school and afterwards (also neighbours coincidentally!). But ive realised that she used to take me for granted; telling me to rush to her house quickly and calling me if i got there in 3mins rather than 1min - and she would NEVER arrive punctually to my house, or when we had to go out pick me up on time.. Little things like that got to me, and since she's gone to uni, we've lost touch a lot (due to various other reasons.. V V complicated) but because ive realised that ive had enough of being the little follower; doing whatever she wanted, never being able to have a say in anything and being taken for granted.. Now, almost a year on, we've lost touch because ive realised how different we are; she's changed since uni and ive woken up. Even though when she comes back, we've met up and all, were not at all as close as before..

So what i would suggest you doing is seriously thinking about the future of your friendship; sounds to me she is also taking you for granted and if she gets into her (what seems to be) selfish strops, then ignore her and do what you want to do. If you continually give in to her, she is treading all over you, and in the end, you're going to end up hating her rather than loving her as a friend. Or if you feel like you need to get it off your chest with her, speak to her and tell her you've had enough of her behaviour towards you.. Might make her see that you're too important to lose as a result of her disrespectuful behaviour..

Although must admit, i had a friend over for the summer for a week and by the end of it i got a bit tired of her: its different being with your friend for a long time because you might think you know them 100% but living with them is different. If she's like this all the time though, then confront her?

Anyhow, hope it works out well, xxx

Reply 21

littlemissalex

polythenegirl

that sounds very like a friend of mine, espcially when u were talking about the water carrying. My friend done the same thing with alcohol, she made me carry it around this park because she didnt want to be caught with it. So she expected I did? grrrr And everytime we're out places she makes me go and order for her but of course when I ask 'why the heck can't u do it urself, I've already been up?' she says 'just.' it all accumulated basically and I haven't hung out with her 'properly' in quite a while. So my advice= cut ur stick :smile:

I know the EXACT feeling! God it pissed me off sooo much! :frown:

Plain selfish in my opinion and bloody rude! Argh im worked up now! :mad:

Reply 22

Kittennffc

It isn't just me that this is towards, its everyone, even her parents. I think it's just the way she is. I mean we don't see that much of each other because i'm at uni in Manchester, her at uni in Nottingham, and its great when we see each other, but as we've both been off all summer, we've seen a lot more of each other than usual.

Reply 23

polythenegirl

alexandra

I know the EXACT feeling! God it pissed me off sooo much! :frown:

Plain selfish in my opinion and bloody rude! Argh im worked up now! :mad:

lol me too! I'm just rememberin more things I'd forgotten about now. grrrrrrr *grits teeth*

Reply 24

littlemissalex

polythenegirl

lol me too! I'm just rememberin more things I'd forgotten about now. grrrrrrr *grits teeth*

hehe

Same here! To be honest, im glad were not close anymore because i cant take it anymore; all the not being able to trust her and being used like crap all the time.. argh! We could've had a mega confrontation had he not been at uni because something huge happened which i wanted an explanation for (its embarrassing on her behalf and dont really want to say it here, so just bare with me lol!) but never got, so im glad we just drifted apart.. :rolleyes:

Reply 25

TrentEnd

You girls make it all so complicated! Lads, although they never admit it, love their mates and don't have any of this!

(or is it just me? maybe I'm the one they all bitch about....)

Reply 26

polythenegirl

TrentEnd

You girls make it all so complicated! Lads, although they never admit it, love their mates and don't have any of this!

(or is it just me? maybe I'm the one they all bitch about....)

aye, buts thats cus yous have the balls to tell them they're ***** to their faces....I admit that I don't and would fear the consequences so would rather bite my lip, and as it happens, let my aggression towards them pour out when I'm drunk. Or maybe u just have perfect friends and don't have any 'issues'?

Reply 27

TrentEnd

polythenegirl

Or maybe u just have perfect friends and don't have any 'issues'?

hehe if only!

Reply 28

littlemissalex

TrentEnd

You girls make it all so complicated! Lads, although they never admit it, love their mates and don't have any of this!

(or is it just me? maybe I'm the one they all bitch about....)

No you're right i think, guys are more straightforward cause they're better at confronting their friend if they have something disturbing them *of course here im speaking generally, im sure there are guys who dont confront their friends!* Lol, im sure they dont bitch about you :p:

... well maybe? :rolleyes:

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