The Student Room Group

Obsessed Over a Girl

There's a girl I work with whom I'm totally and utterly obsessed with. Every minute I'm in work I'm thinking about her, and when I'm not in work I'm thinking about when I'm next going to work with her. I tried asking her out but she said 'no'. This is understandable because although we get on just fine, there's no chemistry or flirting between us. This is very odd and has got me confused because I can't normally talk to a girl without being accused of flirting, but with this particular girl my head goes blank and I'm scared to touch her. I can't seem to compliment her or mess with her. All I do is ask the same boring questions, again, and again.

When I asked her out she just said, 'no', so I found it easy to get over her. However soon after I hear she has a boyfriend so my interest is sparked again because I'm thinking, 'well what if she didn't have a boyfriend?' (and why didn't she tell me she had a boyfriend?)

I guess I'm posting her for advice on what to do if you were in my situation. I'm thinking I would like to become close friends, and if things don't work out between her and her boyfriend, then I'm in a good position to maybe ask her out. On the other hand I'm thinking it would be easier to get a job elsewhere and forget about her completely. I don’t know what I want to do, I only know that a night out with her would be bliss.
Reply 1
Don't rape her.
Reply 2
Don't rape her.


Do you call that a sense of humour or are you one of those people who were born without a brain?

I'd like some constructive comments and for the idiots to stay away.
Reply 3
I was being serious...you're trying to get yourself into a position where you can compromise her in whatever way possible....

scenarios like: "how do i become a close friend so if she breaks up i can get in there"

+ Every time you get rejected you will get more angry with her and think she deserves it more etc etc

It's really not healthy for you.
Reply 4
I was being serious...you're trying to get yourself into a position where you can compromise her in whatever way possible....

scenarios like: "how do i become a close friend so if she breaks up i can get in there"

+ Every time you get rejected you will get more angry with her and think she deserves it more etc etc

It's really not healthy for you.


So I should just get a new job and move on? I'm in my third year at Uni, and next year I plan to move back to Ireland so I'll be leaving my life here behind anyway. Getting over her sounds like the best idea, why the flipping heck didn't realise this 5 mins ago before I posted. Feck!
Reply 5
Yep exactly, despite the fact you're probably being sarcastic :p: Stay well clear, and find another nice girl who appreciates you more :smile:
Reply 6
Yeah, you kinda need to back off quickly. Its really unhealthy to be that obsessed with someone, especially one who is clearly not interested in you. Just move on mate.
compliments compliments-the best way to start off a relationship...that is you dont talk to her much "wow,i like ur hair! did u do something different with it?" that sorta thing
Well you asked thats the main thing, but i would just move on, there's lots of other girls out there, but you can still stay friends with this girl.
Reply 9
Princess In Disguise
compliments compliments-the best way to start off a relationship...that is you dont talk to her much "wow,i like ur hair! did u do something different with it?" that sorta thing


Heh, i can't believe you're actually giving him tips on how to get close to a girl that has a boyfriend, has flat-out refused to go out with him and who he has a really unhealthy obsession for. Walk away OP, and play it a lot cooler with the next girl you meet, try talking to them before you start thinking about them in every waking moment.
Reply 10
Princess In Disguise
compliments compliments-the best way to start off a relationship...that is you dont talk to her much "wow,i like ur hair! did u do something different with it?" that sorta thing


You sure you read the opening post fully?
Reply 11
Princess In Disguise
compliments compliments-the best way to start off a relationship...that is you dont talk to her much "wow,i like ur hair! did u do something different with it?" that sorta thing


I started mine with words like bitch and **** you :biggrin:

god, that girl must really love me :smile:
Reply 12
samba
I started mine with words like bitch and **** you :biggrin:

god, that girl must really love me :smile:


Seriously? and I thought I was bad..
Reply 13
ya, but in a joking way ya know. She's told me she doesn't like me being mean to her anymore, so i've ceased :p: Just rough sex now...
Reply 14
The only advice I can suggest is get over it, as she has made her feelings clear. Move on, find someone else and see how it goes. It's nothing personal she just doesn't feel the same. As they say "Life Goes On".
Reply 15
samba
ya, but in a joking way ya know. She's told me she doesn't like me being mean to her anymore, so i've ceased :p:


Oh yeah I get it, jokingly is fine :wink:

samba
Just rough sex now...


Haha, wasnt expecting that