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Depicting rare life situations without sounding arrogant
Dear everyone, I hope you read and consider the following with a bit of understanding.
First of all, today is my birthday and it's early morning. I should be sleeping and preparing for a sunny day.
Yet, for the sake of understanding how to improve my online social life (which in a modern era has a large impact on the development of one's physical life - at least, in my case it is; without internet I wouldn't have found info on university, people from other countries, opinions etc..), I couldn't fall asleep, and I'm here to ask you straightforwardly how I can solve what is probably my greatest personal problem.
In physical life I've never encountered this problem; to me, personally, this is only an online or written-communication phenomena.
I have already asked this once, and although a majority of people acknowledged my views, when it came to the actual behaviour, I've often felt let down.
What ails me?
The fact that, e.g. on a forum like this one, in order to ask for advice or even give advice, I can't report factual backgrounds of a situation or condition that might be unique and extraordinary - both negatively and positively - without being immediately tagged as arrogant.
What do I mean with this?
An extreme example would be a forum-addicted member of the royal family asking for advice on a factor in his personal life, based on the values he grew up around, which might obviously be different from those of the majority of forum-ers.
The example might be "extreme" to me and a majority of others, but how can we judge whether the person EXPERIENCING it doesn't perceive it as absolutely normal?
Maybe the prince would like some advice, some sincere and small opinion, on how he should dress to see a "common girl".
"I usually wear golden pijamas, but I would like to be modest this time. What about Armani, Calvin Klein, etc.?"
I'm not saying that I'm a member of the royal family, but what I expect more or less from a forum like this one is perception of arrogance, or at least a huge barrage of skepsis and personal attacks that are not targeted at the topic itself but at the person who wrote it.
I don't know whether there are princes and princesses visiting this forum (especially this subforum), but I'm sure that in such a big forum which is so famous for education and as far as I know is highly ranked on search machines, etc., there surely are some "exceptional" people who need advice as well. People who are out of the schemes, non-stereotype, who are hypergeniuses in everything, or have one problem others cannot even imagine. I'm sure there are celebrities (at least semi-celebrities...) here. I'm sure there are autistic geniuses. I'm sure there are very rich people with priviledges the 80% of the remaining forum members can only dream about.
And to them, being that way is normal! It's their daily life.
To them, it's nothing unique or extraordinary!
But they also need advice now and then. They would like to hear other people's opinions as well. Opinions don't come only from people who have the same problems and social, physical or educational backgrounds.
We're in an open-minded world, and I thought internet was the instrument expressing this freedom to communicate and grow in harmony.
In a recent post I wrote just a few hours ago, I tried to expose my problems with understanding a girl who was unique in my experience with girls.
As background information I mentioned my previous experiences with relating to girls (I used the expression "liked by all girls"), a condition that to OTHERS can be unique, extraordinary, or even impossible, depending on who you are.
In all cases, it seems that I was categorized by most as "arrogant".
In spite of my apologies in which I tried to downplay my background information, the discussion, which was actually evolving into a nice conversation, was discontinued by the moderating team.
I must personally admit that I was slighltly disappointed by such kind of discrimination, but I'm stoic. I accept how things are and try to solve them from scratch.
But I want to know what YOU think about it.
How would you advise a person with "extraordinary" situations (both positive or negative) to portray his background or whatever without being tagged as "arrogant"?
Is it a matter of expressions?
The choice of vocabulary?
Or should the whole situation be downplayed, dissimulated, or even partially censored, in order to obtain a more respectable set of answers from a forum like this?
In my example, could I have simply written in the topic line "How to flirt with a shy girl?" without providing details on my personal background?
Would the others have understood my situation more or less depending on the information I provided?
Thank you for reading. Your help is deeply appreciated.
First of all, today is my birthday and it's early morning. I should be sleeping and preparing for a sunny day.
Yet, for the sake of understanding how to improve my online social life (which in a modern era has a large impact on the development of one's physical life - at least, in my case it is; without internet I wouldn't have found info on university, people from other countries, opinions etc..), I couldn't fall asleep, and I'm here to ask you straightforwardly how I can solve what is probably my greatest personal problem.
In physical life I've never encountered this problem; to me, personally, this is only an online or written-communication phenomena.
I have already asked this once, and although a majority of people acknowledged my views, when it came to the actual behaviour, I've often felt let down.
What ails me?
The fact that, e.g. on a forum like this one, in order to ask for advice or even give advice, I can't report factual backgrounds of a situation or condition that might be unique and extraordinary - both negatively and positively - without being immediately tagged as arrogant.
What do I mean with this?
An extreme example would be a forum-addicted member of the royal family asking for advice on a factor in his personal life, based on the values he grew up around, which might obviously be different from those of the majority of forum-ers.
The example might be "extreme" to me and a majority of others, but how can we judge whether the person EXPERIENCING it doesn't perceive it as absolutely normal?
Maybe the prince would like some advice, some sincere and small opinion, on how he should dress to see a "common girl".
"I usually wear golden pijamas, but I would like to be modest this time. What about Armani, Calvin Klein, etc.?"
I'm not saying that I'm a member of the royal family, but what I expect more or less from a forum like this one is perception of arrogance, or at least a huge barrage of skepsis and personal attacks that are not targeted at the topic itself but at the person who wrote it.
I don't know whether there are princes and princesses visiting this forum (especially this subforum), but I'm sure that in such a big forum which is so famous for education and as far as I know is highly ranked on search machines, etc., there surely are some "exceptional" people who need advice as well. People who are out of the schemes, non-stereotype, who are hypergeniuses in everything, or have one problem others cannot even imagine. I'm sure there are celebrities (at least semi-celebrities...) here. I'm sure there are autistic geniuses. I'm sure there are very rich people with priviledges the 80% of the remaining forum members can only dream about.
And to them, being that way is normal! It's their daily life.
To them, it's nothing unique or extraordinary!
But they also need advice now and then. They would like to hear other people's opinions as well. Opinions don't come only from people who have the same problems and social, physical or educational backgrounds.
We're in an open-minded world, and I thought internet was the instrument expressing this freedom to communicate and grow in harmony.
In a recent post I wrote just a few hours ago, I tried to expose my problems with understanding a girl who was unique in my experience with girls.
As background information I mentioned my previous experiences with relating to girls (I used the expression "liked by all girls"), a condition that to OTHERS can be unique, extraordinary, or even impossible, depending on who you are.
In all cases, it seems that I was categorized by most as "arrogant".
In spite of my apologies in which I tried to downplay my background information, the discussion, which was actually evolving into a nice conversation, was discontinued by the moderating team.
I must personally admit that I was slighltly disappointed by such kind of discrimination, but I'm stoic. I accept how things are and try to solve them from scratch.
But I want to know what YOU think about it.
How would you advise a person with "extraordinary" situations (both positive or negative) to portray his background or whatever without being tagged as "arrogant"?
Is it a matter of expressions?
The choice of vocabulary?
Or should the whole situation be downplayed, dissimulated, or even partially censored, in order to obtain a more respectable set of answers from a forum like this?
In my example, could I have simply written in the topic line "How to flirt with a shy girl?" without providing details on my personal background?
Would the others have understood my situation more or less depending on the information I provided?
Thank you for reading. Your help is deeply appreciated.
Scroll to see replies
Reply 1
Firstly, dealing with the specific of the thread you posted I think people were annoyed because:
a) what you suggested doesn't seem even remotely plausable. Certainly, there are people who might be found attractive by a large percentage of the opposite sex. A large percentage might also be liked 'as a person' (yes, I know that's awful, I left my big big of phrases that aren't **** on the bus) by a large percentage of the opposite sex. But to really 'like' and to be 'head over heels with' (your phrases, my raised-eyebrow inverted commas) someone, you have to have both of these things. And I really have a hard time -- based on personal experience -- believing that anyone could be so perfect. People have extremely wide tastes in terms of what is or isn't attractive or does or does not make a good person. This should be evident to anyone who has ever interacted with a group of people ever.
b) you were a bit condescending with the italics and what not.
Having said that, then, your claim just doesn't seem realistic. Perhaps you need to clarify it: do all girls find you attractive? Do all girls enjoy talking to you? Or something else?
Okay then, with that out of the way, let's presume what you've said is totally accurate. Every girl (except the one in that thread) you have ever encountered both finds you irresistably gorgeous and thinks you're a swell dude.
Well...people don't take too kindly to people who are immensely gifted and successful without working for it. It's human nature, and though we try to overcome it, the jealousy gets the better of all of us at times. I mean if you are perfect:
i) Why the hell are you coming to fallible people for advice anyway?
ii) Isn't it right and just that all men should take blows at one time or another? Heaven knows the rest of us take enough, why should I sympathise with you?
Those are two things someone might post if they were feeling particularly unguarded/stroppy. You might have noticed a popular joke we have on this planet:
INT: Somewhere pretty nice.
A MAN is there, he is rich and wearing A SUIT MADE OF GOLD AND MONEY AND OIL AND WEALTH.
The MAN falls over.
The end. It's a surefire hit (well, okay, it isn't, but imagine we live in a planet populated by easily-pleased morons [in these square brackets I will make a joke in which I suggest that this thing I have asked you to imagine is in fact the current state of affairs]). We enjoy seeing privelidged people take a fall, because we're all jealous, vain and insecure...some of us more than others, and at some times more than others. It's not fair in any way: why should you be robbed of your privelidges, you've done nothing wrong. Why should you hide them? It's not your fault you have them. It's an accident of fate that people get worked up about: like Scotland qualifying for the World Cup or one's nationality. But anyway, this leaves you with three clear options:
a) Just say, 'ahahaha everyone loves me...lalalala' (la-ing optional, ha-ing mandatory.) People will shake their fists at you. Hard. They will not help or advise you.
b) Be a bit self-depreciative and play your gifts down. People will warm to you eventually, most of the ones who aren't ***** anyway. You might feel like you're play acting.
c) Have a horrible achille's heel (like Achilees...he had his heel) like a dead mother or a crippling cocaine habit or a lazy eye or a stupid voice. Then people will say 'ah, do you see, we are each of us special flowers, flawed and yet beautiful, ahhh' and they'll make a TV movie about you.
It's up to you really. I'd choose B, but you might find it something of a dishonest front. Your choice. But don't forget never to value that which can be taken away from you.
Or in other words: you'll lose your hair and teeth and motor functions eventually, just like everyone else. We'll all be square then. You bastard.
EDIT: Just to sledgehammer home some stuff I maybe didn't concentrate enough on: there is no reason, logically, why you should either hide or play down your advantages. But it's true that the vast majority of people don't like having other people's fortuity rubbed in their faces (not unless you pat them gently on the shoulder with your other hand anyway); it reminds them of their own shortcomings, and what they will never have. Even people who are mostly secure will perhaps have some tinge of self-doubt when confronted with someone claiming to be perfect. Most of us here are at an age when insecurity is at its highest (I read this. On a graph...time versus insecurity). You, it seems, cannot live in a bubble, you need help from us regular Ishmaels, and so...well...I think the point I'm making is a clear one. I'm being a pragmatist, like that nice John Major.
a) what you suggested doesn't seem even remotely plausable. Certainly, there are people who might be found attractive by a large percentage of the opposite sex. A large percentage might also be liked 'as a person' (yes, I know that's awful, I left my big big of phrases that aren't **** on the bus) by a large percentage of the opposite sex. But to really 'like' and to be 'head over heels with' (your phrases, my raised-eyebrow inverted commas) someone, you have to have both of these things. And I really have a hard time -- based on personal experience -- believing that anyone could be so perfect. People have extremely wide tastes in terms of what is or isn't attractive or does or does not make a good person. This should be evident to anyone who has ever interacted with a group of people ever.
b) you were a bit condescending with the italics and what not.
Having said that, then, your claim just doesn't seem realistic. Perhaps you need to clarify it: do all girls find you attractive? Do all girls enjoy talking to you? Or something else?
Okay then, with that out of the way, let's presume what you've said is totally accurate. Every girl (except the one in that thread) you have ever encountered both finds you irresistably gorgeous and thinks you're a swell dude.
Well...people don't take too kindly to people who are immensely gifted and successful without working for it. It's human nature, and though we try to overcome it, the jealousy gets the better of all of us at times. I mean if you are perfect:
i) Why the hell are you coming to fallible people for advice anyway?
ii) Isn't it right and just that all men should take blows at one time or another? Heaven knows the rest of us take enough, why should I sympathise with you?
Those are two things someone might post if they were feeling particularly unguarded/stroppy. You might have noticed a popular joke we have on this planet:
INT: Somewhere pretty nice.
A MAN is there, he is rich and wearing A SUIT MADE OF GOLD AND MONEY AND OIL AND WEALTH.
The MAN falls over.
The end. It's a surefire hit (well, okay, it isn't, but imagine we live in a planet populated by easily-pleased morons [in these square brackets I will make a joke in which I suggest that this thing I have asked you to imagine is in fact the current state of affairs]). We enjoy seeing privelidged people take a fall, because we're all jealous, vain and insecure...some of us more than others, and at some times more than others. It's not fair in any way: why should you be robbed of your privelidges, you've done nothing wrong. Why should you hide them? It's not your fault you have them. It's an accident of fate that people get worked up about: like Scotland qualifying for the World Cup or one's nationality. But anyway, this leaves you with three clear options:
a) Just say, 'ahahaha everyone loves me...lalalala' (la-ing optional, ha-ing mandatory.) People will shake their fists at you. Hard. They will not help or advise you.
b) Be a bit self-depreciative and play your gifts down. People will warm to you eventually, most of the ones who aren't ***** anyway. You might feel like you're play acting.
c) Have a horrible achille's heel (like Achilees...he had his heel) like a dead mother or a crippling cocaine habit or a lazy eye or a stupid voice. Then people will say 'ah, do you see, we are each of us special flowers, flawed and yet beautiful, ahhh' and they'll make a TV movie about you.
It's up to you really. I'd choose B, but you might find it something of a dishonest front. Your choice. But don't forget never to value that which can be taken away from you.
Or in other words: you'll lose your hair and teeth and motor functions eventually, just like everyone else. We'll all be square then. You bastard.
EDIT: Just to sledgehammer home some stuff I maybe didn't concentrate enough on: there is no reason, logically, why you should either hide or play down your advantages. But it's true that the vast majority of people don't like having other people's fortuity rubbed in their faces (not unless you pat them gently on the shoulder with your other hand anyway); it reminds them of their own shortcomings, and what they will never have. Even people who are mostly secure will perhaps have some tinge of self-doubt when confronted with someone claiming to be perfect. Most of us here are at an age when insecurity is at its highest (I read this. On a graph...time versus insecurity). You, it seems, cannot live in a bubble, you need help from us regular Ishmaels, and so...well...I think the point I'm making is a clear one. I'm being a pragmatist, like that nice John Major.
Reply 2
Leave the internet.
If you think it has much to do with your social life you NEED to rethink what path your life is taking.
If you think it has much to do with your social life you NEED to rethink what path your life is taking.
Reply 3
as a general question, why do people who think they STINK, or even worse EXCEL, in an online social life, will EVER get to succeed in REAL PHYSICAL social life?
and secondly, WHY do people tell other people to 'get a (social) life' OVER the internet, when they themselves KNOW of their own ignorance? i smell hypocrisy. well, as a wise man said, hypocrisy and ignorance go hand in hand. heck, maybe hypocrisy is ignorance. well, i'm off to enjoy the party downstairs. see ya.
and secondly, WHY do people tell other people to 'get a (social) life' OVER the internet, when they themselves KNOW of their own ignorance? i smell hypocrisy. well, as a wise man said, hypocrisy and ignorance go hand in hand. heck, maybe hypocrisy is ignorance. well, i'm off to enjoy the party downstairs. see ya.
Reply 4
Bread and Circlejerks - that was brilliant: I agree with everything you said. Rep coming your way!
Reply 8
3232
I dont know if anyone has ever told you this before, but you sound a little arrogant.
Hahaha rep for you
Reply 9
I'm a princess....
i suppose i see what you mean, but this is where a problem is posed.
the internet, forums especially... it really is for everyone. go to the theatre these days and you can still get boxes. go to the cinema.. well, you cna have your own private cinema/screening if you're rich enough. air travel? first class. segregation, or division for want of a better word, by financial status/celebrity status (there is often a large overlap between the two), is commonplace in society. in london, you might have a cheap local pub on a street corner. a few miles away, there might be gentlemen's clubs.
now, obviously you'd never get people of a lower social position coming into gentleman's clubs or having private cinema screenings... but you can obviously get it the other way round. i'm sure prince william could pop into the local pub of a quiet mining village somewhere if he wanted to. but what makes the higher end clubs so private? money, pretty much, as well as physical security and separation.
places on the internet lack this. perhaps there could be a niche in the market for an online forum, where members pay heavy fees (which both the unfamous rich and average celebrities could popbably afford) in order to socialise exclusively, albeit virtually. i've never heard of this though. it seems that, to carry on using this rather average metaphor, that most internet forums are local pubs, large football grounds, free entry night clubs where a mixer costs £2. you wouldn't walk into a local pub and try to have an in depth conversation about whether cristal champagne is nicer than dom perignon. well you could and a) might be very lucky in finding someone who's just as rich/into champagne or b) people would inevitably have an opinion of you and be unable to actually answer your question. the latter the most likely.
i'm not saying everyone on the internet is common, in the real life sense of the word, the vast vast majority will just be regular people who aren't super rich, super intelligent or super famous. i just think it's a bit unreasonable and a bit unrealistic to come onto an internet forum and expect a) everyone to understand your problems in context with your rare life situation and b) there to be a significant amount of people who are in similar enough circimstances to understand.
if you really do seek advice about these are circumstantial issues, seek a specialist forum, or even create one. on the other hand, if anyone lives a certain type of lifestyle in the real world, it won't be by themselves. if they're rich, they're likely to have other rich friends; if they're famous, then they'll probably know other celebs. rather than using the internet as a form of escapism and an opportunity for easy anonymity, seek advice for these 'real' situations in 'real' life.
the internet, forums especially... it really is for everyone. go to the theatre these days and you can still get boxes. go to the cinema.. well, you cna have your own private cinema/screening if you're rich enough. air travel? first class. segregation, or division for want of a better word, by financial status/celebrity status (there is often a large overlap between the two), is commonplace in society. in london, you might have a cheap local pub on a street corner. a few miles away, there might be gentlemen's clubs.
now, obviously you'd never get people of a lower social position coming into gentleman's clubs or having private cinema screenings... but you can obviously get it the other way round. i'm sure prince william could pop into the local pub of a quiet mining village somewhere if he wanted to. but what makes the higher end clubs so private? money, pretty much, as well as physical security and separation.
places on the internet lack this. perhaps there could be a niche in the market for an online forum, where members pay heavy fees (which both the unfamous rich and average celebrities could popbably afford) in order to socialise exclusively, albeit virtually. i've never heard of this though. it seems that, to carry on using this rather average metaphor, that most internet forums are local pubs, large football grounds, free entry night clubs where a mixer costs £2. you wouldn't walk into a local pub and try to have an in depth conversation about whether cristal champagne is nicer than dom perignon. well you could and a) might be very lucky in finding someone who's just as rich/into champagne or b) people would inevitably have an opinion of you and be unable to actually answer your question. the latter the most likely.
i'm not saying everyone on the internet is common, in the real life sense of the word, the vast vast majority will just be regular people who aren't super rich, super intelligent or super famous. i just think it's a bit unreasonable and a bit unrealistic to come onto an internet forum and expect a) everyone to understand your problems in context with your rare life situation and b) there to be a significant amount of people who are in similar enough circimstances to understand.
if you really do seek advice about these are circumstantial issues, seek a specialist forum, or even create one. on the other hand, if anyone lives a certain type of lifestyle in the real world, it won't be by themselves. if they're rich, they're likely to have other rich friends; if they're famous, then they'll probably know other celebs. rather than using the internet as a form of escapism and an opportunity for easy anonymity, seek advice for these 'real' situations in 'real' life.
Anonymous
In a recent post I wrote just a few hours ago, I tried to expose my problems with understanding a girl who was unique in my experience with girls.
As background information I mentioned my previous experiences with relating to girls (I used the expression "liked by all girls"), a condition that to OTHERS can be unique, extraordinary, or even impossible, depending on who you are.
As background information I mentioned my previous experiences with relating to girls (I used the expression "liked by all girls"), a condition that to OTHERS can be unique, extraordinary, or even impossible, depending on who you are.
You were the guy who said all these models in your school were falling for you aren't you? Well if that is you that is incredibly arrogant and I don't really think you have much to complain about when you say stuff like that. That's a lot different to saying "liked by all girls".
You do understand what arrogant means don't you?
1. making claims or pretensions to superior importance or rights; overbearingly assuming; insolently proud: an arrogant public official.
2. characterized by or proceeding from arrogance: arrogant claims
Now please explain to me how this doesn't categorize you, in light of your beating models off comment.
And in light of this topic, not only are you an arrogant ****, but you're also a pussy
Reply 12
I won't try to discuss about myself and my background any further; If I had the means, I would invite all of you over here, so that you could experience me with your own eyes as a real physical person. 
But the whole point of both the former and the present thread is not my attractivity or whatsoever; it's the online communication of it.
Let's say that decades ago, there were forums like this one.
Let's say Mahatma Gandhi had some personal doubts (how can you know whether he hadn't got them?) and wanted to simply hear some advice from other people; he does it anonymously on an internet forum like this one.
"Hi everyone. I have a problem. All people in my village do what I tell them to do. All people respect me. I have some kind of divine charisma.
I'm also a very humble person and everyone knows it, and I think many people like me due to that.
But I feel short, and that's probably why that top model in London doesn't like me. Please help me."
My personal idea of an internet advice forum is (was): you write the information, the variables, the objective facts as you know them, without any emotional intention targeted at the people you are asking... and you get a list of results. A bit like Google, a bit like the rest of the threads on almost all other subforums here (concerning university, education, etc.).
Information. Not insults.
Yet, on this specific subforum, users would have answered to poor anonymous-Mahatma in following way:
You arrogant prick. You claim to be respected by everyone. Nobody would want you if they knew how you perceive yourself. Learn how to be really humble, then you might get your chick. bla-bla-bla. Stop boasting! etc.
Why?
According to your logic, why would any person posting anonymously in order to obtain information want to boast about him- or herself? What's the sense of boasting anonymously? :P
And now let's come to the information...
How can you think that the anonymous poster saying "I have some kind of divine charisma" is telling that with an arrogant tone (which Mahatma was surely not doing?)?
How the h-ll can you infer that he is saying that in a condescending way?
Or is it also arrogant to know that you have charisma?
"All people in my village respect me." He knows it. And he says it, providing a piece of information about himself, since it is part of his background and might be important to understand his problem.
Insolently proud?
Pretentions to superior importance?
Overbearingly assuming?
How can you know?
By inferring arrogance, you are distorting the whole information, tailoring it according to your own tastes.
Just because not everyone in the world is respected by many people as he is doesn't mean that saying it makes him arrogant.
You get what I mean?
...
Bread and Circlejerks
Thus... according to you, altruism and advice should be only for common people with "major" difficulties?
I would understand this kind of behaviour in real life. But on internet? Where true and complete information is more important than the way it is conveyed (at least, so I used to think)?
Anyway, thanks for the advice.
But the whole point of both the former and the present thread is not my attractivity or whatsoever; it's the online communication of it.
Let's say that decades ago, there were forums like this one.
Let's say Mahatma Gandhi had some personal doubts (how can you know whether he hadn't got them?) and wanted to simply hear some advice from other people; he does it anonymously on an internet forum like this one.
"Hi everyone. I have a problem. All people in my village do what I tell them to do. All people respect me. I have some kind of divine charisma.
I'm also a very humble person and everyone knows it, and I think many people like me due to that.
But I feel short, and that's probably why that top model in London doesn't like me. Please help me."
My personal idea of an internet advice forum is (was): you write the information, the variables, the objective facts as you know them, without any emotional intention targeted at the people you are asking... and you get a list of results. A bit like Google, a bit like the rest of the threads on almost all other subforums here (concerning university, education, etc.).
Information. Not insults.
Yet, on this specific subforum, users would have answered to poor anonymous-Mahatma in following way:
You arrogant prick. You claim to be respected by everyone. Nobody would want you if they knew how you perceive yourself. Learn how to be really humble, then you might get your chick. bla-bla-bla. Stop boasting! etc.
Why?
According to your logic, why would any person posting anonymously in order to obtain information want to boast about him- or herself? What's the sense of boasting anonymously? :P
And now let's come to the information...
How can you think that the anonymous poster saying "I have some kind of divine charisma" is telling that with an arrogant tone (which Mahatma was surely not doing?)?
How the h-ll can you infer that he is saying that in a condescending way?
Or is it also arrogant to know that you have charisma?
"All people in my village respect me." He knows it. And he says it, providing a piece of information about himself, since it is part of his background and might be important to understand his problem.
Insolently proud?
Pretentions to superior importance?
Overbearingly assuming?
How can you know?
By inferring arrogance, you are distorting the whole information, tailoring it according to your own tastes.
Just because not everyone in the world is respected by many people as he is doesn't mean that saying it makes him arrogant.
You get what I mean?
...
Bread and Circlejerks
ii) Isn't it right and just that all men should take blows at one time or another? Heaven knows the rest of us take enough, why should I sympathise with you?
Thus... according to you, altruism and advice should be only for common people with "major" difficulties?
b) Be a bit self-depreciative and play your gifts down. People will warm to you eventually, most of the ones who aren't ***** anyway. You might feel like you're play acting.
c) Have a horrible achille's heel (like Achilees...he had his heel) like a dead mother or a crippling cocaine habit or a lazy eye or a stupid voice. Then people will say 'ah, do you see, we are each of us special flowers, flawed and yet beautiful, ahhh' and they'll make a TV movie about you.
c) Have a horrible achille's heel (like Achilees...he had his heel) like a dead mother or a crippling cocaine habit or a lazy eye or a stupid voice. Then people will say 'ah, do you see, we are each of us special flowers, flawed and yet beautiful, ahhh' and they'll make a TV movie about you.
I would understand this kind of behaviour in real life. But on internet? Where true and complete information is more important than the way it is conveyed (at least, so I used to think)?
Anyway, thanks for the advice.
Reply 13
Because you should damn well be arrogant enough to sort your own problems out.
Reply 14
Why the hell do you need a circle of internet nerds?
Reply 15
This is not like google at all. If you ask for an opinion from people you will receive. Information will only come from a factual question, like maths.
Unless you are very far removed from society you will know that our society is such that confidence is easily misjudged or what one person considers an innocent fact about themselves will be deemed arrogance by another.
That's life, people think differently. That you cannot change. Some people are jealous and insecure - this is something we all know.
Unless you are very far removed from society you will know that our society is such that confidence is easily misjudged or what one person considers an innocent fact about themselves will be deemed arrogance by another.
That's life, people think differently. That you cannot change. Some people are jealous and insecure - this is something we all know.
Reply 16
need some help working my computer machine ancetera vvv
Reply 17
Anonymous
Thus... according to you, altruism and advice should be only for common people with "major" difficulties?
No, I was using that as an example of an attitude you might be met with, not defending or appropriating that attitude myself.
I would understand this kind of behaviour in real life. But on internet? Where true and complete information is more important than the way it is conveyed (at least, so I used to think)?
Anyway, thanks for the advice.
Anyway, thanks for the advice.
What difference does it make whether this is the internet or not? I really don't understand why you'd expect peoples' fundamental social attitudes to change just because they're typing advice rather than saying it using their mouths and tongues.
Your most recent post suggests that you seem to view other posters as a bunch of look-up tables designed for vomiting out solutions to your problems. They aren't, and they're no more likely to give you helpful advice (and just as likely to take their opinion of you into account when replying to you) than they would be if they could look at and touch your face.
Reply 18
Idiot. The internet means nothing.
Tbh, you sound like a complete prick anyway. The register with with you wrote your posts was made you look not only arrogant but pompous. Almost like you were trying to show that, as well as being God's gift to women (wow, they really love you) you were also intellectually superior.
Try writing in a slightly more casual and realistic way. Then maybe it wouldn't feel as though you're attempting to patronise those that you are seeking advice from and you may get a more favourable response. Di*k.
Try writing in a slightly more casual and realistic way. Then maybe it wouldn't feel as though you're attempting to patronise those that you are seeking advice from and you may get a more favourable response. Di*k.
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