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1 girl, 2 guys

Hey,

Bit of a dilemma type thing.
There is this girl that likes me, great! but she also likes this other guy. not so great.
She can't decide who to pick as she got cheated on about 4 months ago thus doesn't want one of us to cheat.
I know in my heart of heart's I wouldnt cheat and have told her, but when you are in that situation I guess your trust might be slightly screwed up.

But she is meant to be going on a date with him tomorrow, but I have done a bit of research and he sound's like a bit of an arse, spoke to his ex's and they hav been less then impressed with him.
I want to try and convince her i'm the better choice without having to tell her the other guy might be a bit of a tit! As this might knock her future trust in her decisions and things please help :smile:

Reply 1

prettygreeneyes99

9

being cheated on is no excuse for not being able to pick a guy... there's no way you can tell whether or not someone's going to cheat on you until they do it.. or dont. lol

Reply 2

2late

13

I can imagine how you feel! The temptation to tell her what he is like, or whether to hold back... but then you might risk losing her.

Personally I'd wait and see how it goes. Talk to her about how she feels, and see if "he" has an "advantage".. if you feel you have strong evidence to support that he really is an arse, then ask for one of the ex's you spoke to to do you a favour (depending on how well you get on with them?). Alternatively, say it's for the best of that girl that might be gettin hurt soon and that she needs advice, and ask the guy's ex to speak directly to your beloved one.

Hope that sliiightly helps.. :smile:

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

OP

Im also more her age, we are both 17 and the other guy is 20, does that make much different?

I go to her college, so she could see if I was with any other girl, as it would be kind of obvious, so she need not worry about cheating! And the thought of cheating makes me sick.

Reply 4

generalebriety

16

Anonymous

Im also more her age, we are both 17 and the other guy is 20, does that make much different?

I go to her college, so she could see if I was with any other girl, as it would be kind of obvious, so she need not worry about cheating! And the thought of cheating makes me sick.

I agree with the poster above you - if it's possible for an ex to have a word with her telling her what an arse the other guy is, that might help. It does all sound horribly competitive though. In the end, if she prefers him, she will go for him and trust him no matter what his past is like. It's not a job application.

Reply 5

stonedduck

talk to her about it as a friend. don't make a move yet with regards to a relationship, just take her aside and tell her as a friend, then let her make her own mind up without trying to convince her to go out with you or anything :smile:

then, either she'll believe you or find out about him herself and trust you a little more for looking out for her rather than trying to 'win' any kind of competition over her with this other guy.

the getting someone else to tell her idea could also work, just watch that word doesn't get round that it was you who got someone to tell her that else she may lose trust in you.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

It feels horribly competitive trust me.

Reply 7

Daisy Chain

well at the end of the day she makes the choice so i wudnt try AND PUT HER OFF SHE NEEDS TO MAKE HER OWN MISTAKES

Reply 8

2late

13

Anonymous

Im also more her age, we are both 17 and the other guy is 20, does that make much different?

She might feel more secure with him due to the age difference and the experience he has with girls. I've noticed that girls tend to go for older guys for that reason... it's sad but true.

Although it depends on what sort of person you are? If she can see a mature, trustworthy person in you then I'm sure she will appreciate it more than some 20 year old player.

Good luck!

Reply 9

dutch_stud

When you love someone set em free, if they come back, they are yours, if they dont, they never were.

Reply 10

2late

13

Then again on the other hand, after picking one of you guys, she might have second thoughts about whether she made the right decision in 'picking' her boyfriend. You should be prepared for this also.

Reply 11

Richy_Boi

12

There i was expecting this thread to be about a threesome.

I can't help but feel let down.

Reply 12

fruitcake

2

ha i hate to say it, but i feel let down too, i had some good stories to swap!

Reply 13

Richy_Boi

12

Dirty girl! :wink:

Reply 14

fruitcake

2

ha ha i didn't necessarily say they were about me did I?! necessarily...

Reply 15

Eddy123

i have to ask dude where is your self worth? Your sitting around hoping that she'll 'pick' you? Why are you valuing this girl higher than yourself?

This is very unattractive behaviour, if you want to win her tell her you won't accept being cast aside while she tries out other guys, be a MAN, stand up for yourself.

Reply 16

dutch_stud

Eddy123

i have to ask dude where is your self worth? Your sitting around hoping that she'll 'pick' you? Why are you valuing this girl higher than yourself?

This is very unattractive behaviour, if you want to win her tell her you won't accept being cast aside while she tries out other guys, be a MAN, stand up for yourself.