But mum, why should I pay to live with you? Watch

Igor3k
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Hi there guys!

I have an issue to talk about. Last year I've started an apprenticeship which for today gives me £9/h 45h a week. I know, it's not too bad, but having to drive about 600 miles a week it puts some expenses. I have had my girlfriend move in with me couple of months ago and exactly 6 months ago my parents have purchased their own home in which we're now all living. But things aren't that easy... My parents work both full time and are in... quite a dept having two cars on finance, mortgage and all household bills to pay, on top of that the house needs a lot of work on it so they're spending much more than they make. Here comes me and my other half, she works for an agency and does 2-5 days a week with variable pay and me, again with
£9/h we've been asked to start paying them money for living in the house because they can't keep up with the bills themselves. What I see as unfair is that in less than 3 weeks they're off to Turkey for their £1000 holidays, just bought a new set of drawers for the bathroom and are planning on sofas for the second living room (as if sofas in the first one weren't enough). I have about £310 monthly insurance, £260 car finance as my last car broke pretty quickly because of high mileage and a loan of £3000 which I'm paying back monthly at £300 and right now me and my girlfriend are trying to move out so we can start living on our own, but I can't save up money because they're making me pay for the things in the house.
What should I do?!
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Good bloke
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(Original post by Igor3k)
Hi there guys!

I have an issue to talk about. Last year I've started an apprenticeship which for today gives me £9/h 45h a week. I know, it's not too bad, but having to drive about 600 miles a week it puts some expenses. I have had my girlfriend move in with me couple of months ago and exactly 6 months ago my parents have purchased their own home in which we're now all living. But things aren't that easy... My parents work both full time and are in... quite a dept having two cars on finance, mortgage and all household bills to pay, on top of that the house needs a lot of work on it so they're spending much more than they make. Here comes me and my other half, she works for an agency and does 2-5 days a week with variable pay and me, again with
£9/h we've been asked to start paying them money for living in the house because they can't keep up with the bills themselves. What I see as unfair is that in less than 3 weeks they're off to Turkey for their £1000 holidays, just bought a new set of drawers for the bathroom and are planning on sofas for the second living room (as if sofas in the first one weren't enough). I have about £310 monthly insurance, £260 car finance as my last car broke pretty quickly because of high mileage and a loan of £3000 which I'm paying back monthly at £300 and right now me and my girlfriend are trying to move out so we can start living on our own, but I can't save up money because they're making me pay for the things in the house.
What should I do?!
Stop expecting your parents to subsidise you and your girlfriend and either make a contribution as requested or move out and make your own way elsewhere. Do you really think they owe you a living for all your life?
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Harvey Dent
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Their house, their rules. If you've been asked to pay your way then you stop scrounging and do it, especially if you've brought your girlfriend back to live with you in your debt-riddled household (**** move, by the way).
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Igor3k
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I don't think I've explained the whole picture right. Since we've moved in I've contributed to many things like renting out a van to move, paid for some materials, just generally paid for may things. Since march I've chipped out £840 on the house, but what bugs me now is that they say that they can't afford to pay bills when they're off for holidays which frankly even I couldn't afford to go to at all this year. I've tried and save money up just so I have enough to move out but with my the expenses I've had I wasn't able to and still they keep on expecting me to fund stuff like ceramic pots for dozens of my mum's flowers because she "needs" them. I wouldn't mind paying if they really were struggling. Aren't parents supposed to support us to be able to start being independent?
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41b
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A £1000 holiday isn't much. They are probably sinking and feel trapped.

My parents are the same sometimes. They buy stuff to feel better about themselves. They are in a very healthy financial situation, however.

Old people need to live in decent accomodation. As I've aged I've become far pickier about the way I live. I can't live in mess like when I was a kid. I will kill every mouse within a 5 mile radius.

In your case I think it's fair to pay your parents rent. Not a huge amount but there's no reason you can't cover the cost of your food and electricity. You're earning enough to make yourself financially neutral for them. And, at the end of it, if your parents are responsible enough, you will inherit all or some of what's theirs.
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KWCFC
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Jesus your a grown adult
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Dalilsp
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Your £840 has nothing on at least 18 years of food/clothing/shelter
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Good bloke
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(Original post by Igor3k)
I don't think I've explained the whole picture right. Since we've moved in I've contributed to many things like renting out a van to move, paid for some materials, just generally paid for may things. Since march I've chipped out £840 on the house, but what bugs me now is that they say that they can't afford to pay bills when they're off for holidays which frankly even I couldn't afford to go to at all this year. I've tried and save money up just so I have enough to move out but with my the expenses I've had I wasn't able to and still they keep on expecting me to fund stuff like ceramic pots for dozens of my mum's flowers because she "needs" them. I wouldn't mind paying if they really were struggling. Aren't parents supposed to support us to be able to start being independent?
Agree a fair rent that takes account of your food and girlfriend and leave it at that. Their hobbies, holidays and interests are their own affair.
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Bobbi!
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(Original post by Igor3k)
Hi there guys!

I have an issue to talk about. Last year I've started an apprenticeship which for today gives me £9/h 45h a week. I know, it's not too bad, but having to drive about 600 miles a week it puts some expenses. I have had my girlfriend move in with me couple of months ago and exactly 6 months ago my parents have purchased their own home in which we're now all living. But things aren't that easy... My parents work both full time and are in... quite a dept having two cars on finance, mortgage and all household bills to pay, on top of that the house needs a lot of work on it so they're spending much more than they make. Here comes me and my other half, she works for an agency and does 2-5 days a week with variable pay and me, again with
£9/h we've been asked to start paying them money for living in the house because they can't keep up with the bills themselves. What I see as unfair is that in less than 3 weeks they're off to Turkey for their £1000 holidays, just bought a new set of drawers for the bathroom and are planning on sofas for the second living room (as if sofas in the first one weren't enough). I have about £310 monthly insurance, £260 car finance as my last car broke pretty quickly because of high mileage and a loan of £3000 which I'm paying back monthly at £300 and right now me and my girlfriend are trying to move out so we can start living on our own, but I can't save up money because they're making me pay for the things in the house.
What should I do?!

Sounds like you're on a pretty good wage and should be able to afford to pay your parents some rent. Especially once you include your girlfriend's wages as well!! Maybe your parents want you to realise that there will be costs when you live on your own. Maybe they want you out and think that you're still there cos they give you an easy life?
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doodle_333
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don't be so selfish, it doesn't matter what your parents choose to spend their money on, if you want to live their you'll have to pay them what they ask for, presumably it's still far less than normal rent costs so stop complaining and appreciate the fact they are happy for you and your girlfriend to move in
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Tiger Rag
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You are costing them money. Move out if you're not happy.

You sound like my cousin. Him and his girlfriend paid his parents £50 pw each. The rent on the hous was £480 pcm. He'd somehow decided he was subsiding everyone else, clearly forgetting that bills cost money too.

Why should you stay there rent free?
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junior.doctor
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You are an adult earning money. As is your girlfriend. Therefore you should contribute to the household you are living in. This is normal adult behaviour. You are using your parents' electricity, water, tv, loo rolls etc etc etc, therefore you help pay for them.

My parents' rules were always very simple. Full time education: do not need to pay rent. Not in full time education: must contribute to the household, either with unemployment benefit or wages. The amount to contribute was still less than living independently would have been.
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Profesh
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(Original post by Good bloke)
Agree a fair rent that takes account of your food and girlfriend and leave it at that. Their hobbies, holidays and interests are their own affair.
This.
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RyRy1998
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(Original post by Igor3k)
Hi there guys!

I have an issue to talk about. Last year I've started an apprenticeship which for today gives me £9/h 45h a week. I know, it's not too bad, but having to drive about 600 miles a week it puts some expenses. I have had my girlfriend move in with me couple of months ago and exactly 6 months ago my parents have purchased their own home in which we're now all living. But things aren't that easy... My parents work both full time and are in... quite a dept having two cars on finance, mortgage and all household bills to pay, on top of that the house needs a lot of work on it so they're spending much more than they make. Here comes me and my other half, she works for an agency and does 2-5 days a week with variable pay and me, again with
£9/h we've been asked to start paying them money for living in the house because they can't keep up with the bills themselves. What I see as unfair is that in less than 3 weeks they're off to Turkey for their £1000 holidays, just bought a new set of drawers for the bathroom and are planning on sofas for the second living room (as if sofas in the first one weren't enough). I have about £310 monthly insurance, £260 car finance as my last car broke pretty quickly because of high mileage and a loan of £3000 which I'm paying back monthly at £300 and right now me and my girlfriend are trying to move out so we can start living on our own, but I can't save up money because they're making me pay for the things in the house.
What should I do?!
Let me put some things into perspective for you, I'm now 24, I only moved out 6 months ago, I've had a part time job since 16 untill I left college and got a 9-5 that payed £1650 a month after tax.

My parents, asked me to pay 1/4 off my wages, That included any food I wnated, my washing and Ironing was done, Elctric, Gas, Toiletries. basically They asked for £412.50 to live bill free, Bearing in mind to live on my own I would of been hitting £1200 easilly just on those things, I thought that was incredibly fair! I actually paid them £550. I thought that was more reasonable, That left me £1100 which covered my Car finance (£295) My insurance and petrol (£350) my phone contract and any other exspenses I had, Anything that was left went into a savings account so I could move.

I didn't even have my ex living there.... What they're asking is incredibly reasonable. Pay it.
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PinkMobilePhone
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you and your girlfriend should be paying your shares of the utilities and council tax, as well as either buying your own food/toiletries/household cleaning products etc or giving your parents enough money to buy these things for you.
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nohomo
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Freeload as much as you can
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dakanabelle
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Think about it this way, if you moved out of your parent's house you'd have to pay rent, bills (gas, electric, water), council tax for your girlfriend (assuming she's not in any kind of education), car insurance, petrol, food etc etc. You could do a lot worse than paying your parents some rent, they'll probably charge you a lot less than any landlord would. Even though you may contribute to expenses now, remember that you're not actually paying for them in their entirety.

So in short, if you don't like it. You could always move out.
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