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Why is everyone having kids or settling down? watch

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    I ask myself this everyday. I get asked this when I'm back where I'm from all the time:

    'Do you have a girlfriend yet'
    'Do you have any kids?'

    I don't get why people who are 24-26 in 2014 would want to settle down and have kids. I just don't get it. It's like everyone has a flipping pram around here! It's like every girl has moved in with her boyfriend as well.

    It's like I'm treat like some sort of weird person round here just because I'm not settling down at 26 with a girlfriend and/or having kids!


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    (Original post by datpiff)
    I ask myself this everyday. I get asked this when I'm back where I'm from all the time:

    'Do you have a girlfriend yet'
    'Do you have any kids?'

    I don't get why people who are 24-26 in 2014 would want to settle down and have kids. I just don't get it. It's like everyone has a flipping pram around here! It's like every girl has moved in with her boyfriend as well.

    It's like I'm treat like some sort of weird person round here just because I'm not settling down at 26 with a girlfriend and/or having kids!


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    I find that there comes a point in life when your priorities start to change. Might be wrong though. If that hasn't happened for you, that's absolutely fine. Everyone is different and has different ambitions in life. If starting a family isn't for you, I wouldn't worry that it might be for those around you.
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    Maybe because you're at an age when people wouldn't see it as abnormal for you to start thinking about settling down and starting a family? Okay sure it might not be your cup of tea, but it's kind of what most people in the world do, hence why the human population hasn't died out yet.
    It's not weird that people might think it'd be one of your life goals.
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    (Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
    Maybe because you're at an age when people wouldn't see it as abnormal for you to start thinking about settling down and starting a family? Okay sure it might not be your cup of tea, but it's kind of what most people in the world do, hence why the human population hasn't died out yet.
    It's not weird that people might think it'd be one of your life goals.
    Not in the direct sense, but is ****ing weird that procreation is considered a sensible life goal in an already overly populated world and people who shun the "settling down and having kids" game in order to live for the moment and enjoy life are considered the backwards ones.
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    (Original post by MrMacho)
    Not in the direct sense, but is ****ing weird that procreation is considered a sensible life goal in an already overly populated world and people who shun the "settling down and having kids" game in order to live for the moment and enjoy life are considered the backwards ones.
    I don't think it's weird for your family elders for example to hope for grandchildren...
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    (Original post by PinkMobilePhone)
    I don't think it's weird for your family elders for example to hope for grandchildren...
    Yes. It is. If your parents or grandparents expect or hope for you to provide them with grandchildren they are putting there own desires above your own right to decide what happens to your own body
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    (Original post by MrMacho)
    Not in the direct sense, but is ****ing weird that procreation is considered a sensible life goal in an already overly populated world and people who shun the "settling down and having kids" game in order to live for the moment and enjoy life are considered the backwards ones.
    We could look at the flip logic and call it weird that an individual in the prime of his life doesn't want to procreate?
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    (Original post by datpiff)
    I ask myself this everyday. I get asked this when I'm back where I'm from all the time:

    'Do you have a girlfriend yet'
    'Do you have any kids?'

    I don't get why people who are 24-26 in 2014 would want to settle down and have kids. I just don't get it. It's like everyone has a flipping pram around here! It's like every girl has moved in with her boyfriend as well.

    It's like I'm treat like some sort of weird person round here just because I'm not settling down at 26 with a girlfriend and/or having kids!


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    I agree.
    Settling down is just something I do not admire nor desire.
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    This is mainly a social class issue, I'm guessing youre from a fairly working class background where its typical for people to get married and have kids early in life. Among the middle class this generally happens later, usually from late 20s to mid 30.
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    (Original post by djpailo)
    We could look at the flip logic and call it weird that an individual in the prime of his life doesn't want to procreate?
    Not at all - extra expense, bringing a child into a fundamentally unfair and cruel world. Having to revolve your life around caring for the sprog etc.
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    Women start becoming more likely to produce ****ed up babies somewhere in their 30's, a lot of them want their baby-making out of the way before then.
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    (Original post by poohat)
    This is mainly a social class issue, I'm guessing youre from a fairly working class background where its typical for people to get married and have kids early in life. Among the middle class this generally happens later, usually from late 20s to mid 30.
    Since there is no such thing as a 'working class' anymore, your comment seems rather outdated.


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    (Original post by MrMacho)
    Yes. It is. If your parents or grandparents expect or hope for you to provide them with grandchildren they are putting there own desires above your own right to decide what happens to your own body
    Rubbish. You might hope that your child should grow up to go to university and get a good career, whereas he might just have his heart set on being a brick-layer.
    Doesn't mean you aren't going to support him in his choices in life, but it's certainly not WRONG to have certain hopes and desires for your child, even if those hopes and desires do not manifest.
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    Op I feel exactly the same. At 27, most if not ALL of my school friends have at least 2 kids, are married or engaged, and I definitely feel like I'm the only one that isn't.

    I just fail to see how they could afford these kids, I want to know what jobs they got!!
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    I plan not to have kids ever. I'm sorry but I'd probably neglect my child and it'll die because I'm an avid gamer and cosplayer and childrearing doesn't fit into that.
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    Some places are just like that... Hartlepool I'm looking squarely at you! They're kind of nowhere towns that people just get stuck in and end up living life like almost everyone else who lives there. People tend to settle down early, get unremarkable jobs varying in quality between good and breadline. They then go on to live life in a small town with a small town mentality, probably never leaving and having any major drivers taken out of their life by their contentedness at being settled and having kids. My Mum is forever asking me about girlfriends and the only answer I have for her at the minute is "all in good time." I'm 20 now so there is still oodles of time but I think because my Mum was engaged at 19, married at 22, with child at 24 she thinks that this kind of timeline is fairly standard, she acknowledges she was pretty young but then says people becoming Dad's at 30 are getting on a bit so her variance isn't much at all!
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    I suppose in a way having children is a way of making sure you are remembered after you have died, this is one of the few ways most people can hope for such a legacy.

    Personally kids aren't for me, I don't hate them, I just want my life to be about me, not my offspring, it is rare that a person can juggle being a good parent and do all the activities, hobbys and socialising they did before becoming a parent.


    However at a certain point your social circles start becoming populated by married couples and parents, your ability to socialise with them is effected, they start prefering play dates or couples dates over hanging with their friend who in their eyes hasn't got his life together ...because he is enjoying the freedom of not raising a child ...or being married. I dunno, I'm sure it's lovely, but it would do my head it.
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    (Original post by bubadeeboop)
    I suppose in a way having children is a way of making sure you are remembered after you have died, this is one of the few ways most people can hope for such a legacy.

    Personally kids aren't for me, I
    don't hate them, I just want my life to be about me, not my offspring, it is rare that a person can juggle being a good parent and do all the activities, hobbys and socialising they did before becoming a parent.


    However at a certain point your social circles start becoming populated by married couples and parents, your ability to socialise with them is effected, they start prefering play dates or couples dates over hanging with their friend who in their eyes hasn't got his life together ...because he is enjoying the freedom of not raising a child ...or being married. I dunno, I'm sure it's lovely, but it would do my head it.




    Me too :five:
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    I don't particularly get it either. I see kids younger than me getting engaged, buying houses and having babies... I mean, what's the rush?! I'm nearly 26 now and tbh I'm at a stage where I feel I could live with my boyfriend within the next year or so, but I still want my freedom... Definitely no kids for me for a while! There's so much I still want to do first.

    I'm also really glad I went to uni twice. I feel I definitely milked my late teens/early 20s for all they were worth. It don't get why so many people are desperate to grow up so soon. Enjoy your youth! You're gonna be an adult for the rest of your life!
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    (Original post by MrMacho)
    Not in the direct sense, but is ****ing weird that procreation is considered a sensible life goal in an already overly populated world and people who shun the "settling down and having kids" game in order to live for the moment and enjoy life are considered the backwards ones.
    Hear hear.
 
 
 
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