I just dont feel.. right. Watch
Over the last year and a half ive felt depressed, not upset but to the point where I dont want to talk, eat and something that is arising more each day, being here. I just feel like im irrelevant to everyone.. Im not a lonely guy, I have quite a few close friends, a girlfriend who I love to bits and I have a healthy relationship with my family but the problem is that I just feel like I am a failure to all, I have no idea what I want to do with my future, im studying A-Levels which I dont enjoy and want nothing to do with in the future but I was too scared to leave school because I dont know what else to do.. How am I going to be able to pay for a house, start a family etc in the future when all I am is a nervous, undecided idiot.
I havent been diagnosed with depression but I also havent been to check as I dont want family thinking less of me, I just think it would be easier to not be here but I know I wouldnt have the courage to put thoughts into action.
Im sorry once again as I know people have reasons for their problems and I know mines are silly. I just needed to tell someone.
You do need to get a diagnosis if you have been feeling like this for a while now. The girlfriend you love to bits? I'm sure she'll understand, girls go through depressive periods more often than boys (and it's somehow "more acceptable" for them to admit it and "less acceptable" for boys to - stigma innit )
Oh and I bet you anything more than 90% of your mates have had the same kind of thoughts- I know I have. People put so much pressure on people at age 17 to 18 to decide the rest of their future- who the hell knows anyway? It's way too young! And most people changing careers a few times down the line.
If you feel like you wanna go to the doctor go, but I reckon once you chat to at least 1 person about it you should feel at least a bit better.