pregnancy-blokes vs girls

Hey fiance thinks she might be pregnant... I'm at uni, she's back home. I'm trying so hard to look at it practically cos with me at uni and broke as anything, theres no way we could have a baby, just wouldnt be fair on her or the child, but she is finding it tough to agree. Plus she's in her last year of school, so important time for her. I can't just quit uni and she definately can't do this while she's doing her A-levels. What should I do, cos she thinks I don't care etc etc...? Obviously being a bloke I can't imagine how hard it would be for her to go through this, but how do I get her to see that its just not the best time??

Reply 1

username47781

First thing your fiance needs to do is take a pregnancy test to be sure.

Reply 2

blue_foil

She has and its positive

Reply 3

username47781

blue_foil

She has and its positive

But i thought you said she thiinks she might be pregnant, thinking and actually being pregnant is a bit different.

But since she took the test and it's postive then obviously she is.

If she decides to keep the baby then you are liable for child maintenance whether you like that or not and whether you choose to stay with her.

Obviously tell her you two cannot afford it but if she wants to keep it then unfortunatly you can't stop her.

Did neither of you use protection? Or did something go wrong?

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

You might say right now it's not a good time but I bet if you kept the baby in 10 years' time or whatever you wouldn't be telling your child that you wish you'd had him or her aborted. She's pregnant and it's both your responsibilities, not something that should just be shirked off because it's not convenient. She can always take a year or two our of school or something. Won't be easy, but that's why an unwanted pregnancy needs to be avoided in the first place by contraception or abstinence.

Reply 5

lolly83

make sure she's aware of her options
http://www.brook.org.uk/content/
then you need to make a decision, it's not an easy one.
I had my daughter at seventeen, but sacrifices where made.
In the end it's her decision, abortion is easy short term, but it's not you that has to deal with the moral implications of it. Sorry if that sounds harsh but if ou pressurise her into something, she won't thank you for it.

Reply 6

frost105

You have to back off really nd let her make the decision and support her when you can. She's the one who would have to have the abortion and live with it so you have to give her room to decide whether she can do that.

Reply 7

ItsJustMe

Just keep talking to her. Don't fight about it, but openly communicate each of your concerns because you're in this together. Remind her that you're there for her no matter what her decision is and that you're not her enemy on this...but that you really don't feel like it's time and you'd like to at least discuss the possibilties.

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