Do women have a much harder future than men?

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inthedark1
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Ok so today I've been thinking something which might make people angry but I guess I just have to point it out how I feel etc. I'm 29, female and know a man in his 50's he never married just lives for himself, goes on dates with women and keeps himself fit so he is attractive and all. I would like to be like him when I'm older (even though I'm female) I would like to stay healthy, fit and attractive (I am going to keep fit with weights/cardio all my life), just live for myself and maybe go on a few dates with men. Despite my age I have never really been on dates I've always been a tomboy who cared more about the gym than guys. I can get attracted but I've been more of a loner. Guys my age have never been interested in me so I've just got on with things. I suppose I would like to change a little and make more of an effort.

The problem is from what I've read online (and to some extent in real life) women don't really have a bright future unless they are married lol. Most men of all ages apparently are not interested in older women (past 35/40) as they are attracted to youth. I just feel trapped by this in that my life after 30 will be a waste (I don't want kids and I'm not career focused). So even if I work hard to keep a nice fit body I will get ignored
There's also the stigma.. if I wanted to date younger men I would be thought of as a cougar whereas for men getting a young woman is often seen as an achievement. So I couldnt really have the life of this 50 year old man as wouldn't it be different with me being female? I wouldn't be seen as an attractive charmer like him who does what she wants I would be seen as odd. Just wanted some thoughts on my perception of this am I right or am I not being realistic?

I can't help but think that a 50 year old single man with no kids isn't thought of in the same way a 50 year old single woman with no kids would be. Not saying this is anyone's fault it's just what I've gathered. Just wanted honest opinions. Im aware this thread gives an ideal opportunity for (who have had bad times with women!) to put women down (certainly not my intention) so just try and forget all the gender V gender malarkey and answer in an objective way.


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Anonymous #1
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Ok, this is relevant to me and my taste in women. personally I'd find it quite unconventional, as I am, and maybe sexy. Because I fancy certain older women a lot more, their experience, bodies, it all. And I agree about double standards, I'd love to date an older woman I admired and fancied. But obviously it's much better if they don't have a child. As per having kids, thats the biological reality, men don't have the same biological clock, that's just as it is.
I think the thik about not fancying a woman past 35 is the same as society not approving ethnic women, or only approving one kind of beauty, it's a kind of asexual weird cultural pressure of what it is socially acceptable to find attractive. But in reality tons of people fancy older women. And it's like some people treat it as unsavoury, but fancying younger is far more unsavoury, I love a strong, intelligent mature woman. I would basically find the confidence to do your own thing, not go with convention it age gaps etc and be childfree sexy. I like the way you challenge the double standard and suggest wanting to date a younger man, it's refreshing and not boring and conservative. And, if you too a forthright approach to it with some guy you were attracted to, to me, I'd find the non-conformity and confidence of it very sexy. I'd quite like to talk some more actually.
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Oh, just realised you're actually not 'older' yet, you're only 29.
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Chicken.M.
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ye it's probably slightly easier for old men to get dates than old women. Thats only if they're good looking though or they have money.

Most people would see them as creepy though. Women don't get the same stigma of creepiness attached to them tbh.
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black_mamba
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(Original post by inthedark1)
[FONT=Verdana]I just feel trapped by this in that my life after 30 will be a waste (I don't want kids and I'm not career focused). So even if I work hard to keep a nice fit body I will get ignored
There's also the stigma.. if I wanted to date younger men I would be thought of as a cougar whereas for men getting a young woman is often seen as an achievement. So I couldnt really have the life of this 50 year old man as wouldn't it be different with me being female? I wouldn't be seen as an attractive charmer like him who does what she wants I would be seen as odd. Just wanted some thoughts on my perception of this am I right or am I not being realistic?
There is stigma with everything, unfortunately. Whether you marry early, stay unmarried, have kids or don't have kids, you can't ever please everyone all of the time, so why bother?

As with all stereotypes there is some truth to them and some exceptions. You can be one of the exceptions, and if people don't see you that way, then they clearly weren't right for you in the first place.

You are right though there is stigma from certain people, but luckily there are enough exceptional people out there who are open minded and mature enough to see past that (believe me, maybe you just haven't met enough of them!). It seems as if we're constantly told that men prefer youth and women prefer maturity, which might be true for some folk, but like I say there are exceptions. I know a few women who are like what you may become when you're older and I think they're awesome people, and they're not exactly short of male attention. I guess the trick is to feel confident about it and not ashamed simply because it's slightly different.
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SnoochToTheBooch
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(Original post by inthedark1)
Ok so today I've been thinking something which might make people angry but I guess I just have to point it out how I feel etc. I'm 29, female and know a man in his 50's he never married just lives for himself, goes on dates with women and keeps himself fit so he is attractive and all. I would like to be like him when I'm older (even though I'm female) I would like to stay healthy, fit and attractive (I am going to keep fit with weights/cardio all my life), just live for myself and maybe go on a few dates with men. Despite my age I have never really been on dates I've always been a tomboy who cared more about the gym than guys. I can get attracted but I've been more of a loner. Guys my age have never been interested in me so I've just got on with things. I suppose I would like to change a little and make more of an effort.

The problem is from what I've read online (and to some extent in real life) women don't really have a bright future unless they are married lol. Most men of all ages apparently are not interested in older women (past 35/40) as they are attracted to youth. I just feel trapped by this in that my life after 30 will be a waste (I don't want kids and I'm not career focused). So even if I work hard to keep a nice fit body I will get ignored
There's also the stigma.. if I wanted to date younger men I would be thought of as a cougar whereas for men getting a young woman is often seen as an achievement. So I couldnt really have the life of this 50 year old man as wouldn't it be different with me being female? I wouldn't be seen as an attractive charmer like him who does what she wants I would be seen as odd. Just wanted some thoughts on my perception of this am I right or am I not being realistic?

I can't help but think that a 50 year old single man with no kids isn't thought of in the same way a 50 year old single woman with no kids would be. Not saying this is anyone's fault it's just what I've gathered. Just wanted honest opinions. Im aware this thread gives an ideal opportunity for (who have had bad times with women!) to put women down (certainly not my intention) so just try and forget all the gender V gender malarkey and answer in an objective way.


Plenty of men out there that find the idea of marriage completely stupid (such as myself) and I'll bet the numbers are growing. Do as you please and *******s to how you're 'thought of', you'll be happier for it.
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iEatMuFFiNS
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(Original post by inthedark1)
Ok so today I've been thinking something which might make people angry but I guess I just have to point it out how I feel etc. I'm 29, female and know a man in his 50's he never married just lives for himself, goes on dates with women and keeps himself fit so he is attractive and all. I would like to be like him when I'm older (even though I'm female) I would like to stay healthy, fit and attractive (I am going to keep fit with weights/cardio all my life), just live for myself and maybe go on a few dates with men. Despite my age I have never really been on dates I've always been a tomboy who cared more about the gym than guys. I can get attracted but I've been more of a loner. Guys my age have never been interested in me so I've just got on with things. I suppose I would like to change a little and make more of an effort.

The problem is from what I've read online (and to some extent in real life) women don't really have a bright future unless they are married lol. Most men of all ages apparently are not interested in older women (past 35/40) as they are attracted to youth. I just feel trapped by this in that my life after 30 will be a waste (I don't want kids and I'm not career focused). So even if I work hard to keep a nice fit body I will get ignored
There's also the stigma.. if I wanted to date younger men I would be thought of as a cougar whereas for men getting a young woman is often seen as an achievement. So I couldnt really have the life of this 50 year old man as wouldn't it be different with me being female? I wouldn't be seen as an attractive charmer like him who does what she wants I would be seen as odd. Just wanted some thoughts on my perception of this am I right or am I not being realistic?

I can't help but think that a 50 year old single man with no kids isn't thought of in the same way a 50 year old single woman with no kids would be. Not saying this is anyone's fault it's just what I've gathered. Just wanted honest opinions. Im aware this thread gives an ideal opportunity for (who have had bad times with women!) to put women down (certainly not my intention) so just try and forget all the gender V gender malarkey and answer in an objective way.


Are you ****ing kidding me? it's so much easier for a woman of pretty much any age/bodytype/race/looks to go out and get laid or get a man for date/whatever than it is for men... women play the dating game on easy mode..
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inthedark1
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(Original post by iEatMuFFiNS)
Are you ****ing kidding me? it's so much easier for a woman of pretty much any age/bodytype/race/looks to go out and get laid or get a man for date/whatever than it is for men... women play the dating game on easy mode..
Young women have it easy I agree but I'm talking about older women. Had a look online it seems to be well known that men base attractiveness on looks/youth and older men often don't find older women physically attractive nor women their age. Studies done from dating sites etc, don't know how well they reflect reality lol but it's daunting.
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iEatMuFFiNS
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(Original post by inthedark1)
Young women have it easy I agree but I'm talking about older women. Had a look online it seems to be well known that men base attractiveness on looks/youth and older men often don't find older women physically attractive nor women their age. Studies done from dating sites etc, don't know how well they reflect reality lol but it's daunting.
You've got droves of older women who go out every fri/sat night to bars and clubs and they are always getting hit on and picked up still...

I don't know what your basing your proposition on, but it just sounds more like an insecurity about becoming some kind of cat lady or something...

Also, i bet the inbox's of some older women on those sites are full from blokes trying to bang them, whereas the guys inbox's will be empty unless they are getting a reply most of the time.
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inthedark1
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(Original post by iEatMuFFiNS)
You've got droves of older women who go out every fri/sat night to bars and clubs and they are always getting hit on and picked up still...

I don't know what your basing your proposition on, but it just sounds more like an insecurity about becoming some kind of cat lady or something...

Also, i bet the inbox's of some older women on those sites are full from blokes trying to bang them, whereas the guys inbox's will be empty unless they are getting a reply most of the time.
I don't go to clubs only occasionally so don't know what goes on there but I'd imagine these women are not that old and have big breasts that only really attract a ons I'm making assumptions as I don't know but I'm sure you will correct me.

I suppose I am a little worried about becoming a cat lady, although rather than cats I keep rats as pets so I'd be taking it a step further :K:.
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iEatMuFFiNS
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(Original post by inthedark1)
I don't go to clubs only occasionally so don't know what goes on there but I'd imagine these women are not that old and have big breasts that only really attract a ons I'm making assumptions as I don't know but I'm sure you will correct me.

I suppose I am a little worried about becoming a cat lady, although rather than cats I keep rats as pets so I'd be taking it a step further :K:.
No lol. They are either old women with a ton of warpaint designed to hide their age. Fatties which ok do have big tits, but are still fat. Fuglys which still get attention because they have a vagina of sorts...
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Women have this wonderful thing called "menopause". As soon as you hit that, say goodbye to your lovely body. I don't think even working out will save you there.

And if you choose to remain single, be prepared for alot of "Oh, are you sure?" "Oh no, what happened!" "Are you absolutely sure that you don't want to have children?" Along with all the deep rooted sexist attitudes in society, meaning that in whatever given task you want to achieve by yourself, you won't be given the same amount of respect as a man would.

Isn't it a joy to be born a female.
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Huskaris
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(Original post by Another)
Women have this wonderful thing called "menopause". As soon as you hit that, say goodbye to your lovely body. I don't think even working out will save you there.

And if you choose to remain single, be prepared for alot of "Oh, are you sure?" "Oh no, what happened!" "Are you absolutely sure that you don't want to have children?" Along with all the deep rooted sexist attitudes in society, meaning that in whatever given task you want to achieve by yourself, you won't be given the same amount of respect as a man would.

Isn't it a joy to be born a female.
10/10 will read and lol again
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datpiff
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Being a woman is amazing when you're under 25. Being a woman slowly starts to suck once you get past 25. Some women when they turn 18 think they have it made and think they'll have the same sexual power they have in 15 years time. They realise that isn't the case when a new bunch of pretty young things hit the scene.

So much pressure. Pressure to have kids, pressure to look good, menopause, periods, sexism in society, being restricted to certain industries...


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Inazuma
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Short answer: no.
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cynthiaiso
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(Original post by datpiff)
Being a woman is amazing when you're under 25. Being a woman slowly starts to suck once you get past 25. Some women when they turn 18 think they have it made and think they'll have the same sexual power they have in 15 years time. They realise that isn't the case when a new bunch of pretty young things hit the scene.

So much pressure. Pressure to have kids, pressure to look good, menopause, periods, sexism in society, being restricted to certain industries...


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^ yes thats the total brutal truth tbh.
( coming from a diffrent concept ) seeing my mum struggle to some of these reasons after being left by my dad i totally agree... it hard being indepandant female from a certain age onwards
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(Original post by datpiff)
Being a woman is amazing when you're under 25. Being a woman slowly starts to suck once you get past 25. Some women when they turn 18 think they have it made and think they'll have the same sexual power they have in 15 years time. They realise that isn't the case when a new bunch of pretty young things hit the scene.

So much pressure. Pressure to have kids, pressure to look good, menopause, periods, sexism in society, being restricted to certain industries...


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I wholly agree though the 25 age is stressing me as I am less than 4 months away from that cut off and not even engaged!
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inthedark1
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(Original post by datpiff)
Being a woman is amazing when you're under 25. Being a woman slowly starts to suck once you get past 25. Some women when they turn 18 think they have it made and think they'll have the same sexual power they have in 15 years time. They realise that isn't the case when a new bunch of pretty young things hit the scene.

So much pressure. Pressure to have kids, pressure to look good, menopause, periods, sexism in society, being restricted to certain industries...


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Being under 25 wasn't amazing for me though, I was just anxious, dressed like a lad and wasn't attractive at all. I've only just started putting effort in now so it's like that's it I've missed my chance. I work out, keep my body tight etc I was under the impression that that might help but according to Internet forums men just go off age/youth.
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abc_1234
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I like older women. Would love to date one in the range 26-35.
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datpiff
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(Original post by cyndikinz)
^ yes thats the total brutal truth tbh.
( coming from a diffrent concept ) seeing my mum struggle to some of these reasons after being left by my dad i totally agree... it hard being indepandant female from a certain age onwards
A lot of men on here seem to be jealous of women sometimes (they can easily get sex), but they don't think how much it sucks to be a woman past 25. The only women they're exposed to are the 'young little things' in the clubs. Women are seen to be at their peak at 18 which is sad.

I'd disagree myself as I love mature women, but the way society is sucks.


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