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My old friend might be pregnant and she's only fifteen..
I used to be friends with a girl in my form a few years back, but things transpired and she drifted away from my group of friends in favour of some other people. We talk every so often still, but it's mainly just polite chat and she said a few things about me behind my back since then so it's not really the same. She's still fairly good friends with my best friend though, and they're quite close.
Anyway, yesterday my best friend had her sixteenth birthday party, and I noticed that this girl wasn't there even though she'd been invited. She'd been really looking forward to it apparently, so I found it a bit odd. I asked my friend if she knew where she was, and she looked a bit uncomfortable for a few minutes, before dragging me to a corner and telling me she was at the pregnancy clinic because she might be pregnant.
Even though we're not friends anymore, I can't stop thinking about it and I feel terrible for her. Apparently she thinks she could be as far as 3 months gone. She's only 15, and we're right in the middle of our GCSEs at a grammar school where there's a great emphasis to do well in your exams.
Is there anything I can do? I don't know all the details.. I mean I don't know if she went to the clinic to get tested.. although she could do this at home surely? Or if she knows she definitely is, and she went along for a check up or support.
I feel helpless.. and I suppose there isn't a great deal I can do considering I'm not sure if she even would want me to know, so I can't offer her my sympathy or anything. I just wish there was something I could do to help. I can't stop thinking about it, but I can't talk to anyone about it, because my best friend doesn't really think there's much to say about it and is keeping to herself.
Anyway, yesterday my best friend had her sixteenth birthday party, and I noticed that this girl wasn't there even though she'd been invited. She'd been really looking forward to it apparently, so I found it a bit odd. I asked my friend if she knew where she was, and she looked a bit uncomfortable for a few minutes, before dragging me to a corner and telling me she was at the pregnancy clinic because she might be pregnant.
Even though we're not friends anymore, I can't stop thinking about it and I feel terrible for her. Apparently she thinks she could be as far as 3 months gone. She's only 15, and we're right in the middle of our GCSEs at a grammar school where there's a great emphasis to do well in your exams.
Is there anything I can do? I don't know all the details.. I mean I don't know if she went to the clinic to get tested.. although she could do this at home surely? Or if she knows she definitely is, and she went along for a check up or support.
I feel helpless.. and I suppose there isn't a great deal I can do considering I'm not sure if she even would want me to know, so I can't offer her my sympathy or anything. I just wish there was something I could do to help. I can't stop thinking about it, but I can't talk to anyone about it, because my best friend doesn't really think there's much to say about it and is keeping to herself.
Reply 1
Doesn't sound good at all if she won't even talk to you, but if she hasn't been tested she needs to take a test to be sure to find out. Is the boyfriend still with her?
Unfortunatly there ain't much you can do if she won't talk to her apart from be there if she needs you, although you could write her a letter telling how concerned you are about her.
Unfortunatly there ain't much you can do if she won't talk to her apart from be there if she needs you, although you could write her a letter telling how concerned you are about her.
Reply 2
In situations like this is usually best to .. perhaps subtly talk to them and bring it up, then see if she mentions it - if she does you can support her and it can bring you two a whole lot closer..
she probably needs you at a time like this more htan anythig in the world but is probably too shy 2 admit it
she probably needs you at a time like this more htan anythig in the world but is probably too shy 2 admit it
Reply 3
Carl1982
Doesn't sound good at all if she won't even talk to you, but if she hasn't been tested she needs to take a test to be sure to find out. Is the boyfriend still with her?
Unfortunatly there ain't much you can do if she won't talk to her apart from be there if she needs you, although you could write her a letter telling how concerned you are about her.
Unfortunatly there ain't much you can do if she won't talk to her apart from be there if she needs you, although you could write her a letter telling how concerned you are about her.
She does still talk to me, and she sometimes acts as if things are still exactly as they were four odd years ago.. it's just she does this to quite a few people- is perfectly nice to them to their face and then tells everyone she hates them behind their back. So I'm always a bit cautious, because my best friend told me this girl often says she doesn't like me to her.
Unfortunately she just broke up with the person I assume is the father because she liked someone else. He was devastated to break up with her.. so perhaps could want to be around if she kept it? But they're both only 15- he could be 16 at the most.
I wouldn't do anything. Whether or not she should keep the baby is her decision, and I'm sure she has plenty of people around her to offer her help and support, whether friends, family, or the school. If you're no lkonger friends, to interfere would be to pry, and if she bitched about you behind her back, she probably isn't worth the effort.
Sorry to be so blunt, but it's probably best for you and her.
Sorry to be so blunt, but it's probably best for you and her.
Reply 5
dutch_stud
In situations like this is usually best to .. perhaps subtly talk to them and bring it up, then see if she mentions it - if she does you can support her and it can bring you two a whole lot closer..
she probably needs you at a time like this more htan anythig in the world but is probably too shy 2 admit it
she probably needs you at a time like this more htan anythig in the world but is probably too shy 2 admit it
Indeed, I mean while she might not have ever dreamed of telling me herself; now that someone else knows she might be a little relieved perhaps.. she needs all the support she can get I suppose.
Reply 6
Carl
I wouldn't do anything. Whether or not she should keep the baby is her decision, and I'm sure she has plenty of people around her to offer her help and support, whether friends, family, or the school. If you're no lkonger friends, to interfere would be to pry, and if she bitched about you behind her back, she probably isn't worth the effort.
Sorry to be so blunt, but it's probably best for you and her.
Sorry to be so blunt, but it's probably best for you and her.
You're right- although she hasn't told anyone other than my best friend yet I think. In some ways, even though it's selfish, I wish I didn't know. Because I know it's not my place to pry, considering we aren't that great friends.. but I feel somehow involved even though I'm only connected by the fact that I know.
Reply 9
lilac!!
omg!!!
okay im like the same age as her! she needs a slap across the face
to tell you the truth if you do want to help, you gotta explain to her that this isnt right however i dont think you should do anything as its not your problem!
okay im like the same age as her! she needs a slap across the face
to tell you the truth if you do want to help, you gotta explain to her that this isnt right however i dont think you should do anything as its not your problem!
Ditto- she's a few months older than me, but I can't imagine how I would feel if I was going through that.
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