The Student Room Group

Interracial relationships (i'm a bloke)

Hey im new to this forum. (this is rather long so only read if you are prepared to be patient)

I think I should give a bit of background, im macanese (I am of portugese and chinese ancestry) so look nearly like a male of mixed race. I recently moved to the UK to live with my grand parents (whom are portugese) and to study at a 6th form. But before I moved I lived in a generally homogenous and very conservative and catholic society unlike hong kong (you were either chinese or macanese) and there was little contact with whites. But english is my joint first language with portugese.

This may sound really wierd but well i am unsure about interracial relationships. The girls in the UK seem a bit different to the girls from Macau in which they act and not surprisingly the way they look. in terms of appearance im generally alright becuase my grand parents are white. However there is a girl whom I like, and I think she likes me but we kinda act as if we don't like each other. First she is blonde and has green eyes which is really beautiful but I kinda shy away, is it because im not used to seeing girls that look like this? Seondly from where i came from girls kinda openly come up to chat to boys. However she kinda acts in a different way. Whenever im studying in the college libary and when she is there she stands to my side and just picks some books out randomly and then just puts them away, when I turn and look at her she just walks away after a few seconds and well just looks at me and the last time I spoke to her she giggled at my english (I think i kinda stuck some portugese in it) but when her girl friends appear she just shys away paying with her hair. This may sound wierd in the UK but guys from where i came from are supposed to be more reserved (im catholic as well) at my age and well we are not expected to really talk to girls in this way.

But generally i really don't know what to do. I really quite like this girl but there is something in my head just kinda preventing me from getting close to her (strange huh). i heard from my cousin that interacial relationships (he is white and non-christian) are very common in the UK however it is rare for east asian blokes to be with white girls.
British people do not like foreigners. I recommend you prepare yourself for extensive periods of isolation.
Reply 2
British people do not like foreigners


May i ask what nationality are you? This certainly isin't true
Reply 3
my ex was english and i was new in the country and we went out for 2 years and he was older,we loved each other and i'm black,and it was fine. it'll take a while but you'll get used to it. it happens when you first move to a place. i suggest just trying to talk to her,and get to know her a bit better,and if you're sure you really fancy her,then just ask her out :smile: goodluck :hugs: and have fun!
Reply 4
Convalescent
British people do not like foreigners. I recommend you prepare yourself for extensive periods of isolation.


a joke? or would you just happen to be a member of the BNP by any chance?
Vincente
May i ask what nationality are you? This certainly isin't true


I, rather unfortunately, am British; however, I am generally nice to foreigners.

January Victim
a joke? or would you just happen to be a member of the BNP by any chance?


No, I am not joking. It is something I have observed using my acutely developed senses. How would my thinking that 'British people do not like foreigners' and being in the BNP have any relation?
Reply 6
typically most BNP members don't like foreigners and want them out.
plus i still say you're wrong about the Brits not liking foreigners,most do,and the others are shy and don't know what to say/do and so they don't talk to them,but when they do get to know the person it doesn't matter.and there are also the racists and the xenophobes (Can't relate easily with foreigners) and lastly the BNP that make up the population of foreigner haters.but with xenophobes it's a condition,a phobia so it's not exactly their fault.
Reply 7
umm any more help with my situation would be great
Anonymous
umm any more help with my situation would be great


That is a fairly difficult question to answer. If you want to make friends with the 'natives' you have to be of a higher calibre of human being to do so. Be really nice, friendly, funny etc. This way, you might be able to make friends. If your personality does not enable you to do this, or if people are still rejecting you, then you have to be friends with those of your own race. Failing this, then you may want to consider leaving the country.
Reply 9
I am able to settle in with guys becuase i went to an international school (70% white). But it is with girls that is the problem.
If you like her then just go for it.

But my brother is dating a white girl (we're black) whose parents told her they'd rather have a gay son than her dating a black boy. So be prepared, there are a lot of people in the older generation who are still racist and they could be her parents.
It's not because you're not Nigerian.
Reply 12
about double posting yeah im using my brother's account
Is there an echo in here?
shady lane
If you like her then just go for it.

But my brother is dating a white girl (we're black) whose parents told her they'd rather have a gay son than her dating a black boy. So be prepared, there are a lot of people in the older generation who are still racist and they could be her parents.
Not really, my grandad's white British (ppl are surprised to hear this) and he's one of the least racist people I know.

He even came to my school once to talk about how to be more tolerant, so it just depends on the individual really! A lot of young people today are quite judgemental unfortunately.
shady lane

But my brother is dating a white girl (we're black) whose parents told her they'd rather have a gay son than her dating a black boy.
That is pretty bad tho, sorry to hear that stuff still goes on in this day and age.

Don't let it have an effect, you sound very smart and clever :smile: